Living in a world full of darkness

My blog post suppose to be positive

2011-12-05T03:37:00.002+08:00

I'm suppose to stay strong and look ahead and fight finish this nonsense.
I do not want to go through such nonsense anymore.

As for that idiotic angels, one with strong will to go against the flow, another has strong will to praise God.. ya whatever.
I will make my point out when the time is right.

This is the end of my chapter of my life, I am left with one option.
Finish it, do it, achieve it.

I may get tired, but I won't feel tired therefor I won't be tired.
I have life, a breath, a mind, a will.. that is what I need to overcome it.
If God is good, he better be.. cause this is the time where if I am left with like no option, He has to intervene. Otherwise my life from the start till the end is meaningless..

Speaking of which is Christmas day.. is coming soon.
The last christmas all I remember was giving present to Anne Anne...
and that's it.

Oh well, nothing much to type about anyway. Is time for me to sleep.

I vowed this and that by someone :D

2011-12-01T11:34:00.004+08:00

"At this life-changing point, I choose to again make some vows, like I made a few last year at the start of my life abroad.

I vow to cling on to the faith and proudly profess that I serve the Lord and only the Lord. Not money, not my job, not my clients, not my boss. All these things are only temporary, and they can change whenever they want to, but He is forevermore.

I vow to make family a priority in as many things as I can. I am already learning from the mistakes of others.

I vow to steer clear of unethical behaviour, regardless of how strong the temptation is. Even if it means an easier life, even if it means more money at the end of the month. No, I shall not.

I vow to not start swearing, cussing or using even just ‘slightly’ rude language. It is saddening to see how some people who have never spoken out a ‘damn’ have all used stronger words after they have entered the working world, and I hope to not do the same.

I vow to maintain, if not strengthen, my relationship with my Best Friend, as I should have been doing consistently (but admittedly have not in the recent months). I vow not to let my job get in the way between Him and I.

I vow to seek Him first in all that I do, especially during this time when there are prospects of more attractive employers other than my current first one.

.

Of course, it’s easier said than done, isn’t it? When the pressures of deadlines loom about, and my finances start getting tight, there is a high chance of wanting to break one or more of those vows. So please, please, PLEASE, hold me accountable against all that I have said here. I need all the teguran I can get, if ever I stray off track and lose focus on what’s most important in this brief and temporary life. The distractions and temptation of work, whether big or small, can really create a detour for which there is no U-turn.

.

I commit the start and the rest of my working life to You, Lord! Lead and guide me, if You will."

If you ever freaking read this entry, or this blog.
Look listen here.. everytime when I read such entry, it does make me feel like you're being all hypocrite and so on. Vow this and that nonsense in comparison with how you deal things with me? Vow my ass.

But nevertheless in my goodie boy vision,
I see myself talking to you serious stuff to keep you pump up to make sure that you'll be able to stick to that. Give you support to make you stand up again whenever things may lead you to break those vows.
Ya I would also VOW with you to tell myself to make YOU THAT person you want to be.

But just too bad you and I are no longer friends anyway.
Nor you even think of patching things up.
So as my normal reaction will be when I read those.
Oh.. there you go again, good girl to people, bad girl to me. great ^^V
Yet the best thing you can tell me is, you're mad when I called you bitch but you are actually acting like ONE to ME.

Stop giving me excuse why we shouldn't patch things up.
I can proudly shout it out that it is God desire to see us supporting each other,
and go through the Christian lives together, be there for one and another.

Why all these years you've been avoiding that?
Mainly because of your selfish reason anyway.
I have to take that as an answer because NO OTHER answer on earth makes more sense than that.. girl who vowed to God many things. =.=

Angelic girls who aren't so angel specifically in front of you.

2011-11-30T02:30:00.002+08:00

There is this girl that I know when I was young..
Specifically when I was in secondary school.
Look like an angel, talk like an angel, behave like an angel.

She.. praise the Lord out loud as always.
Being very active in the Christian Fellowship.
When she greet people, she always said "God bless you" and of course will always have a smile :D

Anyway one regardless guy or girl will agree with me by saying "Kawaii desu ne"
So if people always ask me how will I describe her?

I'll always say that she is one of the MOST angelic girl I've ever seen in my life.
Too angelic that I even tell myself that I want her as my wife when I was young and yes I was that serious at that time.

But never thought is has already been SEVEN years knowing that girl,
till I now realize that actually I don't get along well with angelic girls.
Why?

Because most angelic girls I know is either too boring in a way that they just want to close themselves up or they are just friendly on selected people.
What I mean by selected people is you know in your heart that they choose people to be friends and close with, choose until like you can just predict most of their actions in their life.

Uh~

So today I would like to share my experiences and thoughts about this angelic girl okay?

I know this angelic girl since very young, but we aren't that good friends though.
Never was either, but more like just we know each other, and I remember until today the BEST and CLOSEST thing that ever happen between me and her is she invited me to see her performance and THAT's IT. I'm like.. o.O okay so why the hell you invited me for?

She's not that smart academically, she cries when she fails in academic, very active in co-curricular activities. She's girly and cute but doesn't use much make up, just a perfect wife material that I can sense that's all.
The complete the package is she has heart warming smile that when you see that it just makes you remember that she is a bubbly and friendly person.

So let me tell you my ENCOUNTER with her where how I justify that I don't get along well with her.

When I was 16, I get her number through a friend,
was playfully sms-ed her to ask her guess who am I.
She immediately message back "If you dun tell me who u are, I'm not going to reply."
Ya. So much for the "angel" side of her.
So fine I gave up playing games and just tell her, but after replying she just kills off the topic by the usual lines such as "O I see " and then not replying the next question.
At that time I did get pretty upset, because to me she is like the most angelic girl I've ever known until today, she is ONE of the MOST angelic girl, that you know..
Always want to praise the lord in facebook, twitter, and everywhere she go.

When I was 17,
we didn't really talk also, but I remember there is this CF(christian fellowship) farewell party, and then of course most of us will be saying a few lines to one and another. I remember she said "God bless you" to me with that smile again and shook my hand too.
Ya GBU this GBU that.. I didn't get sick of it yet. I just take it as Ohh whatever, because at that time I've already got agenda in liking some other not so angelic girl like her.

18,19,20.
I remember there is one my good friend ask her to join me and one girl and him to sit down together in McDonalds to chill la, and she refused it. Okay, is fair that you can say that AWKWARD maa.. but.. I don't know, two of us are your schoolmate and you are like so active and talkative when comes to socializing, we definitely can talk about the long time no see topic. But you didn't?
We didn't bother, but years later I know what cause the awkwardness anyway.

I don't know which year she invited me to her church christmas event, where she will be performing. I DIDN'T want to go at first, cause I know I will be going alone.
But end up I did because she personally PM me and asked again.
So to give face to her, so I'm like why not?
So this time, I have so to said more "REASONS" to talk to her/catch up and get to know more about her.

But it didn't turn out that way,
she was like some kind of ROBOT like that.
Introduce me to her Elder, her pastor, her churchmate this and that and never bother to even like talk something with me. Like come on, if she is a quiet person, I understand, but NOPE, she is the kind of girl that I remember who is active when comes to socializing. She is the type of girl where you know that people will choose her to make those announcement and all that.
I've tried my ultimate best to ask those basics questions, even ask about more serious stuff about her lifestyle of being involve in many GOOD activities too.
But then.. you just know that she is just trying to kill of the topic in a very so called "angelic way".

After many years, came to know many types of girls which I get along better than her.
In fact I feel that I might even get along better with girls whom they feel that they are more towards the diabolic side. :P
Oh by the way, girls like her don't use the "F-U-C-K" word.
But what the heck, today most of the ones I get along use the word like drinking water only.

Till today, I don't know what goes through her mind when is about me.
But I think my hypothesis was right all along.
"She thinks negatively about me."

I've actually did my part by trying.. you know.. try try laa by making the move to know her more by asking more about her involvement in events that involve a society or a group of Christians to gather.
But.. I don't know.. she always seem to like ignore it.

SO much for the angelic thought that I have, I think I'll just have to throw that thoughts away. She is angelic, when I go up to heaven I'll agree with God if He said she is. But I'll surely ask God, why..

You may say I think too much, but ok.. it may not be that bad but what I mean negatively here it means.. something unpleasant like she thinks I'm a crazy dude that simply do things that don't know how to think. Or she thinks I am the person which what her friends tell her.

So to conclude,
sometimes those angelic girls you see especially in your religious society may appear like they are like mother teressa. But sometimes they just can't appear like an angel in front of you, they appear like they just don't give a fuck about you.
But wherelese some girls you thought that she's so bitchy like you've seen the worst bitch in your life, they are the ones that could turn out to be your best friend ever. Why? Because only you could give them a reason to change, or perhaps you are the reason that could make them think before they act...

SO to that angelic girl that I'm writing.
Yes God bless you and me too,
we both are at the same age already.
I know in Church and your circle you feel that you already have enough support and joy from all of them, but let me tell you this.

Stop acting angelic with the GBU to me anymore can?
I find it annoying now if after that GBU you never follow up with me whether how did God bless me.
Yes I know you are a good girl, in fact I will always tell people that you are one of the nicest human being I ever known, but then still I feel is quite hypocrite to act nice and you still give me the feeling that you are keeping yourself away from me.

Seriously, now a days.. there are so many "nice" girls out there.
But the one that are really nice...
Somehow camouflaging somewhere you don't see them, by the time you found them. You then realize that, the angelic girl you call her as very angelic, turns out to be not so angelic as you expected.

Do you still read my blog?

2011-11-21T02:26:00.002+08:00

You know I always wonder...
how is it that you will read my blog?

Among all the entries, you actually read the one that I called you a b*tch.
funny.

Part of me tells me that, no matter how much I feel that you no longer read my blog, I feel that you until today 2011 still continue to read them no matter what.

haha.. I don't know...

Anyway to you, you'll know who you are.

If your reading this, I think there are things I would really want to say it out here yo. BUT THEN... not sure am I writing to the air or not anyway.

Thoughts about the movie: 那些年，我们一起追的女孩 You are the apple of my eye

2011-11-20T01:38:00.006+08:00

那些年我们一起追的女孩 taught me many stupid things about this dumb girl.

The innocent looking smile with dimple angel~~ hahahaha

Although that main girl character 沈佳宜(Shen Jia Yi) [Sorry to all Jia Yi's in my friend list ><] is an angelic girl, study hard, good girl.. innocent, have nice smile But I feel she's a b*tch la!

1)
She claims that if the main guy character 柯景腾(Short form Ke Teng)
confess to her, she'll be happy. But that guy said it out loud, "Shen Jia Yi 我非常的喜欢你” But she was like POPOMAMA there holding him, and then in the end said that she likes the feeling of before a couple get together, cause when get together already the feeling different. Hence because of all these POPOMAMA thingy, they didn't end up together, plus during their fight they never TALK THINGS OUT.

2)
Idiot. When everyone was talking about dream, you know what she said?
"我没有为我的未来担心" and when her friend ask her, how's your response that many guys like you? she said "我觉得很幸福"
Kns, really like... WTH?? Girls like you surely la no need care of future la, just marry of a rich guy can already.

3)
男人不坏，女人不爱
Girls at young age will always love the bad and notorious boys because they are fun. Yet sometimes they will say they childish, but they just love it.
But at the end of the day, they just marry off rich guy and become a sexy milf.
=.=
She keep on saying the main character is childish, but HIS CHILDISHness is what she like.
That fatty, like her more too (as what the main character agreed upon)
But heck? she's just being that "dunno laa.. try la see how it goes girl"
KNS go die. I feel is like she's just fooling around with the fatty by dating him.

BUT!
Although those are the parts I dislike,
I do like a few scene.

1)
When that Jia Yi's good friend "WanWan" attend her wedding and said it out loud in "the gang's" table.
"HAHAHAHA last time you all don't kao me, u all always think of Jia Yi Jia Yi, now I duwan u all already laaa :P"

2)
When that awkward glance of smile by the main character to Jia Yi when she walk in with her newly wedded husband.

3)
The so called "Parallel Universe".

4)
How everyone will love this film ^^V

I agree that it can consider a good movie and I believe most people who watch this will love this. This movie will also get MORE upcoming awards!

But yea.. still some scene just make me feel so.. EWWWW....
at the end of the day almost every girl are the same.
Problems come don't want to talk it out.
But when got problem with their asshole bf, they force their asshole bf to talk it out, but the fact is their asshole bf just interested in bonking them. No talk, just sex :D

Until today there is still no love story that actually educate girls how to act properly on tough situations which requires them to talk it out.
It is always about, being the "IT" girl, being the popular girl, having the "cool" guy, "fun" guy.. and.. being with the guy that.. "I know he is a bad guy, but I love him and I'm willing to give him everything.." all those nonsense.
That girl although she didn't end up being those kind of girl, but you see the ending yo.. you see how she dated the fat guy, its darn obvious that she was just tagging along in convenience to "try out" the fat guy, and yes end up marrying that OLD uncle which is obviously rich.

In spite of all these, I will give this film a high rating.
Because there are some scene will make you laugh, there are some scene that I go like..
"OH YEAAA!!! here goes again~~"
n many more.

Guys bring your girl watch this, she'll love this, is like something you will enjoy watching with her over Twilight series.
Girls, bring your guy watch too and kiss them after the show. Feeling will be awesome :D

This are all STRICTLY my personal opinion,
my character is shape by things that I say and I know.
But as for today, THIS IS MY OPINION ABOUT THAT GIRL.

A blog post to God

2011-11-12T01:08:00.003+08:00

I dedicated this blog post, for once to the one and only God that I believe.
Today, 11/11/11 or 12/11/11
Is the day where things start to shake, I remember when I was 15 years old, I prayed out in my heart, and ponder about what I want to be when I grow up.
Somehow as how many people say I have a dream.... I dream/aspire to be....

So after a conversation with you, I've seen myself being somebody that will venture into Science field, to be a scientist that can do great stuff either be involve in creating/inventing/discovering something new for the society.
Even seen myself with that angelic innocent girl who is really nice but never even to bother to get along with me. Today, that girl also praising and worship and I believe have strong bonds with you day by day, and yes we're not even close like brothers and sisters, but in fact I have already made many other friends who care for me like I'm part of their family. That doesn't matter, I still feel glad to know that the girl is still worshipping you and doing things for your glory, even though we may not end up being GOOD friends, and my guess is she kinda avoid me until today although everything on the surface still look quite nice.

Ignore about the girl part, but lets look at that scientist part.
Yes, at that time I took the offer. Being confident with myself saying that
"I trust God will lead me through to be that scientist I want to be."
Every since that day, after PMR...
I got 4A's and lack of one to go pure science...
Initially I was discourage because I feel that I am lacking of one science knowledge to achieved my dream. Nevertheless, as I became Form 5 before leaving high/secondary school. I notice that YES, I AM IN THE RIGHT PATH.. and it was YOU, Lord who was there to lead me to the path that You know that I would like...

Engineering. Scientist. Ya Engineering uses science too!
Which suits me because Scientist's job is to discover the NATURE of science, and Engineer APPLY the science that has been DISCOVERED by scientist.
THAT'S SOMETHING I LIKE!!
At least I don't need to go wonder aimlessly and so on, I just have to APPLIED what has been discovered and then try to DISCOVER more to improve if necessary.
And there exist the Engineering field which I really love which is to be in the field of Digital/Electrical/Electronic related machines that can help improve the technology of mankind.

From that day onwards, my ambitions of being an Engineer stick like a glue with me until today where I'm age 22.
What am I currently doing?
I'm doing my degree course in Mechatronics Engineering, and I wanna SHOUT IT OUT AND SAY THANK YOU LORD. You MADE IT HAPPEN.
I've did badly in Maths during Form 6, and still able to go in to this degree by repeating the Foundation course of the uni.. and made it through like so easy although I didn't get A's.
Through it all... I made it to Year 2!
Learn the things that I like!
See things that I like!
But haven't really become that person that I want to be. and yes...

I've meet an obstacle Lord.

This is the moment that I truly seen it.

My results are not that good to prove to people that I really love it,
and it is still my true weakness that I am NOT GOOD in academics yet.
I haven't find a way to EXPLOIT it yet.
I know academics is all about hard work you sure make it.
But to be honest, is hard to actually really be like how those crazy hardworking people to really sit down and study everyday.

Yes, just last semester, I truly see why some people can treat their studies as it ain't that hard as I thought..
Is because they approach them differently... and how did they make time for it?
Well they perhaps found their own method that work on them to make sure that they do their work with a JOYFUL heart and understand like water.

I've failed my Maths 2 twice.
It is Maths that I am failing.
Maths has been my weakness too.
Now this time it is here to haunt me twice.

But you have let me know the right people, the right way, after my failures.
The right people showed me the right way how to see things different and differently.
The right way came to me and I don't know whether I am on it or not.
Haha...

I tell people, why I want to be an Engineer.
I said it is my passion.
In my heart I tell myself that because I want to be somebody that can help others in future, not only with money, but also with the TECHLOGY of my work, my effort.
I want to be in a R&D team!
I want to research and made something out of the field that I am into.
All it all the reason why I am in Engineering line is because I know that through engineering, I can be that person that inspire the ones like me.
Who want to bring a new Iphone or Ipad or whatever new cool gadgets to earth that people needs.
This dream made me smile when I think of it.

But after failing maths twice,
loan got affected.
Till makes me feel that there is one thing that will just destroy such dream.
MONEY.

I've been told that yes, engineers will not make as much money as those other $$$ business out there.
I've been told that why you not good in this course and yet you still continue, and yet your not showing RESULTS? Why not give up and study some easier course and do some other things?
I've been told that if engineering is not earning much, you definitely won't want to be an Engineer.
I've even been told that at the end of the day, your just getting a degree which not guarantee you to get fortune.

Yes is true, Engineers somehow at the end of the day will end up being controlled by businessman.

And yes there are other jobs that earns you big bucks which you no need to study so hard for it.

But still.. why is my dream to be an engineer?
Because I really want to be THAT engineer..

I not only want to be an Engineer.
I wan to be that engineer that can get involve with R&D
I want to have MONEY, to inspire people who have the same dreams as me, I want to help them and guide them too.
I want to be that Engineer that can design something that the WORLD NEEDS.
I want to be that Engineer that can design something that can HELP people.

Lord, I pray that..
You'll help me make it.
Not only as an Engineer,
but also make sure there is MONEY...
that I can declare financial freedom,
to survive, to feed family to travel.
from there only I can research in peace, without worrying of money to do my research.
and also for this round, guide me to complete this course,
give me the wisdom to complete this.
Thank you for still keeping me in my Uni instead of getting terminated, I still have ONE LAST try.

I want to make it.
No more excuses.

I know that being an Engineer may be like what others said, people will make more than you,
but lord I just hope but some other ways you can show me some ways to make that money to sustain myself if any, or perhaps way to successfully design something engineering related so that it sells and then I can move on to R&D in peace.

These dream will be a naive dream if I don't make it, people will say I'm not realistic. But in this prayer I pray that I think what I need most is courage, strength, wisdom, will and money to go on.

There are MANY people out there who graduates as an Engineer, but they didn't end up being an Engineer.
But I want to end up as an Engineer.
The truth is as humans, without money, we will tend to look for it and most of the time give up our dreams for it.
I want to be a successful engineer and help others to live their dreams too.

In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

Hello Angel~

2011-10-08T02:44:00.003+08:00

Today I just notice that your pretty good with arts in terms of drawing and designing,
know what? Xue was also the same thing...
Both of you love make up so much that now I get the idea why you did your make up really well, is because you have the ability to draw quite well.

I'm happy to be able to see the designing side of you,
this is not my first time, but this is the first time that I realize that.. yea....
you actually can be good at it.

But angel,
there's something that I guess is quite inevitable..
sometimes when you are not feeling good, you will just blow off and not seeing what I intended to say, and then you say I don't understand.
But the thing is well there are things sometimes you missed out, but if I ask more you will get angry. Sigh.
But glad there after that things are alright.

I do not have the skill to make you happy all the time, because I'm human.
But what I wish is that I hope you know that the reason why I want to ask, or mis-said wrong things, through it all I want to know... what you are so angry about.
Once I know, I'll do my best to help you ease your anger be it by accompany you, or hopefully find out the best words to say to you.
I now get why people will say that doing all these ler "guys will think is annoying and mafan" but for me... I feel that the ultimate solution for this is just give you a hug and ask you.. "ok tell me whats the matter, and we'll figure it out okay?"

Well that may be naive, but o well.. that only could happen if the day comes where you become my soulmate :)

But oh well, I guess in your heart, you know that I will be the one that will go through the bad moods with you, I'm happy :)
Because... just as you made me happy, I want to make you feel the same too.
This comfort, if you actually acknowledge it, will be there until I won't be available anymore.. but as long as I'm always with you, this is something I could always do as you treat me like ur brother.

I may never fully understand you, but I feel that.. is a joy to know more and more about you. I don't know how much will I get to know about you, or will I have the chance to be by your side always, but I feel that I should be glad that our understanding between us will develop as time goes on as both of us keep the will that we will stay true and loyal to one another. :)

Your Company is much appreciated

2011-08-29T00:52:00.002+08:00

If I had a wish now, I want it to be that you are always physically with me so that we could accompany each other in many things.

Again.. if you are reading this again,
I want to say that I really do enjoy your accompaniment as always,
think for now, is only you I felt this closest with, referring to someone I like :)

Is our busy month, I'll miss you.
You have your project I have my finals.
After this I don't know WHEN will be your nice timing xP

But lets move on to the point here,
I want to write this down, cause this feeling will ONLY be happy only on one condition.

Which is.. you are happy that the one that you fell in love with is nice to you and both of you are still as good as it is.

Care for each other naturally,
Developed a mutual understanding with each other till ALTHOUGH don't talk for a period of time but our hearts are closely connected,
Always look forward to the day when we really meet up and do something we both like..

I only can feel this when the good times are happening, never the bad times.
So I won't know my ending tho, but always in my mind, I hope that someday you'll be my soulmate.

-Then you'll be the one accompany me to watch movies and discuss about it, whichever movies it may be~~
-Play Ps3 Xbox or whichever gaming console out there available, then it would be really funny to see you react on certain things, probably we'll be shouting here and there.
-Accompany you shopping to shop for your stuff, and then I'll hear from you how you tell me which product you like and why you want to buy this and all that.
-Playing music instrument having you by your side while changing the music one by one, play it like non stop, play those songs that I like, you like and we like :D
-Understand your interest besides cosmetic stuff, and same goes for you.. if that ever happens to be you will try to understand from me.

Ya, I know is so ideal.
But o well, I guess that's what blog are for, you express it for people to read it.
This is something I want to say in a close public area... xD

Surprisingly, when you spend time with me talking many many stuff~~
Your the first who actually made me see all these.

I see that when the time you accompany me, you sure buat funny funny pattern, as compare to the rest, I only see that they will just accompany like normal.
Your the only one who made me feel that, whoever will be with you, if he is like as active as me, you and him will be like wacko~~~ hahaha

I like that tho..

That is my entry on how I see it when everytime you spend your time with me.
I want to be by your side for the rest of my life.

They always say when you found someone who's like you is a blessing

2011-08-16T03:02:00.002+08:00

Today after you talk to me about your interest in video games,
gives me the feeling that ya is nice that somehow if we are TOGETHER there are more things that we could do together.

I want to play video games with you :)
But you know how's that possible ma?
That would be possible if you ever thought of being with me, then we can try all sorts of games and keep trying them out one by one.

Aihhh, my friends tell me ya good for you, you found someone that would potentially be the right one for you.
But they didn't know that how much I would fear to see that we can no longer be this close anymore.

For the record, you still hold the record of someone that I am in love with that would want to know me this much.
Is just too bad, we are physically not with each other. =)

I want to be with you, and I wish the remaining of my life I will be spending with it with you.

I am already in love with you already, is just the matter of time where you will really know. All you already did.

Is not fun to be in love anyway, because it makes me feel this happy feeling that makes me always wish that I would end up being with you, and think of all those possible good times could possibly happen.
So what? How could I ever be happy anyway if I have to always tell myself that for now I didn't tell it to you, so things will go fine, but once if I let you know and somehow you can't accept it things will turn sour till we're just like strangers?

Who said when you found someone perfect for you is a happy thing anyway?
I'm not being pessimist.
I'm just writing it out to express that I hope I won't see it happen again.
You are someone close to me, can I confess to you and worst come to worst we still be close no matter what happen?

But somehow this time, when it comes to you, my mind never even bother to even want you as friend, but rather straight to the point where I want you as someone who will be with me for the rest of my life, my soulmate :D
Is the same feeling as otpy :)

Why?
Because we have develop so much understanding on each other I'm suppose....

Know sometimes I wonder yo, have you ever thought of that in a few years time I'll be with you till the rest of our life?
I like to be with someone that I'm close to first, not sure about you but I'm sure somehow you would agree too, at least each time if we fight we could give each other the signal to stop fighting first and calm ourselves down.
We can understand each others interest better and be part of it, like if say you enjoy someone accompany you to shopping, I won't mind anyway.
Then we go scout for nice yummy food here and there.
and many more....

Distance may be an issue for now, what's more is that I'm in no state to actually take care of you anyway right?
But know what? I will work my way to make it happen if all only if you believe in me and want that to happen too :)

I really hope by end of this year, I'll be able to see you in person.
But I still have no idea at all how am I going to make it, you always joyfully ask me to come, feels like o well I guess I am someone to you :)

Glad to be that person :)
I want this happiness to last.

Potentially someone way perfect for me :)

2011-08-05T01:05:00.005+08:00

Am I really blinded as always or what?

Today after a short conversation with you, I feel...
different.

You always know how to talk to me, as in if you feel that okay you find this topic @@ you will just straight tell me "okay, I'm in the @@ mode now, so can't talk about all this", I mean I feel is pretty rational.

You even know what's on my mind to, some people can tell me is simple, but then you know which inside joke that we can talk about with me, and haha I don't know, for once I feel that I wish to always talk to you like this forever, and yes I really want that the person I spend my whole life with is with you.

I don't know how you see in me, or what you see in me,
I feel that it would be the nice that you'll feel the same too :)
Do you?

According to the law of society, they say that the guy should be the one to make the girl feel the way how the guy feel for them if the guy have feelings for them.
I wish to...
But is me who just feel that, I want to have the ability to take care of you first only I'll do that, I don't want to be that sweet talker and just select words.
Best thing is, somehow my instinct tells me your not that type of lady.

To you, you dislike sweet talking.
As I know you probably receive them most of the time anyway,
you told me I am different, and cause of that we became close.
But does that differentness in me makes you wanna spend your rest of your life with me?

Because I would find it a joy to develop more inside jokes with you,
develop the interested to know what's your interest in and be interested it with you, and hopefully you'll try to be interested in my stuff too.
Accompany you to do the couple stuff, and so do you.
Feels nice though...

and yes.. of course I believe one of the thing that does make you feel happy is,
if I develop a good relationship with your parents too :D
If that is even possible.

From all of them, I felt a huge difference in you compare to others.
You know what it is?
Is you know how to actually focus your energy and just somehow not to react with a girly logic, girly reasoning with me.
Even though you will react the way how girls react, you would still tell me that straight to the point, this is how you feel, and I'm letting this for you to know.

Nah, is just too rare that a girl will react this way if they don't feel right with someone.

I don't know if you ever read my blog anyway, cause I remember I gave you my link before, but I didn't frequently ask you to check it out nor put in my msn :P

You always try to think outside the box, and I've rethink this over and over again comparing with the rest, there is one who is also closest to you, but I think for now.. you champion already.

Although you may not impress me on how smart you could actually think out of the box, but I just like your perception on how you view things will eventually make you think out of the box if I am with you someday...

It really does feel that your are different,
being close with you always make me happy like a fatty hamster.
I think I would say the happiest :)
Because I think... you not only allow me to freely express myself, as I always mentioned here.. is the assurance you gave me.
This assurance made me feel comfortable, and I want this comfort as always.

How you make me smile, you make me REALLY REALLY SMILE.
Hey there the only woman who made me feel this way,
if you were reading the previous entries till now...
I really hope it doesn't make you feel that you should step back and then act along very nice if you read this and you don't feel the same though.
I've already seen it in front of my eyes how confessing the truth will affect things between us.

I know, there are signs that I should read and all that,
but I feel that, I'm not the best form I am to just confess to you though. :)
Because I not only want to tell you that I really love you and I want to be with you.
But rather.. I want to spend the rest of the life with you, and I want to take care of you.

Sounds serious, and I don't know, apparently people say girls will freak out because they always want things casual first balbalbalblablabla
But for me I feel, what the heck?
If you love, stick to your words and mean it.
I'm sure you know where I'm heading.

Because woman, if you love me, I know I will be contented, because truly you understand me the most according to my records. xP
You understand me because you bother to know more about me... You went to the extent till you even can repeat what I've just said which WILL be irrelevant for most girls :D. Then again you know what makes me happy and what makes me sad, even bother to know my habits and so on.
I want to say this for eternity.
and I want to do the same to understand you too.

As for now, I still haven't really know your past,
but let me tell you.. no matter who you are, back in the past,
I know this feeling won't change.
Because that is my speciality that makes all of them want to avoid me,
once love will go forever unless on circumstances where I'm force not to love you like you want me to stop liking you.

Today I've heard a quote from a radio station,
It states that "Before a person like you, that person got to feel that you are like that person"
So which part of my feels that I'm like you?

For me, I feel that, your not like me, but rather you like to extract interesting things in me and then make it valuable.
Trust me, if you were to be with me wherever I go...
We will be able to make the whole world smile =)

My 22nd birthday entry specially for you

2011-08-02T20:45:00.004+08:00

Before writing this, if any readers who actually wish me, yea thank you so much.

Alright now is time to write about how you made my day.
Yes, I am touched, very indeed. In fact I wish to accept this touched feeling and be way more touched :D
But then, ya I just somehow don't want to be so hurt too.

Because being very happy with it, will results me being kinda sad if you and I will end up like how things were with all of them.

I wish next year.. I'll still have you to wish me like this, and I will be able to celebrate with you on your birthday although you are far away.

Sigh, I am happy yet I'm sigh-ing...
That shouldn't be la.

But ya, I want to remember this moment, just as how you express it all to me that I think you want to remember it too right?
I don't know.. this is for the first time I feel that, it is you who wanted to remember this memory, because you were more excited than I am, you actually plan something small for me with a jolly tone.

I've heard that tone before too, makes me can't help but to just smile :)
You prepared a simple picture for me with a cute caption, calling me with that name and of course with my middle name with a double syllabus.
Haha... so funny la, you always think of something new to make me just laugh about.

and then 2 days later, u called me just to sing "Happy Birthday" song to me..
and ya, first song I've ever heard from you.
You tell me la, how can I not be happy?
In fact.. I would wish to hear it all over again and again xD

Ya, is been 2 years.
This is the year we became closer(I think).
You said, that you are happy to know me,
once told me before that although you live far away, but u will always worried and stand by me all the time.

Who will actually say that to me anyway?
Is only someone who acknowledge me as someone close to them, and mean someone to them. :)
Thank you.

I can never stop feeling "xD" when the moment u were singing it to me :)

Throughout this year,
you were there, most of the time, when you always laugh at me when I emo of stupid stuff which make me can't help but to feel emo about it, even with many many self control and all.
You did make sure I'm alright then only u hang up, you make sure...
you hear my smile only you feel delighted.
Even that time when you sing the birthday song to me, it felt that way too.. feels like you actually wanted to sing this with all your heart, just to made my day.

Is been long time since I feel this anyway :)

Thank You Woman,
my this year's birthday do not have any special celebration.
But you made a moment for me to remember.. for life =)

Will this memory will always made me smile?
It always depends on what happen.. NEXT.
in the future..........

A reason to be happy

2011-07-19T01:28:00.004+08:00

Hey you..
Now everytime when I think back, I'm still vulnerable to it though.

But now, when I still feel how it affect me again, I think of you, and somehow that thought could fight back itself.
It is not you who actually made me stop thinking about it.

It is thinking how you endlessly would want me to not let me affect by it,
=) it was your effort to try find the reasons why it make me feel this way.

Thank you.

I don't know will I still have this in the future, but as for now.
Ever since you implanted something in me, I think I will be stronger.
This entry is written to remember that you are still that sunshine to me.

I would wish to tell people that it is because I see the genuine side of you to try figure out what's wrong that makes my day.
If this will forever last......

Happy to know you,but....

2011-07-15T15:34:00.003+08:00

Emo title, emo feel. Whatever it is.. I think I'll just blog it out like how I would always do.

This not really an emo post, but to express how I feel.
Blogging is about expressing how you feel, so shall I express how I feel here.

I shall then dedicate this entry to you.

It has already been 3 years, I never thought I'd be someone close to you tho.
Apparently in these three years, the first year wasn't any special, as we just talk only a few stuff and then go off.

Then again as usual, we became closer in a NORMAL USUAL way of how people get close with each other, by chatting more, and most importantly, open up ourselves more in front of each other. :)

Yea, I like opening up and dislike hiding who I really am.
But I've learned that it all depends on the person, if that person treats me as a human being, surely I will open up a lot. If that person treats me like some alien from outer space, thinking that "Oh my, what on earth is this being is talking anyway, so odd one?" surely and eventually I've be dull and bore them and eventually everything dies off.

You made me realize that you know?

You actually respond towards a certain character of mine that actually don't exist in most guy, you actually try digging out all interesting things about me as time goes on...

You made me realize that... Yup, my uniqueness worth more than any gold on earth nor way more priceless than Master Card advertisement.

What could I ask more? You even set a goal for me from time to time :)
It makes me feel motivated everytime when I think about it.

I couldn't ask more...
and is been recently I feel that you have already mastered the way to cheer me up.
I don't know how u figure out, but u find it and most of all you do it.
You even reassured me many things, which make me pause and smile for a second.

I am happy for being able to know you,
No doubt that I wish to declare that you are the perfect one for me :)
But knowing that are many factors to consider which is me, I can't.
Because the first question is always.. am I your perfect one too?

Because if I'm not.. declaring it will only hurt me more and more, as I know you will then react differently if I declaring out loud.

I remember months back, as we became closer and you came exploring more of me.
I knew somehow I'll be even deeply in love with you.

And I know... that when I really love, I really do, I know I can love you all the way easily. But so what anyway?? I don't want to fall for someone where I will have to then kill the feeling off with force.
Furthermore, you should know what are the obstacles for me anyway..
The only way I'll know I won't hold back is when the day you tell me that you see even more in me, and believe that someday I'll make you mine.

Otherwise, I'll just remain like this..
and blog yearly to express how contented am I to have you with me until today.

Thank You woman, you'll be the first female that I'll recognize as a WOMAN, that spark me up like a star. :)

I love to blog about emo stuff

2011-07-07T13:33:00.001+08:00

Because blogging about emo stuff makes me feel better to be honest,
I just want to write it out, let it out in the so called "www".

But nevertheless, blogging emo stuff, actually makes u feel more emo because you'll always resort back to emo-ing the same thing over and over again.

Aihh, emoness,
why won't u just go away or never exist?

Is been a long time since I blog about my emo stuff already, but anyway, my emo stuff are always about the same thing.
I always face the same kind of fucking emo stuff, tht sux but I'll say that yeaaa busyness does keeps me away from it.

But everytime before I sleep, where I want to rest my mind a while, I'll think back...
Think back of what causes that emo stuff to happen and all that,
and yea, I'd always wanna blame so much till it never ends.
Tired, and then I'll go to sleep.

That's how it is.

Whatever it is, I do see a happy way towards to emo stuff.
I'm sick of it, and I'll work towards a solution to it.
Will I succeed, I don't know, but it does make me sick to see what makes me sad.

This is the year...

2011-06-20T01:31:00.003+08:00

After 5 years from leaving secondary school,
this is the year where I will be exposed to something that I've been longing for.

Transition of being somebody that I really wanna be.
Hehe..
I seriously hope that this time I'll achieve it regardless of shits happening around.

I need to sacrifice a lot of things because of academic reasons,
and to those who had been there for me all the time, thanks a lot.
All of you has always been my motivation to go on in my life to ensure that someday I'll return to all of you with a surprise after my transitions.

Sadly, not all are with me though...
But whatever it is... when time comes, I think I'll have to do something. @@

Till then.
I hope to share my life stories when I've been through all of it.
Still not in the time where I can blog it all yet.
UNLESS I have a blog writter who will help me to write out everything.

Nothing changed I guess.

2011-05-09T04:01:00.002+08:00

There are a lot of stories of mine that I won't mind sharing,
but I always never bother find time to blog about it.

Think the only time where I feel like blogging is when I got an inspiring stories to post up or feeling emo cause of stupid reasons.

So here's an update for people who sincerely followed my blog.

O surely there are changes in me, and some character still stays.
and.. lets see..
Currently is exam season and I don't feel good, and I dislike it.

I really wish that I will go inside the exam hall and enjoy doing the exam questions.
Is been a really really long time since I felt this way.

I want to make it happen and then write it out in my blog and inspire others too. =)

Alrite I think that's all, will share more some other day.

Letters to you.

2011-04-16T20:32:00.005+08:00

Hi there TPY,

Once again I'll start off with the same old boring introduction.
I don't know will it reach you, but I think for once I should be optimistic to believe it should reach you.

One of the reason why years back then I was so freaking sad where you just have to "don't want to have anything to do with me" was because I know that how many years later or what, I will always still have this sense that I am here to know you, and have a certain care for you.
I don't know how you view this, if you want to say that I don't move on then go ahead.

I am actually replying to your blog entry where you said how your blog stat drop.

The reason why I got sad is because I always tell myself that if we are still friends, probably many things would have been different. I would be still wishing you on the phone, have a heart to heart talk with you and all that..

But heh, is a funny thing...
After many years, I feel that the more you try to avoid me, the more I know MORE about you.

TPY,
honestly speaking, we aren't really that close before I actually confess to you, and before I crazily go post out to public cause you made me can't get hold of myself of it. So to be honest, you the one and only girl that is not even close to me that I really like BEFORE.. see arr got the BEFORE there, not now.

You were the one who listens to my story, and everytime when is your turn to tell me yours, you didn't. OTHER THAN the Handsome Boy story. hehe..
You sux la PY, people already go for another girl much prettier than you, much sweeter than you, much party type like you.
I am saying it in a friendly manner like how your good friend tease you, but most likely you going to feel damn insulted, but o well.. for this time I shall say..
Just try and see it that way, IF YOU CAN.

I remember at that time, many times already I tried talking to you about other stuff, tried to create a joke by chatting with you..
many many stuff la I do, to just to get to really really know you.
Well at that time I like another girl remember?
Yea at that time horr, I never actually thought that we could become close, and then later on I thought that okay slowly can see it coming, but STILL in the end..
WE ARE NOT CLOSE. Hehehe..

Is really disappointing to know that everytime when I talk to you right, you will go like =.=, oh, okay, I see.
I remember.. I complain it to you before..
Then you were defensive, you go like..
"We got nothing to talk about."

You know, as time goes by, where I used back the same method to talk to others,
it turns out that, those QUESTION I've ever ask you that was suppose to get to know you BETTER turns out to be one of a good question to get along with the friends?
From there, if the person answer it, it can start to develop a topic and BOOM!
Can chat till tomorrow.

I didn't understand that at all,
until when I learned the skill to open a portal and WARP into your mind.

The fact is...
to you..
I am just a Shung Jiu that never shines, plain, dull and boring..
But the best of all is, it seems that I always see through your move all the time.
But back then, you have a lot of supporters to support you, that's why it always seem right in YOUR WAY, but I always have that special eye that see's things differently.

You can deny that I don't stand out among your friends, is alright.
But well today I'm here to say...
I am the Shung that is different from the rest of the human beings in the world.
One of the reason why God chose to let me know you is to have a good purpose.
I am able to see how things can go in a way that if say right now you are my good friend, then how I will actually bring those happy and good stuff to you.
Same goes for you to bring the happy little things to me.

Is ok that you can't see that.

I tell you la,
remember how you said I humiliated you?
Think and see properly.

If say at that time you were to be your good friend that we have heart to heart conversation often, do you think I will blog out everything?
Think and see la?
Because at that time I remember the most was...
PY don't care at all, why should I care.

Cause I thought about it now that.. any close friend of mine, I could always hold back for them. Hold back till I'll be a noob willing to submit to everything.

To be honest, I think I really know how to make you feel really happy. =)
The clue is actually simple, I find out that I actually work by if you make me feel happy, I can use all those happiness and convert it into something that will make you feel EXTRAORDINARY happy.
Things I do back for you, always have this theme.
"This reflects who you are to me."

Turns out it always turns out that way, after you left.

Anyway I'll end this long entry here PY, for now I don't even wanna care what you decide to do about it la..
I won't find you and talk about yeaa lets reconcile and so on.
Cause if is never in your heart that you want things to be alright, it won't be alright. Is a two way thing girl, I can be the only person here to like forever stay here and say "Is ok PY, I believe someday we'll be friends again."

I still have more things to say you know, but I think I'll say it in some other ways.

Until then, you'll forever be the girl whom I may reach easily but avoids me.
Funny description, but is okay..

I got used to it, and I feel is kinda funny, but I think I finally know how to play along with your stupid games. :D

But I will try my very best to not use harsh words okie?

I'm not emailing this to you to avoid you having the chance to delete this.
Unless you can confirm to me that you read every mail I sent to you.

I like it how you tam me :)

2011-03-07T01:57:00.002+08:00

Haha.

Right now I don't know why am I in the mood to write all these, but I think I just want to write.

Tam..
hahaha...
A tam like this right, can make my night, not day..
Because when I'm sad during the day, I still can go play game or do my stuff do be alrite.
Thinking about your tam can make my night is when I'm about to sleep that time...
where I think about my DAY or I'm ending my day with a smile of your tam.

Tired laa...

I'll never understand why such tam will never last forever.
I believe you do not know how a simple tam can actually change things.
It make a lot of different.

Is not ok that I don't have it anymore.
but I have to tell myself is ok, and.............

Oh whatever~~
I guess you'll never know, moments with you means the most to me in my time of living :D

Already 5 years d, do you know that?

2011-03-06T02:47:00.006+08:00

Hello there,

Haizzz I don't know what's the best way to contact u anyway.
ZZZZZ Guess I'll just have to write it here.

If I MSN, probably got chance that u AFK and DC and never see.
If I sms, u'll don't really bother, and then forget the content then delete.

That is why I feel one of the best way to speak your hearts out is using blog.

That is why I guess, it didn't stop me from blogging when we were 17.

So how shall I address you with a code?
Let me see.. errmmm you are same age with me, birthday on October 4th.
U address me as your "stalker" or whatever you can call me. =.=

So what I wanna write ler?
Simple only...

I also don't understand wei..
I went and meet your guy, you came and message me in msn and tell me you don't believe that I did that. and then half way disappear. =.=

I ask you laa?
If you were me how you feel?

SMS you, then you didn't say anything, means what?

So why did I really want to meet your guy?

5 years back,
I told God that there's no way you will ever bother about things relating to your faith in Him anymore, so don't ask me to standby.

Cause.. crazily AGAIN, I was like kinda told to actually "standby" for you just in case. =.=

I REFUSED SO! and I kinda like challenge back to God.

Turns out, things happened the way I thought that it wouldn't happen and...
You say how you'll feel if you were me?

When we were 19 or 18 I forgot..
you broke off with the one that I lost to, and I stupidly go to you and ask as if you were alrite and you just avoid it from me and say "Is alrite"
But after that when you get back to him, you also mou diao me..

Yes, at that time I also tell God.. using the HEART TO HEART communication.

"SCREW IT LAA!! WHY SHOULD I BOTHER ANYMORE LAA... this standby shitz is shitz!"

5 years later..
I found out that things are happening what the way where I thought God won't make it happen.

You say this time will you move or not?

He(your guy) told me, you two(you and your current guy) were praying about many things ler?
I as Shung Jiu, you think laa.. I will just stand there and don't bother meh?

I gave you the first bible,
try to stupidly attempt to tell you about God with my RIDICULOUS IDENTITY that you defined me, and I still thought that ok.. I know you still can see me as a friend, but, no =.=
I told myself that I must finish this...
I told myself that for you must make sure at least horr give the last thing I could...

Say all these stupid nonsense horr.. you think am I in the position to pull back arr?
When now is the timing where I know that I could at least do something?
By letting him know a little more about you, so that he can understand you better?
Letting him know me, so in case IN THE FUTURE.. *you'll never know what good things may happen if we know each other*

And turns out that, yeaa..
I know now you two are in a critical stage.
As he told me that you two were praying hard for many things.

I kinda forget what are the detail I said 5 years back,
but I know the intention is something gotta do with..

I....
will be that support when the time comes again,
and I want to see it happen if that day comes.

Knowing that he's going to be a missionary,
why can't I as Shung Jiu show him that I want to use up my time to at least spent on him, to show him that support and encouragement?
Cause supporting him = supporting you.

So you see? The day has come, The time is now, Things I thought never come true it came true, and knowing that I could at least do a little thing as Shung Jiu...
You think I will just ignore it and go off?
That's not me :)

But what's on your mind I don't know.
So I'll just leave this entry here until you read it.
But whatever it is,
Haizz is oklaa if you don't understand,
is not like I found the Solution to make you understand or fix things between us anyway.

Afterall... is already been 5 years that we actually really meet up and talk to each other. Or in another words,you could actually see me as the Shung Jiu that you are comfortable with me and able to see me as the Shung Jiu that you KNOW that you'll enjoy spending time with him.

So I can't blame you much if you didn't understand, but instead continue to pray.

Dear... you..

2011-01-26T19:05:00.007+08:00

This is dedicated to you.. silently/loudly as you will know is you when you read this.
Only few of my mates will know who exactly you are.

I'll never understand anymore why is it so unfair, for me to try to be to good guy ending up being the bad one.. the one that you'll be hating so much.

Somewhere August 2010,
I totally forget was it this month or it was September, I've decided that since we are already close enough, that we just contact each other often, and errm I know you will be there for me and I will be there for you, I don't see the point that I shouldn't be honest with you about my feelings for you.

Confessing to someone that you have feelings for them is always a risky task to do,
I'm not bothered of being rejected as a lover, but what I'm always concern about is...
People whom I confessed to, will never remain as someone dearly to me no matter how I tried to hold it tight. That bothers me like some retard, but what could I really do anyway?

So always, I start off with something like..
"Today.. will be the last day you will see the me that is the me that you could you see"
Usually, they will go like..
"I had no idea what you talking about.."

Perhaps I will just tell them that,
Today will be the last day that you'll feel really happy to have me as that good buddy that you can count on, and I'm really really really thankful that I've know you =)
Are you happy too?

Then they'll get even curious like.. Oh WTH, just say it already la! What's with all this last day thing? Is not like I'm dying or is the end of the world right?

Yup, surely they'll say like that, cause they do not have the ability to see how things between us can end. Is not I want it to end, but it always END. Cause things will go AWKWARD if is not handle with care and from there they'll just hate me and will never acknowledge me as I am their close friend no matter what. NO IT WON'T.

So why I choose to confess it out instead of hiding it?

Because I feel that I have to be honest, and hiding the feeling is really pointless.
As I know sooner or later I will be jerky when come to many things, and all she could ever do is ask... "Why?"

Sure thing, that I can go on acting, and play along... and so on..
BUT THAT IS NOT SOMETHING I WANT TO DO!

I am willing to be the stupid one, to instead playing along and try to fish you into my confusion and instead of me feeling like there is tornado inside out of me, it should be YOU feeling it.

In modern terms, we should call it, successful courtship =)
I should plan my strategy well, like as if I'm going to go for a competition and make sure I win something that we call.. HEART <3. rescuing" you from your confusion, you are confuse.. and you are happy, unexpectedly telling you what you wanted to hear for a long time after being STUPIDLY CONFUSED and in the process of happy confusion. and then.. we get together.. "Is a FAIRY TALE!"
That's what you will said, but you don't know you are actually being trap in my dimension.

That's not something I want to do, because is something that I dislike to do...
But I guess is my mistake for not doing it, else things won't turn out this way...
Because I was just being too good by giving u the space, the respect, trying to be understanding, always have on mind that the purpose of me as Shung Jiu is to at least be one of the human being in ur life to make you really really happy, be it whatever identity I am.

I remember during somewhere in the month of June,
You share with me in a personal manner saying
"Shung Jiu, I have no feelings for him, what should I do? He gave me a lot of stuff."
There's another time was somewhere few days after your birthday, you said you were
not feeling comfortable with him posting images of both of you.

But I was there being kind as I could saying..
"Hey.. no worries, just be cool, and just let him know how you feel."
At that time, instead of trying to trick you to eliminate him, I just tell you to be good to others.

Turns out now, he's your at least close buddy, or more than that...
According to you, you said no there's nothing more than that, so I shall believe you since it comes from you then.

So he became closer to you, in return, I become the one that you turn out I slowly become the asshole that you might be hating. Then from there, I began to not understand anything at all but to question why?
I never expect much, but just as long as we remain as close as before, where you can just wish me a simple goodnight where I can sense ur smile in your messages.
This smile doesn't have to be a "I love you" smile, but rather a simple "I end my day with a smile as I know that is nice being close with you" kind of smile.

But nope.. is not what it is.

As days goes by, you were busy with your studies, I respect that, and I didn't bother to call you often or really disturb you. Somore at most of the time I most of the time ask you nicely, hey are you free now or something like that.. just like how a little boy ask the teacher "May I go to the toilet?"
Because I don't like it too if I were to bother you half way studying..

But I guess I was wrong in that, as I am very positive that most of the time when I didn't disturb,
he did. I think you probably didn't mind that, and I was there being a "guai zhai" goodie two shoes just not being annoying by only sending you a message or two for a day then I go off.
Does that ever came into your thought?

Well, I know.. he gave you more than what I could ever give.
Fine is alrite, not like I can afford. But even though I can't afford, I still give what I could really afford.. even though it may not be using monetary.
But I'm still here, always lending you a shoulder, still being that friend you can count on ..supposedly.
But nope.. you don't see it that way after each time I try to be honest with you.

I know that I say I am jealous, that is because I feel that you became closer to him and you never maintain our closeness.
I am jealous because.. I know for sure that you actually trust him more than me over the time..
I am aware of that, and I am TRYING my best not to feel this way okay? For your sake... cause I don't want you to feel that bad or what.
But seems like I think slowly by slowly... I am being ignored or push away, as you became closer to him.

So I then try to come out with solutions, for your happiness.
I again, being RETARDLY HONEST telling you...
alright, I'll train myself not to feel this way, okay?

Okay?? Alright?? Right??

...
......
........
...........

No reply.

So being honest to the friend that at the same time someone that I admire is ALWAYS A BAD IDEA.

From there, I think you became either don't know what to do, or awkward, or feeling unpleasantly.. I don't know...

Here comes the part, where you will start to push me around, hide here and there like a ninja,
and all I could ever feel was...

"Hey!! IT DON'T MAKE ANY SENSE AT ALL??"

=)

As it goes on, I can't take it.. then I get upset, then you'll get upset and say I think too much and so on...

Then~~~~~~~~

HERE COMES THE PART WHERE THE
JENG JENG JENG sound effect is played.

You WILL start to hate me in every single thing I do.

This is the part, where I can't casually call you, can't casually meet you up, can't casually do anything to really get along with you again like we always do.

That hurts me the most.

What's the best thing is, I even tell you..
"Hey, is ok to just let me know the truth, if you wanna go with him, just go.. I don't want to be the one that disturb the happiness of both of you."

YET!
You still can tell me.
"Nooo... dun worry, you'll still can kacau me :)"

Haha.. luckily I didn't really take it for real, otherwise I think I'll go crazy even more for what is happening right now.

Thanks for letting know my mistake girl,
I am really sorry for making you feel unpleasant towards me...
this shouldn't happen, as I remember I tried.. I tried.. all my best to ensure you don't feel it this way, but nope.. it seems that not even by explaining it in a long essay help, not even by being cool by chatting with you casually help, NOTHING EVER HELP!

My mistake was...

I didn't make you my girl by using the TECHNIQUE with high success rate to win your heart and confess to you and just magically turn you into my girl.

Using that technique will actually make you take back your words which is..
"Shung Jiu, I don't want to commit, sorry."

I'm sorry.

Because if that happens, non of this would ever happen when you became my girl.

Cause I know instead, you'll be telling people how great I am to you, what a loving person I am to you and so on..
instead of now...

Where I become that irritating guy, that evil man or whatever shit you can say about me.
Is unfair.

But anything la.

Since I didn't do it properly, is always my fault according to what that high success rate technique said.
Never expect being honest can end up like this.

You said you won't evade me if I don't do anything weird,
I didn't what..
I soh soh dei make sure that I don't disturb you, soh soh dei be there for you,
soh soh dei make sure that you won't feel unpleasent... END UP.

I soh soh dei kena like this from you.
If you think this is fun.. then carry on la.
I have no strength to bother much but to try to get a numb feeling towards it.

Sorry for not knowing how to really grab you properly by instead of me feeling this way, is another person who feel it.
Sorry for being the good guy that will always end up as the bad guy.

But you know what is the funniest thing?
No matter how you look at me as the bad guy, I will always have the ability to not look at you as the bad girl.
=)
That is a gift, and you've help me figure that out that I do have such ability.

Lastly.....
How can I be that friend if you can't look at me as that friend you would like to say...
"Thank You Shung Jiu :)" in the tone that we know it tells us we are happy for each other's presence? And again.. I soh soh dei.. trying my best to make things right for us, but I think the effort is always go into a waste..

I really don't know...

2011-01-17T03:08:00.002+08:00

I'm not thinking much, nor I am thinking less.
But if today is somewhere October 2010, I would have say different things to you.

If today is July 2010, If today is May 2010, If today is April 2010....

So what anyway? I'm glad and I know at times you are too.
Just that.. there is something I didn't do it right.

I do not have that skill, nor that ability.
So I shall just... witness what is ahead of me now..

Switching style of blogging.

2011-01-09T17:30:00.003+08:00

I think I really need to switch my style of blogging already,
I don't enjoy spending time sitting down and type out what I want to share to the world.

I always thought about using video, using audio, use other thing else to replace it,
but neither do I have anything yet to do it.
This is so boring...

Maybe I should take up some interesting stuff to blog about like contest to win some tickets.
Otherwise is like yerr.. no fun blogging.

Maybe is because.. I no longer like to share stuff publicly anymore?
Maybe is because.. I don't see the whole point of blogging?

I don't know.

But I do know that I like to share information to people and be in some kind of community.
But now.. I think that passion is gone but some parts of me still remains. :)

New Year Eve Entry.

2010-12-31T17:48:00.003+08:00

New Year is jz a few moments time,
It is good that humans celebrate new year by keeping it a holiday :D
At least we will have some time to reflect on ourselves.

I can predict what is going to happen ahead in a few hours time,
but.. errm nothing big anyway haha..
My new year never been so called magical before,
nope never.. lol

So I shall say that let it be just another day where you just follow the flow of your life.
Then the next or next two days we'll see.. what are the comings stuff ahead.

How time changes many things

2010-12-28T16:41:00.003+08:00

"Is funny to see how our life can just change with a blink of an eye"
That is just a typical quote you hear everytime..

Actually the thing is time doesn't change, is just a measurement define by people to keep record of events that happened, happening, and about to happen.
Past, present, future.

I think, we shouldn't always look on how time changes things and all but rather how we live our life that will change things.
Why I say so?

Because, assuming that we are all not moving at all, and time is changing in a sense that it is moving, nothing actually changes much :D

So I conclude here by saying, it is not time that is > than living being.
It is the Living being>time.

I know that, somethings, it takes time to grow, it takes time to learn and understand, it takes time for many cases...
But for that case, there is an explanation to it like
It takes time to grow, but actually if you look at it that time doesn't exist, you body will grow no matter what, you will stop growing if you STOP LIVING :D
It takes time to learn and understand things that you will have to learn, if time doesn't exist, you've learn, but if u STOP LEARNING, you will never UNDERSTAND.

So again..
Time doesn't really change things much cause it changes constantly without any signifacant meaning, is the changes in living thing that changes them more significantly :D

My First Favourite Rock Band: Linkin Park

2010-12-16T17:18:00.007+08:00

This is to dedicate to all Linkin Park(LP) fans out there.

Linkin Park Just rulez...

From left:
Mike Shinoda (the one that rap), Brad Delson(Lead guitar), Joseph Han aka Mr Hahn(the D.J/turntable), Chester Bennington(Vocalist aka the one that have the scream we love),Rob Bourdon(Drummer), David Phoenix Farrell (Bassist)

When I was standard 6, that was the age where I started to like listen to songs..
As in songs that got lyrics, songs that are in the mainstream media.

That was their first album art, Hybrid Theory, I use to misspell it as HyBIRD theory, because I see there is a wing there so which looks like an eagle bird.
Didn't know what hybrid means at that age..

So how I came to know about this band?
It was one song that I hear one guy keep on singing and somehow it appear on MTV and I think is like... WOOOOOOW why got shouting in the song one? Lets go hear it out.

The song is......... CRAWLING~~

I only love the shouting part where he sang CRAWLING IN MY SKIIIIINNNNN~~~
Hahahah and at that time most of my guy friend were like listening to Backstreet Boys, and all those pop-ish song. I was the only one who love the sound of this JEEEEENNNNGGGGG JEEEENGG JEEENG metal sound.

Guess what? Linkin Park was the FIRST CASSETTE and FIRST CD that I actually bought from the record store, ORIGINAL OKAY? I didn't buy the expansion pack for the first CD because they came out after their first album and I got no money.

That time when I bought in a cassette, my dad was like..
Gosh why are you listening to songs that sound soooo demonic.. hahaha
Which is their first song released I'm suppose

Every time when the time where they wanna sing the bridge part
"SHUT UP WHEN I'M TALKING TO YOU! SHUT UP!! SHUT UP!! SHUUUUUUT UP!!!!"
If my dad is nearby I will quickly fast forward it xD because the other song in their album was not as bad as this.

But little did I know, this song from Linkin Park become REALLY REALLY FAMOUS!

Which is...

IN THE END

This song is SOO AWESOME because is like rap+rock and a little of sentimental inside,
Cause usually anything that gotta do with ROCK HARD/Metallliiicaaa stuff
there is no soft part in the song, but this has it.

Because of this song,
when I was form 1, my friends make fun of me because I like this type of song which they deemed "CAN'T BE CLASSIFIED AS SONGS"
But after they hear this song, they came and find me and want to borrow my CD from me. =.=

Guess what?
Linkin Park does become more and more famous after then, I'm so proud of it :D

So the next album they came out was a REMIX of this album which is REANIMATION
This is like a more RAP style version of all of their song except for the remix of Points of Authority. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=60lmDCGgW9k
Other than that I don't recall hearing any Chester shouting out loud in here.

After that they came out with another MIND BLOWING ALBUM called METEORA

Sounds cool right?
Their famous song for this one is NUMB.

Well still I love it because they still have their half rap/half song.
Pretty much I learn about CHORD PROGRESSION is mainly influence by them.
Linkin Park love the CHORD PROGRESSION of starting with a Minor 1st key, Major 6th key refer to the first, Major 3rd key refer to the first then Major 7th refer to the first .

What varies is just the sequence.

AFTER THIS, they just team up with Jay-Z came out with COLLISION COURSE

"So WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU WAITING FOR?????"

So I believe the fans are wanting more and more from them, including me..
But things started to change when they came out MOMENTS TO MINUTE.

They only have like one or two songs where Chester is screaming.
As we know, again the famous song for this album will be WHAT I'VE DONE.

L.P never fails to have CATCHY tunes, there is where I learn from them too.
Furthermore I just love their beat sometimes, or transition during the bridge.

This song What I've done do not have Mike Shinoda singing, which kinda disappoints me.
Never the less, this WHOLE ALBUM we fans can somehow know that the STYLE of Linkin Park seems like changing.
Chester seldom SCREAMS and L.P no longer give a horrific effect anymore,
okay I can see the band is changing image, in fact they have nice songs like this.

Leave out all the rest. Sentimental gao gao.

So from What I've Done, it gives me the impression that Linkin Park wants to sing songs that are related to War and Forgiveness and so on..
Is no longer anger, or frustration.

But who cares? As long as I can FEEL the LP is good enough.

So they came out with a SIMILAR song for TRANSFORMERS 2 theme song,
New Divide

Imagine knowing that your FAVOURITE BAND is having a theme song for the COOLEST MOVIE in town?
How cool the feeling is?
The movie that everyone waits, having this song also make me can't wait to watch it xD

Now their latest album is...
A Thousand Suns

Which the song that they promote is..
Catalyst

Now I first hear this song on a radio speaker, I felt like soooo.. Ewwww~~~~~
Why will Linkin Park new sound will sound like some Pariaaaaa Techno Song?
Furthermore when I view it on youtube, all I see is Chester non stop singing without a break, is like.. God bless us everyone, we're a broken people under the loading gun blablalalbablablalblala....

o.O

What is this???

Today I don't know what's with my mood, I came to realize that I didn't hear their whole album.
Kinda miss them, so I went and check out the whole album.

Turns out,

WOW THE STYLE IS CHANGED??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

I mean how you gonna accept that they use to have, Chester SCREAMING, Mike Shinoda doing the rap, and Mr Han with all the disk Scratches and so on...
THE NEW ONE NO MORE??!!?!?!?

So I google for some answers, turn out that not only me who agrees on this, MANY OTHER Linkin Park fan out there also realize this too.

So What's my conclusion?
According to this http://mikeshinoda.com/2010/09/27/haters-and-the-converted-a-thousand-suns-album-release/
Mike said he is focusing on the message and trying out new things, and yes he KNOW that is gonna be WAAAAAY different.

Well I do pity those who bought their album and was DISAPPOINTED,
but oh well for me I would say I think the idea is good maybe some songs were not appealing when you FIRST HEAR IT.

I try hearing CATALYST again on a better speaker, turns out that I can hear a lot of catchy beats, and of course the bass, and errmm the percussion?
Hahaaha but yeaa this song is meaningful

IT WAS CHOSEN AGAIN for some famous game Medal Of Honor~~

So for those people who dislike and unhappy about the new album,
don't be disappointed, because I do believe that they(Linkin Park) have already heard our feedbacks, so lets just hope for a REMIX for A Thousand Suns.

Or maybe their NEW ALBUM :D

Linkin Park still RULEZ, try to HEAR the content of their music, maybe you can do a remix for them instead? :D

I SINCERELY HOPE THAT LP NEXT ALBUM WILL BE BETTER THAN THIS.
I hope there is still Chester screaming as usual, Mike Shinoda Raping, and still categorize as ROCK. This is my first rock band lei~~ I don't want it to become another type of Genre already.

If next time they come Malaysia again, hopefully I'll make sure I go for their concert.
I miss their one and only concert in Malaysia :(
That time no cash still Secondary School Boy.
Chester DOESN'T scream like a DEMON, he scream with a MELODIOUS HARMONY~~~~

First impression.

2010-11-23T17:22:00.011+08:00

Lol.. it is interesting to know people's first impression on you.
Coz.. usually as we develop our friendship the first impression will always be like one of the most interesting topic to talk about.

This is not a rant but rather something like a Frequent Ask Question blog entry.

The reason why I wanna blog about this is because I find that.. people always have a wrong first impression on me that after they know me for some time they will go like.
"Hey! You like that too?" or.. "Wow! I didn't know you are like that."

At times, I do feel not so happy about people's first impression about me.
But I know I know.. that sometimes is just can't help it as most of us see things as what it is.

So as far as I know what kind of impression I do get that somehow don't really match with me.
First of all, based on my physical appearance.

This is dedicated to those young looking guys out there who look younger than your age due to our physical appearance like teenager only.

This is a cincai me.

I look younger than my age, below average physique, most importantly underweight! :O
So the first impression people use to always have is like...
"You don't look at your age", they usually try to indicate me that I don't look mature enough, in another words I can't handle things well. =/ Or the more powerful word that can hurt a guy.. Not man enough.

So I always come out with an intelligent answer is.
"Humans grow old, never grow young, it is good to look young."

But then, hah I think for guys, the older they look the better, just don't look like grandfather can edi.
But for girls, if they forever look like kid also doesn't matter :D

Already say I very young nevermind, but yet they see me like underweight again they wanna rub the salt by saying...
"You should eat more". But the fact is that, I love sports, I don't eat less than an average guy could eat and.. what the heck I am not physically weak as what you people think?
People see my size like that, a lot of things they always THOUGHT I can't do physically.

It kills my esteem, but... I do know I can run a marathon with a performance better than most Malaysian's Men.
I know for my size with that height and weight I can exert a stronger force that is stronger than some people who is bigger size than me.
I know I can endure the physical pain that some big guys can't handle.

BUT THEN AGAIN. My impression doesn't tells you that

So did I try to work on it?
Well I know what I need, and I think I am the type of guy that God created me such that I WON'T GET FAT like big fat round ball. My mum and dad used to be very slim, but my bro manage to become fat, so I not sure is it genetic or not but I always tell people is not I don't want to gain weight is just I don't think I have the $ to work towards to gain weight.
So all I could do is wait for the day where I have it then I will work towards it. Which is.... hmmm... think when time comes I'll post the drama here.

Secondly, based on my preferred language.

People tend to think that I can't speak, write, listen, to chinese =.=
This one I don't find it frustrating but rather just something to laugh about jokingly.
There are two possibility that people feels that way,
1) I know that are some slang and lingo in chinese I tend to don't use.
2) I speak the english so fluently that you just know that you can tell I'm not chinese speaking.

This is the impression that I get from some of my friends in my campus UTAR, well as you know.. this is a campus that stereotypically known as the University filled with chinese speaking student and staff and community.

So I always joke with them I say, "If I can't speak chinese, is at my DISADVANTAGE, cause most of you all are COMMUNICATING in chinese."

Well the truth is people, I was in a Chinese Primary school, and I LOVE learning chinese at that time because my parents can't speak chinese. Each time I learn a new word, I will tease my parents using chinese, until I was standard 3 the teacher devastated my motivation to learn chinese and now when I come in to UTAR only my motivation to learn chinese increase again.

When I speak chinese, I have the structure of the sentence already in my mind because I have 造句(construct sentence), 写作文(Wrote essay's), and also do those lame shits 默写(Dictation).
The only thing is that I don't read chinese materials like you all do, and I know that all I need is more chinese vocabs and know how to read many CHARACTER then I'm pretty much can speak mandarin like you all.

Not to forget, I DON'T READ Traditional Chinese (繁体字）. Because I still think Simplified Chinese(简体字） so much easy, simplified and still rulez. So I always question young people how do they read Traditional Chinese like Simplified Chinese they laugh and say is SIMILAR @@
Indeed it is but I think I still dislike reading it.

Each time when I read out loud the chinese word to them, they will go really amaze like
"WOW YOU KNOW HOW TO WRITE/READ CHINESE ONE ARRRRR???"
Then I always go and tell them T_T I'm chinese too!!!!!

So did I work on it?
Oh yeaaa, now when I intro myself to chinese MALAYSIAN people, I'll ask them..
Preferred language Chinese Or English?
Don't worry I can understand Chinese, only some words I don't understand then I shall ask you :D

Lastly, based on my interest that they are able to SEE only.

I think I always show people the OBVIOUS interest/hobby to people is playing computer games.
=(
So when I tell them that I do ANYTHING out of just computer games they will go like WHAT I DIDN'T know your like that kind of person. Or another scenario is that when I talk more things in life that they MADE ME ABLE TO AMUSE THEM.
Or another scenario is that they think I'm a boring person that just stay at home and be a good boy.

Well imagine this, CINCAI appearance. Sometimes having very bad posture that I also can't see myself.
Look so young.

So probably people will just think that my life is simple, and I do simple things in life and sometimes very sohai and that's it.

But it took me years to find out that, I'm actually interested to almost anything and a lot of things. If you are crazy of something that is NOT a common interest, share it with me and I will go amaze to hear about the EXISTENCE of like let say.. you wanna tell me about OTHER GALAXY that exist on earth I may not be so interested but I think I can have the ability to hear it from A FRIEND =D
I do get bored when I attend classes, but I never get bored of friends who can tell me the most boring topic in the world that people may think it is provided if he is like willing to try to explain it hard for me.

Another thing I just realize that...
I only will be that INTERESTING person to you, if you open up to me.
If you don't want me to be cincai, and can slowly turn my cincainess to more serious.
I'm not always cincai because there are things in life that I can't be cincai of, one of it which is what is my ambition?

oh one more funny thing is that, when I become a good boy at certain places, people will tend to think that I like the simple happy go lucky guy, but when I tend to do more sohai stuff people think that I am not serious :S So what I should become then?

So in conclusion I know my first impression to many is like will never win an interview. =/
I get frust at times because I feel that why you people want me to have an impression to give to people that I know IT IS NOT me?

I can roughly imagine the first impression that is attractive.
Dress well most of the time, don't reveal simplicity at most occasion, show a little bit of flirtatious and playboy style which is define "ok" by girls.
But that is so NOT me you know.

I wanna appear simple, casual, no need too fancy at all times, most importantly frank and able to be honest with.
ONLY on special OCCASION of course I will have to dress my best or "fake it".

Not during my first introduction especially on most casual occasions.

First impression may frustrate me, but I guess I will just be patient with it and perhaps try to show the other side of me.
Cause somehow I think I just really love to look like I'm very slumber at most of the time. :D
Because I do understand that my simplicity always creates wonder that you'll never expect it to be. ;)

For those people who have bad first impression of me, I will just be cool and try to understand then. :S Afterall we live in the world full of biasness. So I guess I should understand that you'll naturally be stereotype, because when you stereotype me I will tend to stereotype you.. it works both ways :S

For friends who have bad first impression on me, is okay, since I'm a cincai based I don't think I will keep this at heart.

Maybe, when someday I become the greatest con man, I think I'll con you in everything I do. LOL.
Peace out ^^V

Trust.

2010-11-22T01:16:00.003+08:00

Is hard to trust someone sometimes.
But well for me I feel that, trust is like a risk also.
If you trust someone on your most doubtful moments and turns out to be something good, your trust with that person gains, otherwise.. gone case.

There are many quotes about trust, all sounds very cool.
So as for mine, I shall say...

To be able to trust, it will be such a joy, because when you trust, that is where the bond will grow stronger.

Peace out ^^V

What do I see in the game Musical Chair

2010-11-05T16:21:00.006+08:00

This game is like kids version of Free For All battle.
When I was a kid till primary, I NEVER ENJOYED this boring game.
Because it's really sohai..

Just to clarify whether this game is the same as yours in you reader's mind.
The game goes like this, first the so called "judge" will on the music, as the music is on the "player" will have to go round and round the chair.
When the music is STOP, the "player" will have to quickly grab a seat.

Each round there will always be one LESS seat, and each round one by one a "player" will be eliminated.
Till the remaining so called "LAST MAN STANDING".
He or she is the winner.

I hate this game because:
1) This game is more like LUCK, any games requires LUCK I just hate it.
Because as you rotate around the stupid chair, when the music stops, your POSITION will be random, and sometimes even if you are fast, if the chair is not on your side, gone, how fast you run you also will get a really high chance to lose.

2) The so called "judge" who on and off the music or decide when to stop the music can be REAL BIASED. Because he or she will stop the music when he see the one that he wants to win is at a NICE POSITION to grab a seat for the "player" to win.

3) You go round and round and round like a fool, this is not a game. As a kid, I already dislike repetitive of action.
Because the MAIN GOAL is to grab as seat, why must we be so dumb to move around the chair for? I like to play tag, as you know your route to run is different, you might also have a few obstacles and also can trick your opponent, unlike this..

Let me so called explain it in what I see in this game relating with how life is like a musical chair.

As referred above:
1)As you know, is about luck..
Nobody likes to lose because of luck, it is the most FRUSTRATING thing it can happen in life.

2)The "judge" reminds me of the football referee.
He decides who the winner is by MAKING the winner, instead of being a FAIR judge by making sure the game is smooth with no injustice.
Just like the football game, if the referee already side a team, he will make sure other teams get as much foul as possible, and if the other team scored, he will try to claim that as if that is not a goal and so on. BULLSHIT.

3)Already the main objective is to grab a seat, but why must they make us run around the chair? Pure distractions. This one I think the example I can give is like, why must we follow the exact same thing/method how everybody does things? Why can't we just wait there, and when the music stops then we just quickly grab a chair?

Well that's how I so called won the musical chair game.
I told the "judge" not to see, I instead of concentrating of moving around, I waited there. :D
HAH!

Stupid game.

But there is one more thing I can relate with this stupid game.

If you notice,
In life nobody wants to be left out right?
I remember this game is like, the FIRST LOSER will feel like shit.
Why?
Because he is like first who has been left out for not GRABBING a seat, and..
Is not like he doesn't want to grab a seat, is just that THERE IS NO REMAINING seat for him.

This is like something like social group/circle.
The one who first eliminated is like an OUTCAST.
To be honest, nobody likes to be an outcast, just like the one who has been eliminated. He wants to grab a seat but there is no seat.
Well ordinary people will say, "NO! This is a battle of survival, he lost because he wasn't fast enough"
As I mentioned above, what about luck? what about the judge?

Pity the first loser in the game,
in life nobody wants to be an outcast so they try hard and hard to be in the social circle.

Well yes, I would really say that first loser in the game is like an outcast because he is the first who lost and even if he tries justifying that hey! this game is not fair! The game still goes on.

So what say me?

I'd say that well being an outcast is not so bad if you know how to have a better perception in life.
Lets go back to the first loser, well he lost, so what? He went and enjoy the party with other stuff, like playing the birthday boy/girl's favourite toy or any stuff that he or she can do in the party, and just be happy that oh is okay that he just lost. WHY?

"Because at the end of the day, everyone else will be just like him, ELIMINATED" :D

There is only one winner (usually) so in another word, right now
"The outcast may be alone when he lost, but when everyone else lost, the winner will instead be an outcast."

So what's the story behind it?

Outcast exist because there is a real popular guy exist that makes them an outcast,
because there is something that we can compare.. something relative, so that's why they exist.
Or there is another case like, they DIDN'T choose to be an outcast, more like they are born with SOMETHING that make them an outcast.

But nobody knows that like it is things in life that make us look stupid(the "judge"), things we DO IN LIFE sometimes also stupid that we won't admit(running around the chair round and round because is a part of the game). At the end there is only ONE winner, and the winner gets to enjoy his prize by... HIMSELF?

So is like in the end, he had it all for himself.. means.. he's alone?
LOL.

Is like one moment the LOSER is an OUTCAST, the next moment the WINNER is an OUTCAST.
Get to see it?

Of course you will try telling me that the winner gets the glory and so on,
but.. don't forget.. things will still look good on the outcast if the outcast knows.. that....

He gets the privilege to laugh at those who are losing on by one, then when the winner try to say yay I win already...
The whole gang could have just join the "loser" gang and say they already had won cause when they are eliminated and they are enjoying themselves laughing at those who had lost or play other games together :D
When the winner gets over, no one will feel that WINNING THE MUSICAL CHAIR GAME matters, but instead having the idea that well win or lose doesn't matter as long as we have fun together that matters.

So at the end of the day, many things in life is all in the state of mind.
The outcast was deemed outcast is also cause of the state of mind that those who are still remaining in the game deemed that he has lost everything.
But that FIRST LOSER can just laughed and say....

"Hey.. do you know that, all of you are BOUND to lose AT THE END OF THE DAY, just matter of time, cause there is only one winner, and that ONLY WINNER will also be LEFT OUT by you guys because you all have to lose in the end. While I.. get to slowly laugh at you all one by one.. to see you all lose and be just like me :D"

From there, that outcast can justify himself.
What makes you and me so different huh? :D

So these are what I could see in the game musical chair.
A circle and a cycle.
That is how our life like.

Everytime when I read your blog..

2010-10-26T13:38:00.004+08:00

Everytime when I read your blog, you'll definately will somehow talk about God.
How good He is to you and so on...

Everytime when I read your blog, woah!! I see how perfect is your life is.

Everytime when I read your blog, I know that I am never in your life anymore.

Everytime when I read your blog, when you mention about how you wanna keep yourself up to God's standard...

I laughed deeply inside my heart.

I laughed because I don't understand how could a christian like you can treat me worst than a non christian treat me.

I laughed because I always thought that if I were to be in your life episodes,
I know things were to be much different.

I laughed because I find it funny that there is such thing as so called "war" between christians and christians.

I laughed.. everytime when I read about certain things in your blog,
because sometimes I feel that is really fake even is really real to people who are good to you, and you are good to them.

You know what is the funniest thing?
I laughed because I find it funny that I still can dream of our ideal meeting up again. How would I react, and what am I that time..

Aihhh..

I laughed too, because you think that I was crazy for saying something that seem impossible for you at that young age.
But now I think back...

Do you know what?
You could actually play a big role in my life, impact it like a meteor crash the earth, and I can actually see it like what am I like if I am still part of your life now :)

Everytime I read your blog,
I will always tell myself.. oh I am reading a christian bitch blog.
The bitch that don't give a fuck about me anymore.

You don't really use vulgar words,
always potray a good side to everyone,
able to tell the world that you will keep herself holy and pure..
Will always thank God of all the good things that happen in your life.
Then I'll start laughing that.. damn..
A good bitch treat me bad, does it mean that I am that bad?

Or.. is it because of your pride is just too important to her all the while,
that if I were to be in your life episode then you will feel that I am the main thing that will make you feel ashame?

Everytime when I read your blog,
I think I really wish to ask you this,
Who I am to you? Why do I have to know you and then because of knowing you it affected my emotions so bad few years back that I still can recall the IMPACT.

I could even still remember you blaming me, for HUMILATING YOU.

Among all words to use, why humilate?
Your english so good, I'm sure you know how to use the words well.

Dedicated to someone who have very low chances to read this =D
Is a dedication, not a judgement.

You know freestyle writting?
Imagine that you of all the sudden feel like writting something that is from your heart and mind.
You are a blogger too, you'll understand. =)

At most case you don't believe in miracle, it happens..

2010-10-20T01:37:00.003+08:00

I will forever never understand when will God does His miracle.

Never..

For those readers who actually "follow" my blog,
well remember I've mention that I more likely to like fail a few subjects?
Because I have 7 subjects to take in 14 weeks.

I see myself look very horrible I SACRIFICE MY SPORTS TIME and that is SAD.
Now I don't know how to get back the habit.

I've got my results, and well whether is a small miracle or what I still will say is a miracle.
Although is not like I won a million bucks, but to me is something tho..

So I have.
1)Thermodynamics I
2)AutoCAD and Programming
3)Mathematics For Engineering I
4)Statics
5)Basic Electronics
6)Circuit Theory
7)Basic Economics Accounting and Management (B.E.A.M)

So what just happen?
I'll roughly brief my performance and my end results, something typical and boring just to update.

1)Thermodynamics I
Is a study of Energy, is open book test.
Coursework marks I got about 27 I think out of 40.
During finals, is open book, BUT I DID NOT DO ONE QUESTION AT ALL.
The rest of the questions I know got one question I literrally leave it blank but simply put in the formula.
To be honest, I didn't study much in this subject but merely practicing the trend of how to use the formula.
I can say that I think I fail this subject, I not sure about my coursework is 27 or 24 or what but I know is 20-30.
Don't know how that subject I got a C which is a pass, and ok immediately I say is a miracle.

Because there is NO WAY I could pass this subject missing out one PORTION of the final exam, and the rest of the question unsure but only QUESTION ONE know how to do.

2)AUTOCAD and Programming
We started off with C++ programming.
I was a noob fuck.
Yes really I should use that word because I was like not really doing well in this subject, although I do pay attention in practical, not full but in lecture not so.
The assignment I also don't know the FULL FUNCTION of it.
Doughlas was a goodfriend that did most of the part, and I can say he save me.
AUTOCAD, my gosh... I even speechless.
Assignment 1 2 and test 1, I get to know my results ONE SHOT.
ALL SAME mistakes, too late to know.. wasted so much marks.
Test two, out of 20 I think I deserve to get less than 10 or 10.
But who cares, I know I will pass this subject, but I know I won't get high.
I feel a little disappointed because it was suppose to be an easy subject,
FIRST HALF PROGRAMMING, SECOND HALF AUTOCAD and NO FINAL EXAMS.
I wish in future I will do better in similar subject, e.g designing software and program some other stuff. Got a C+ for this

3)Mathematics for engineering I.
Is kinda easy, need practice.
I just find out that I should master my Integration.
I must do it, because I think I spent most of my life leave the question of integration BLANK. THAT IS SERIOUS!
Sadly I ler this type of no maths brain human, always pass math only one.
Bored with it, but I guess I will have to deal with it by finding an interesting way to practice my other maths stuff. Got a C as expected, always do math can do the intro don't know how to finish one. Kanasai.

4)Statics.
This subject, easy.
TOO BAD, final exam, and test like kinda screw up.
But overall I got B+, didn't know that I actually could do better.
My mentor Foo Shi Wei told me that he fail statics, but for me.. statics pro..
expert tau suppose to get A if I were to put more time to practice. Because all her questions are all in the text book question. I finish all means I SUPER PRO.

5)Basic Electronics.
Interesting, and so called most stressful subject in the sem.
But I actually LOVE IT.
I don't know how many people would say they don;t understand the lecturer's teaching but to me, he is like the lecturer who actually very kind till the extend that he is willing to spend a lot of time to actually clear your doubts if you consult him.
I got a C for this subject, and I feel that I should put more effort in finding good exercises to do and then consult him personally.

6)Circuit Theory.
I'm always sleepy during lecture.
Monday 8am class this class, Friday 8am class this class.
No mood.
Tired. restless.

But I know this subject is also kinda fun,
and is like a MUST LA for those who doing electrical stuff.
Like those basic stuff like Power, CIRCUIT ANALYSIS, etc etc.
Got 30/40 for course work, I got C+ overall.
Meaning I got about 25-29 in my final exam.
IS BAD. But well I sendiri also didn't know how to study smart so end up LAST MINUTE only find out.. OHHHH!! there is an effective way to study.

7) BEAM
Good lecturer, bad timing.
Friday class 5-7pm.
I really skip the last 3 lecture.
No mood to really go score this subject.
I want to go back to my hometown laa, ask me stay back for this subject and I have other 6 already.

So from how boring the way I write this entry already describe that I don't know, I think I more like deserve to fail, but well.. I know I still got put in my effort to hope that it won't fail, and yea I know I was praying hard that somehow God will give me strength to go through the toughness to go through 7 subjects. So yea I do my best, and well things turn out the way it is should thank Him then =D
Again I would say, yea miracle.
Is not like winning one million dollar but more like knowing that I guess miracle only happen when necessary times. According to the one who does miracles.

During this sieness of Year 1 Sem 1,
I guess now I can see like study is more like the mental attitude that will push your physical discipline, and from there the so called study smart will somehow comes along automatically when I actually get into the subject.

I need to GET INTO the subject where when I do work, nothing can disturb me to finish it. I know that well..
Now is my short semester, I will have to find lotsa things to do before the long semester start.

This is a boring entry..
Because I type this also I feel like wanna sleep..
Sleepy.

But oh well, I blog shuang oni.

So now my CGPA is 2.35.
People tell me is hard to increase your CGPA.
Aihh sien again, because again I also now so enthusiastic to try push it to at least 3.0. Don't know how will I do it to get there.

I do not want to sacrifice a lot of things.
So errr lets see do I have any so called smart ideas to make it without sacrificing anything then.

Find out more after this...

I don't know most of all things or anything but... Goodbye =)

2010-09-28T12:47:00.013+08:00

This blog entry is dedicated to someone who exist but can't exist in my life.
So to enhance reader's imagination, or to make you guys less curious, a picture of her have to be so called "stolen".

Is already almost 5 years since the first time I know about your existence.
Or maybe 7 years ><.
I remember I saw you somehow at tuition I think, and I know you are the SPECKY girl, the one who wears specs.

But I officially get to know you is when you are my classmate.

I will never fucking understand why would God chose to let me know you,
but well.. =)
To me, knowing someone is a gift, and have lotsa purpose reasons behind it I may or may not understand..
Especially when things between the one know you know changes dynamically.

When I came into Form 4, to me I look at you as a girl who just laugh a lot, laugh very loud, talk very loud, and bitchy too xD
You were always that so called high class girl that I told myself that damn,
I don't think I will ever gonna win her heart man. Or worst case, I don't think such girl can get a long with me as good friend.

Well, ALL OF IT CAME TRUE. =)
My prediction was right, except for one thing.
I never thought that you will be someone that I will actually talk to, share my stuff too, and the most "KI SIAO" thing is...
I actually like you before, and I guess you're the only girl that I say I wanna marry you like some dumb dumb.

Thinking back,
I think it was you or me who add each other,
wait I remember that I think I go your friendster profile, and then add you in msn, then in return you actually add me in friendster.

When I first first chat with you, I was just being the stupidest me that no one will think is interesting..
But never thought that character of mine actually could make you laugh.
I remember..
Before liking you, I like another girl before you, I remember you were the one who will laugh at me first before her. At that time, I remember I was like a super shy dude who still can't overcome his shyness.
Maybe.. if things were different, you were different, you would actually be the girl who could make me a more confident and better Shung Jiu?
No?

But it doesn't matter.. lolx

Moving on..

Time spent with you weren't really memorable,
because we don't really have many sweet moments together,
there are some like, I remember one of the best is..
I get to be in the same team with you during CF camp, and then you offer me a MENTOS CANDY, and I was stun like this O_O

and another one was, when I was injured and was admitted to hospital.
You sms me like you so damn kan cheong until I was so damn giler syok that looks like this.

Ohh!! and one more last few ones, you were the one who tell me this before.

"If , you will have less one contact, Malaysia will have less one people, 4 BETA will have less one people, less one classmate etc etc."
Hah.. so cute la you..

and.. you were the one who approach me to ask me to buy that bouquet of roses for P.N. You actually let me see what it feels like to give flowers to girls, somore let me to customize the note in the bouquet. HAHA.

Those were only one of the few good ones with you and I that I will always remember.
The rest were all emoo emoo and emooo all the way.
I also remember my first compose song was also for you!
Lol, damn you! If it was your dream guy who made that for you, you would fucking love it okay. But well, who ask I'm just nobody to you.. so is like that lor.

Just too bad that it couldn't be like more and more happy memories.

I was sad,
because I already see ahead what are the possible happy things that could happen are NOT going to happen anymore. Because I know what are those happy things ahead, if we are still in good terms and contact.

Hah, I always tell myself, to take care of you, is really like taking care of a princess like that, whoever can actually take good care of you, well that guy would be very geng la.

Can buy for you bird nest and another anti-aging product to take care and maintain your looks, you health, and all that.
Take care of you and your kids, and then little Pei Yi will also look adorable like you.
Take you here and there and everywhere, till you can non stop blogging about all the places you've been because you husband so dam7 geng can bring you go holiday to everywhere of the world.
Most of all, able to make you laugh, satisfy each and every of your needs. ;)

This is how you will look like, in few years time..

That was all the thoughts that I used to have.

Yup, career woman.
Good for you, get to go other country to further your studies?
Doing Post graduate?
I'm not sure... I don't know anything but I just know that you are no longer in Malaysia anymore for quite a long time, maybe marry an Australian I also won't know.

Is already got like more than 3 years since I last saw you,
last hear how rough is your voice is..
how bising you are, that I know and we know that it makes your hubby feel damn I have an active wife. HAHA
Like this...

Is already almost 5 years girl..
and guess I will always be that Shung Jiu that you will look at it as some kind of alien vs predator species, someone you should avoid and so on, someone that will never be any significant in your life.

Is okay.

Even though I have to give up the thoughts on what are the possible happy moments that could happen between us in the future if things weren't like this..

Still..
I would wish that I could be there in KLIA tell you,
Pei Yi arr.. Bye bye.. *wave*
Then pass you something you can bring over there that makes you feel that you are special to someone over here. lolx. But sien, that doesn't matter anyway.

That could actually happen in 4 days time.
If you and I were still in good term. xD

But since I will never have a chance tell it to you face-to-face.

Goodbye, Tian Pei Yi..
Thank You for happy times,
Sorry for Creepy times,
Make you angry times,
no happy moment times.

-End of entry-

We live to tell our sucky tale. xD

2010-09-07T21:10:00.003+08:00

Sometimes life's like shit, and yet you still live..
and you ask youself why are you going all these shit, might as well just die and avoid it.

But no..
The reason is...
You live to tell a tale to others how you suffer, with your siao kia high determination.. not to give up etc etc.

At least when you finish it with shit, you still can tell people you live through that shit. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

I am an uninteresting blogger. xD

2010-09-05T12:16:00.002+08:00

My life..
Is tooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo dramatic.

Maybe my life can't be like how those famous bloggers like where they can afford to go here and there and everywhere, but I know my life is more dramatic than many people out there.
WHY?

Because my life could be more dramatic than those drama series that you watch on TV!
In fact, some of them could even be sad ending, unlike those in the drama where most of the time is a happy ending.

So if my life is too dramatic, why am I not the most interesting blogger?
Ohh..
Probably cuz my passion to write blog drops already.

I remember when I was form 5 where my blog become one of the big hit in school cause I always have things they wanna kepoh about xD
So I guess yea, someday if I become famous by whichever ways..

How boring I am also, people will tend to think my boringness is interesting.
How long winded my blog post will be, people will tend to read it also.

oh yes, my blog very RARE to have pictures.
Cuz I don't own a camera, even I used to have a camera phone I do not have the habit to snap snap snap things that I see xD
Neither I have the skill to write like those story book or novel writer.

Sien.
Maybe someday I should find some other way to blog-nize my story in some other interesting ways since there is no such thing as you can ask people to help you blog =P

Once again, I would like to end my entry with saying "The reason why I like to blog, is because I like to share many many things with people, especially my stories "

The friend whom I missed so much.

2010-08-31T03:35:00.004+08:00

His name is Zachary Yeo Jian Wei.

Girls this is one cute boy here

I know how things between me and him has changed so much ever since we left secondary.
But I will ALWAYS remember him as my really good friend no matter what.

I just read back one of my secondary school entry,
and yea once again I read back the part where he became my hero.

Well I would say that, this guy I know, will still be the one who will come to me and yeaa still say he is my friend if someday or everyday people will say I'm siao kia shungz.

This guy here I remember how I use to be his dai kor.
He always like to find me and chat about things in life.

He borns in a family who is richer than mine, and he was the dude who I felt that yea always give me the feeling that there is someone who will shelter me.

Now, we are older now.
Things somehow like change into like upside down.
I maybe like some kind of nerd and he is the cool kid can tell me, yo shungz wadda are you still doing man, ish you should be like that and that lolz.

and.. he has a girlfriend and I don't have :P

and..what else?

He graduated in the one academy and I just started UTAR.

Well lets start back how we know each other shall we?

He I would say, is indeed God's gift.
Sometimes I really wish to tell him that, yea when your without me, you'll be more cooler too you know. But he chose to proudly announce yea Shung Jiu is my friend until some of our friends even say that we are like gays, but he said this to me.

"How can we be gay? If you like boobs and I like boobs, we can't be gay right?"
I tell him yup! How the eff can we not like boobs =X
But that time we use NEN NEN POK so is OBVIOUSLY not man boobs but you know the breast that you babies suck on.

He was with me as a brother like that, we always story each other about the girl we like.
He I remember likes a Singapore girl and he likes this Singapore girl for a really long time.
While I too like about 3 girls as he like this Singapore girl that long.
Eh I switch cause I terpaksa switch okay =(

I know how the story between this singapore girl and him can still hurt him a lil,
I do feel sad too, but I as POSITIVE SHUNGZ will say.
=D He and the Singapore girl will someday come to a even even happy ending even though that girl may not be together like the IDEAL ENDING.
But whatever la he still has his gf, Chew Zhi-Ni.

There is one time, I blog about the girl I like.
Wow kanasai, that girl was like so POPULAR in school okay.
Hah, I don't know why I so brave go like popular girl, and ownself status also like siao gina go like popular girl. ><
Then I got so fed up with this popular girl, and I blog it out everything, then this popular girl make things even big ><

So IMAGINE a damn nerdy noob guy like me go say I LIKE THIS GIRL!!! what's worst is that I even say yea I want to marry her to =D and and!! yea I believe that she is my future wife somore.
I know, if you are a normal person you will think I'm crazy.

So imagine she's paris hilton, and I'm like Peter Parker nerd version.
How many people will come and shoot at me, but this guy over here name Zachary was FEARLESS TOO, he stand by my side.. and he defended me in the cyberworld.

He even SPEAK UP to a Christian Fellowship PRESIDENT, DON'T PLAY PLAY.
He defended for me.

Well for those who still thinks Shung Jiu is crazy, well..
I would say..
I may be crazy, but I know that I'm not crazy enough to do things like murder people, and other horrible crimes that you can think of.
In fact I'm crazy enough to think of how to give you people who say I'm crazy a better life by venturing into Engineering okay.

I've chose my path to go for engineering instead of going to the design world, for people of the earth. So please, is for your benefit pls SHHHHH!

I mean, this CF president was RESPECTED by all, and my friend was so BRAVE in spite of people laughing at me, and how people will throw words at me, he was there saying I will defend Shung Jiu!
Wow.

"but as a friend of shungjiu , i am gona side him no matter wat..wat are friends for?
i belieave god put us 2gether for a reason , to suport each other .."

God put us together for a reason, to support each other. =)
Now I read back, I feel... wow.

This guy, I play football with him.
I play RO with him,
I did one funny animation video with him,
and many more stuff..

I don't whether this blog entry will he read or not.
Things has change.
I can say that, I think is about 18, 19, 20, 21.
Hmm maybe 2-3 years since we really hang out as kawan baik.

I remember we kinda like make a promise.
You know.. youngsters.. kids.. or whatever you call us.
We have a plan..
a vision..

To do something...

He is now into Advertising firm, interesting right?
I mean who doesn't like advertisement?

Me? I just started my engineering STRUGGLING.
I do hope within these few years I will try to keep in touch with him and see what an Engineer+ an Advertiser could do.

Both of our profession start with an "An"
Oppss I mention N N.

There is much more to blog about him.
But my blog entry is too long.. till then.

Btw look at me, I'm so nerdy boy hairstyle cause I have to go form 6 and cut my hair till like that =( No choice.

These are the dudes whom first acknowledge Shungz unique character,
they are the first who actually fitness my stupidity thoughts and so on, and still can call me Back-a-thon. haha

Is MERDEKA, we used to go for this event museum sleepover.
But sadly the event is not under one of our friends' mother anymore..
But is okay, to me this day is like a remembrance of how happy I am to know you all.
As some of us are in the oversea.. and busy with our life.

I miss.. all my friends, and I hope someday I can gather them back.
Everbody have dreams, that is one of mine.

Doom.. =D

2010-08-29T17:27:00.002+08:00

Aihhh, to be honest I am quite doom for my subjects for my first sem.

My definition of DOOM meaning yes is a FAIL not a B grade for those smart and hardworking people.

Never in my life, I have such encounter where I have 7 subjects, on a START of of my semester is WORLD CUP season, and CRISIS start within my family on a start of my semester, and a HUGE change in my life where I have to you know learn to adapt to stay outside.

Sigh I don't know does my uni's HOD or maybe the one who is in charge understand this that starting off with a SEVEN SUBJECTS on the first sem is STRESSFUL =)
Stress in the sense that in order to get GOOD GRADES you just have to sacrifice everything.

I've told several people before that I'm someone who has many interest, and NO I'm not going to throw them away, even though I can't do it physically.
Because these interest make me.. me, who I really am, my identity depends on it, so does what I want to be depends on it.

I honestly hope that I will not be STUCK with such thing anymore,
I don't mind being busy, but as long as I'm busy and have my own free time as allowance that will do like, able to still have time to go for my regular sports and other interest everyweek that will do good. But yea I know there are other people out there who are also stuck with things too until they accept it, for me...
I hate the word BUSY until can't do what we really want to do.

So is already week 14 next week so I shall brief through what I did the last 13 weeks.

Week 1 and 2 it was my horrible week.

Week 1 I did not go for the first two day of my class because my bill is not settled, financial stuff is not done yet hence I don't want to just go to KL alone without any cash with me.
As for week 2 I remember I was like trying to adapt my lifestyle in there, as there is no INTERNET at my apartment, furthermore there is like getting along with my housemate session where we play game together xD

Week 3 and Week 4 I think that is where the WORLD CUP STARTED.
So obviously my sleep time is affected.
I remember I was cursing so much that why can't my uni understand that WORLD CUP is like a MUST WATCH thing.
But nevertheless, how it affects me, still I remember how I do spend time doing my studies with lousy results.

Week 5 and week 6
Was the week that I think I beginning to adapt my lifestyle, and I start to realize many things such as what I need to learn in the syllabus and so on.
Start to join many society, and blablabla.
Plus some assignment and test are in week 7, hence I remember yea I know that I am LACKING quite a lot ><

Week 7 it was like the END of half of my semester,
one of my subject AutoCAD and Programming, has ended first part.
Some course took programming first, some course took AutoCAD first.
As for mine, I'm off with C++ programming. I think world cup has ended earlier week or something.

Week 8
It was my BIRTHDAY week come on!
I deserve a break!
But sadly, Basic Electronics test is ON a day before my birthday.
Aihh, I NEVER CELEBRATE a birthday on a EXAM day. That's kinda sad, but IS OKAY, I shouldn't complain because there are other people's birthday on their final exam and so on.
Afterall after I came back from exam, got small celebration wor. xP

Week 9 and 10
This is where I realize, 7 subjects was a killer.
I love doing Practical, I don't mind having ONE assignment each on every subject,
because it makes me have the joy to learn. BUT! WHAT THE HECK, 7 subject SUX because..
1) The focus will be such a mess, assuming after one test, then next week another subject got test?
2) Assuming this week you do this subject assignment, next week you do another subject assignment and another subject's test, or maybe PRACTICAL report.

I even find out that doing PRACTICAL report, KILLS you time like watching 2 movies in a row T_T
EVEN though you may know how to do, but IT TAKES TIME, I hope I can find a way to do it faster with ACCURATE info written in it.

Week 11 and Week 12
Week 11 was my busy week, I remember got 3 practical at one go, plus outing on Sunday with the Robo society.
Plus a few assignments to hand up.
Test coming up. Plus I did not sleep in peace even though I was sick and took cough medicine.

Last week was week 13, and this week is week 14.
I'm GLAD that I do not have test on week 14.
I'm glad to feel the FREE-ness for the moment until I can type a BLOG ENTRY here.
So within this week 14, and next week is my FINAL moment to make those FAILING subjects to PASS.

I'm not sure will I be able to do it for some subject, as most of the subject coursework marks is 40, I hope I get at least 20/40 and if my FINALS I get 30/60
I still get a pass =)
Nevertheless I'm aiming for a 40/60 so even if I get 10/40 in my course I still get 50. Furthermore 40/60 to be is like a B.
I'm happy to get a B as I AIM to be a B+ student, because I want to be A+ in other things that makes me Shung Jiu.

My life is just TOO DRAMATIC, will I be able to make it?
Lets see how it goes in a month time. =)

2011

2010-08-22T11:49:00.003+08:00

2010 is about the end already.

as it remains about 4 more months to go, it feels like 2011 is coming liao xD
Probably cause my birthday has already passed so that is why I will feel like 2010 has over.

I've told my friend that I wanted to go to Genting Casino,
and hopefully in a near future I can go to Singapore to visit those Sentosa's Casino.
Sigh, the last time I've been to Singapore was last year and this year I don't think I will be going unless of all the sudden I got RM2k as cash prize and I get to spend 1k to go to Singapore again.

Anyway just some thought of what happen in this year..
End of something and a beginning of something.

End of Foundation, Beginning of Degree.
End of Teen, Beginning of Young Adult? =O really ar?
End of driving my car often, Beginning to travel by public transport often. SUX.
End of staying at home often, Beginning to adapt life outside my home. Kinda interesting.
End of so many other things and beginning of a whole new thing.

2011 is coming soon.
As the last four months, I do have some expectation to do a few things before the year ends.
I have some clear vision about what I want to do in the last 2010.
Again.. sigh, I blog something which is like "Ohh I gotta feeling what's ahead of me, but I'm not revealing yet." xD
But yeaa I hope I will reveal one by one before 2010 ends. =)

Many things has changed me to lose interest in blogging already. xD

So one of the thing I want to blog about is my housemates xD
Hopefully I get a picture of them

Being busy for nothing.

2010-08-17T20:33:00.002+08:00

To be honest I REALLY HATE the word busy.
But here I am again, STUCK WITH STUPID STUFF.

Currently this semester and my FIRST year in degree is STUPIDLY busy.
We got 7 subjects and 6 of them got finals and the one do not have finals is 2 subject combine into one.

I feel damn urrgghh.
First why my Uni have to give us start out FIRST SEM in our FIRST YEAR with 7 subjects?
Somore one of the subject is NON ENGINEERING ONE, which is Basics Economics Accounting and Management.

Is just SPOILING LA, somore the timing is 5-7pm Friday.
Can't really blame the lecturer cause he is not available other time.

But SERIOUSLY, being BINDED by BUSYNESS in studies is STOOOPID.
I prefer to do more PRACTICAL work in that way I learn better.

7 SUBJECTS ASSIGNMENT DUE DATE like week after week, hence the TENSION AND STRESS won't go away so fast.
Although it may seem we have sufficient time BUT if we just FOLLOW THE NORMAL FLOW we just WON'T have time to do other stuff.

PLUS! IS WORLD CUP LA! Why can't my UNI understand that world cup is like a festival?
Haiz..

I HONESTLY HOPE NEXT TIME IN FUTURE NO MORE BINDED BY WORK OR STUDIES.

I as Shung Jiu WANT MY TIME to relax and rest, to get inspiration, to get better effectiveness in adsorbing the knowledge.
Furthermore need to get ideas to do other more PRACTICAL stuff like perhaps designing real stuff.

I don't mind being busy but as long as I HAVE MY LEISURE TIME EVERYWEEK I would be ok.
7 subjects with NO ALLOWANCE of LEISURE it really make me feel that my life is meaningless.

Last time my third semester in foundation also although I hardcore study, I will have at least my USUAL leisure time.

Things will change..

2010-08-11T12:48:00.002+08:00

For the better or for the.. worse.
In my life I have both, I hate it when I have to go through an event that will change everything to worse.

I can't avoid it, but I just have to go through it..
with Joy I'm suppose ... =)

I am always afraid each time when I reach a turning point,
like what will happen after I do or don't do this.
I detest this feeling till I wish that we always can rewind everything if things get worse and go back in time to make things go for the better.

So what's the solution for it?
I'm suppose having alternative is always make you relieve, like lets say you either fail or succeed, if you fail so what do you do? You follow your alternative.

Then again, alternative can't always be the one that could actually make you happy.

Aihhhh...

This cannot, that cannot. very "fan".

So you know what is the best?
Just chillax and live on, and see where the sad events lead you.
I've live up until this age to see all my sad events always lead to something happy, and something happy will also lead to something sad.. worse still =(

Is like Sum of Happiness = Sum of Sadness.
No difference.

So at the end of the day, lolx the joy of living is..
You are able to taste bitter, sweet, sour, and salty!!!!
Sad happy angry joy.. yea so what if that event will make you sad right?
Because able to feel is always better than not able to feel.

Off to class.

Merajuk entry, aiseh....

2010-08-06T20:43:00.003+08:00

Aiyoyoyoyoo.. noob dou sei.
The entry below I merajuk about, today turn out something really ZHA LAN DOU.

Is like u know the person that caused me to post that entry actually appeared right in front of my eyes. :O

So if so happen this entry she read. I gg.com
But oh well..

Now a days lei, my mind nothing much to blog about.
I got no mood to blog about "inspirational story".
SO people who still read my blog, just chillax, errm I think about after this semester I should blog more often.

Still again, my passion of blogging compare to last time is a lot of difference.
I guess now I am more passionate with other stuff.
That is a changed that I know about myself ^^V

Leng Lui in facebook delete me lei... Woaaaahhh I so sohai =(

2010-08-06T01:33:00.004+08:00

Lol, die lor.
Am I such a stalker?

I don't know why am I deleted from a few ppl's facebook from last time till now also got. Yes, you got it right mostly are girls.. or maybe guys delete me also I don't know cause I seldom check their profile or facebook page.
I mean.. I don't understand man.

I rather they don't add me instead of add me and then delete later on.
Aih, oh well.. maybe they just don't feel comfortable having me on their contact list right?
Whatever la, if you people wanna think that way is ok then. =/

So among all people to be deleted, I feel so weird like even same UNI also they add and delete. Diao.
Sometimes it just give me have this feeling like, oh u wanna delete me ar?
Klor, nxt time there will be a day if you need something that I have but your friend's in your list don't have, don't regret.

Hah.. most of them are all leng lui, I have to understand.. yea..
Most leng lui always feel insecure in the net one, because is one of guys hobby to go facebook and see leng lui =D.
Any leng lui profile picture can make the guy go click and see see their profile.
I'm just being normal admiring their beauty, why kenot T_T.

So to the LENG LUI's out there that I first add facebook then we know each other.
I don't care whether people got call you leng lui before or not, to me, all of you are :D
Thx for the approval at least, and.. yea not deleting me even though sometimes I will come and see see your camwhoring pictures like how others do and the best thing is we may not talk to each other in real person. =D

U love to camwhore, I support your camwhore by saying it nice ^^V

Sometimes I really wish I have a third eye, and this third eye is untraceable and unnoticeable.
That eye is 24-7 look at leng lui until I get sick and bored of it =)

Is not to say enjoy the sight of leng lui is like raping them also, but yet..
Aih... it is like a sin like that, and is wrong.

I mean they as leng lui should understand, if leng zai also can make them go crazy, why not leng lui?
Is just a guy reaction lei T_T
That's why everytime when I spot at leng lui, I always say in my heart, I really wish every girl on earth will have the same leng lui face.
Better, so I won't have this "Waaahh leng lui" feeling and just not get distracted by them. ^^

But don't care la, I have learned that leng lui are just everywhere already.
Thanks to cosmetic help, now MORE girls and I think most girls can at least know what is like to be the LENG LUI that can make a guy stun for a few seconds.
Whee~~
At least is fair a bit.

You can go anywhere till the end of the earth, even some ulu kampung also, you will DEFINITELY see leng lui.

I will end my entry with errr one thought that I never share much before, my good friend used to tell me.

"You see right, some girls ler too pretty until you see them also you don't feel like seeing them because NOTHING interesting already. BUT! Some girls ler although they may look like average looking or maybe you think that is so ugly but once you get to know them, you will see them look more and more pretty everyday."

Seriously I would wish to write another blog entry about leng lui, then split into part 1 part 2 part 3. ^^V
Till then, this is my thought of the moment.

I want to hide something in a hidden message can?

2010-08-04T01:16:00.002+08:00

Sometimes I blog, I got the feeling like write things to let someone know at the same time don't want that person to directly know that I'm am writing to him or her =X.

Then when that person reads then he or she will like Hmmmm......
HAHAHA

Well I'm all the while very straight forward, don't like to twist and turn, but hmm somehow I got a few thoughts to let someone know something.
You know.. SOMETHING.. that maybe it will change the outcome of EVERYTHING :O

That is when you have this kind of feeling like, damn should I let this person know or what?
LOLX. like should I put my message in the box or UNDERNEATH the box? HEHEHEHEH

The cake that took me more than a mouthful to finish

2010-07-31T01:58:00.004+08:00

Last saturday, after that Basic Electronics test that I really got no mood to take it.
I flew and rushed back home to go to Pyramid to meet up with Anne Anne.

Simple day, simple outing, with a simple cake she bought for me.

Simple? Not so. xD

She asked me like which slice of cake I want, I told her "Aiyaa I not so fuzzzywuzzy with cake one, afterall is just one piece, and wanna buy for me."
She told me cannot cincai one cause is I'm the one who is going to eat it.

Yea, so don't know how we ended up choosing the Green Tea cake.
The size looks like one bite can finish, but I so noob, the cake so thick, I should slowly... enjoy maa...
Fwuaaaah, I go back home eat the first bite of the cake like so gam tong wei. xD
I thought the size is just using one mouth can finish, but after the first bite, I pause...
Then before I finish it, I look at the cake...

Wahh, it was Anne who gave me the cake hor.
Makan already habis liao. Xp.
It only converts into memory...
Wootz, then when I eat, woah never eat before such cake with such taste which is not in my taste dictionary.

Dun play play huh.

Thank You Anne Anne.
You will always be the first who give me Green Tea cake. xD
Green Tea cake just got one... flavouring taste instead of ORGANIC taste.. from breadstory. XD

I wish the cake can regenerate itself so I can always eat the cake over and over again.. haha

When a guy likes a girl.

2010-07-19T03:43:00.003+08:00

The feeling of liking a girl is really nice.
The feeling of enlightenment as what every noobs would say..
Is indescribable.

I've seriously like three girls before in my life,
or more than that..
Is sure does feel good, but then everytime when I think of the sad endings, after the first one, it feels that liking a girl is like a dead end.

So what I mean by a dead end?
It just as simple as, assume that the feeling just develops.

Is not cool at all,
because it seems that it could only come to ONE thing.

The girl just have to know, and is either heads or tail.
There is no IN BETWEEN.

I don't know is just my luck or is JUST LIKE THAT.
That is either okay, the girl like you and then you two get together or the girl don't have any feelings for you, and THINGS GET WORST after you just TELLING OUT WHAT IS THE TRUTH.

There is no such thing as, even though the girl may not have feelings, things still remain as COOL as it is.
YEA AS IF.

What I saw today has finally answered my pondering question a long time ago.
THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS how a guy and a girl can still be good friends if they don't end up being a boyfriend girlfriend or lifetime partner AFTER they reach the level of so called "loved".

I have this friend, which is a girl and another one which is a guy.
We THREE used to go out together when this girl came back to Malaysia.
Both of them were like good buddies and of course I USED to sense that this guy like this girl laa.

We THREE I can 999999% say we are close to each other, and this girl just like this guy as a real good buddy.
So don't know how, last year or was it this year..
they became couples and I was so GUAI LAN go joke
"EHhh see la you two together then next time how WE THREE go out? Want me to be lamp post meh?"

All of the sudden, I got the news that they broke up few days ago.
I don't know when they broke off but they just broke off without me knowing a single shit.
So today was the day I met the girl and a few of us, she was telling me that not to let this guy know cause SURELY she don't feel comfortable or what.
But end up the guy TURN UP.

F-U-C-K was the first word that came into my mind, because I see this guy his facial expression wasn't good and his VOICE PROJECTION was really SOFT.
I feel as shit as him because I know he must be SERIOUSLY EMO SHIT.

Yup, that is what fucking happen when a guy likes a girl.
They will become more noob, and weak. Just like how the movies will keep saying and how you heard from others.

I know many of my friends used to tell me before how is NOT WORTH to give it out all to the girl that don't have feelings for me.
But haha, I think back now, no matter how much I "lost" I know I didn't lose anything.
In fact I gain a lot of things.

I may lose MONETARY stuff, and also lost my emotions and so on.
But I never lose myself.. yet... for the moment.
In fact, I gain more knowledge how to do even more "special" for the next one.
It defines me, I just want to be that guy to do the "special" present for them.
Cause if i don't, I'll lose my that identity.
There won't be anymore fun adventure to do stuff for girls I like anymore if they stop me.

In my life, there is only three girls that I like that I ever let them know directly yea I like you. peace ^^V
The first one was like, initially she said No worries we'll still be friends.
The second one was like, WTF and shocked reaction.
The third one was like, so called being cool, and ask me don't worry you can sleep in peace.

yea I don't care how my this entry is going to be long AGAIN.
I seldom blog, so APPRECIATE my longness of my blog post because I got my OHM of blogging NOW.

So how did it went actually, yea of course all three also didn't like me,
because I'm noobing, eventhough I'm noobing, I'm still an honest Shungz.
But somehow I think honest is not cool to them.

The first girl I seriously like got me really emo,
till I felt that yea I feel like suicide, and just die la.
But of course never really go simply attempt la, but really felt the impact of..
THE REAL GUY EMO.
But whatever it is, I won't want to say much, I blog and emo as I go through it.
It was thanks to my blog that I didn't do crazy stuff.
Because telling people how crazy you are for the girl that people would tell you is not worth is already an attempt of SUICIDING and that was how I "KILLed" myself, my character that love her a lot just "suicide" and dies as I "blog". =)
But whatever it is.. I hope if you are reading this.
I still will say this, no matter how much I would be mad, still I will say this to you first girl.

I until today, hope that we could at least be friends like how we was.
It is surprising how you would all the sudden replied me like normal.
It looks normal to me, don't know laa.. I guess things between you and I will remain like this. So I could only say, anything lor.

The second girl, WTF..
and I wouldn't want to elaborate more.
She claims that I never love her, don't know how to love her, like her for her looks because I say she is hot not beautiful.
Damn lin sohai.
She blocked me msn, blocked me facebook. Everywhere also block.
But who cares, I know if I want to find you, I can, because we have SO MANY MUTUAL FRIENDS in facebook, how can we not find each other.

The third girl, was the recent one.
LOL, that was the record la.
It was cool for half a year, but it was all A SHOW, A DRAMA, everything was so fake.
We were like telephone buddies, and I know, no matter how much she WILL DENY now that we weren't close, I will still say we were, because she trusted me with issues that of course I won't want to discuss here.
But still in the end it comes to an end, where she didn't let me know what went wrong and go off, and just love seeing me emo hor?

So all three of them now, are no longer close to me anymore.
Maybe yea just one, which might have some connected feel.
But whatever it is, is no longer like last time.

My point is, I just don't understand.
Why things have to be like that?
From start till the end, I did try to tell them, hey if you don't want me as your boyfriend is FINE with me okay, just take me as your friend, and if we are close, just yeaa maintain until the CLOSE FRIEND la..

OF COURSE when you have your boyfriend already, I won't be that stupid to bug you often anymore right?
NOPE, non of them get this message that I wanted to tell them.
All they see is.. OHHH I GAVE THEM SO MUCH stuff and babllablablal means I want them as my girlfriend and ONLY my girlfriend.

They didn't know that okay, if you insist, then of course I will know la that NO MATTER what, if you marry someone, have kids already, FUCK ALREADY, pussy loose already.. still la I want you as my wife meh?
(This statement will make you people look at me differently)
I mean seriously laa.. they just have this feeling of..
no matter what my true intention is to get them to like me.

They didn't know that no matter what, I have a LIMITS there whereby I won't go kao people's girlfriend and I won't want to go like people's wife.

Then again, they would say to me, but if they don't "hurt" me I won't give up.
They just don't see that all they have to do is just.. be honest, and let me know what's wrong and so on, and then we just go on like how we were la don't go sohai go think that what crazy stuff I would do for them.
They didn't know that, I could do better and better for the one who is more WORTH.

See if you were to compare what I gave Xue and the other two, it was much GRAND okay.
Compare the other two.
So I would die saying that, hey! It comes from the heart.
If you treat me nice, I will do it nicely for you, as in the Graph of How much they care for me is PROPORTIONAL towards the effort I would put for them.

The more they care for me, the more I would do for them.
But they all didn't learn what is ASYMPTOTE.

Yup, asymptote does exist.
True, very true..
That the more they care for me, the more I will "die" for them.
But they didn't know that UNTIL certain extend I can never REACH the OPTIMUM effort.
I will NEVER give MY BEST OF MY BEST to them if they will never have "feelings" for me.

I'll show you a NEW GRAPH.

So there are two (x) point there I would like to show, one is the FRIENDS POINT, and the another one is the LOVERS POINT.

Look at the FRIEND's REGION, of course as friend, no matter how much I do, I can't do the "SUPERB" things for them, and furthermore look at the CHANGES, is like they care so much I only move A BIT.
While the LOVER's REGION, love and care for me a bit, I'll quickly DO SO MUCH STUFF for them.

Yes, do you think that I can do a lot as a friend?
Whereby I can't say I'll stay overnight at your place,
I can't kiss you or hug you if you want someone to be REAL CLOSE with you,
can't make you the HAPPIEST if I can never know what could make you the happiest girl,

Can't make you the happiest girl because only the BEST MAN in your eyes can do so.

RIGHT?

So as I see myself, the function is such that there is my limit as I can't go pass the LOVER's REGION.
You think I have INFINITE ability to go on?
I am not God.

I can't.

Girls, THAT IS THE ASYMPTOTE that you have set,
So no matter how SPECIAL I do for you, I just will never make my function such that it will be on and on whereby I will give it all and special for you, then you sayang me more and so on.

But then it all comes to one stupid word, yea "comfort".

It takes A LOT of courage to confess.
Till today I never get to confess to them in PERSON.
Because I don't get a chance.
Because they will run away if I do so.
Because that is something they don't want too.

You think I felt comfortable confessing?
You think I felt comfortable going all for you if you don't feel comfortable?
You think I still want to go for the girl who marries other guy and feel "comfortable"? NAH.

That girl whom is my friend ask me,
"You sure you want to tell her? If things happen again you will sad you know."

I told her, yes it may happen, but I will REGRET for not letting her know.

Hence my conclusion is.
I'm glad that I manage to do something before a goodbye.
As for Xue, it was a GOODBYE that driven me to go all the way to Singapore to celebrate her birthday.
I should have prepare myself and tell myself it was a goodbye rather than thinking is a 50-50 chance.

When a guy likes a girl, the feeling is nice,
when the girl talks to the guy,
care for the guy,
able to give a smile to the guy,
most important still able to be good friends despite of unwanted outcomes.

So as for the next girl that I like, I will like, or so.
Hah, what would be my goodbye gift then?
A goodbye and a big thank you for being my friend to give that OHMNESS everyday.
That ohmness always comes with a smile.

Not everyone gives you a smile willingly,
Customer service, receptionist, service worker give you a smile because is their JOB,
but nice girl friends give you a smile because they just like you as you are, a good friend to them.

When I meet Xue, I know her smile WAS GENUINE, so does one of them,
and.. maybe the next one coming?

So I guess this is "reality",
whereby most girl just can't be cool with it facing the guy who has feelings for them and they don't.
If there is a girl who is crazy in love with me, and I may not be in love with her.
I will tell her that I won't want that to happen.
Is not cool, is a LAME ROUTINE of life.
So please try to make things such that we can maintain as we are.

And I.. will have to think of a new way of how to present my last act to the girl I will like in future if she doesn't likes me.
Because.

When a guy likes a girl, and a girl doesn't likes him back.
It will be like a stupid scene such that there is no friendship, nor UNDERSTANDING between both parties.
Cold, and sadness, and all the horrible things you could think of.
All the good times will become NOTHING, as if the guy DID SOMETHING WRONG to the girl.

Not comfortable hor, scary hor..
They doesn't know that when a guy likes a girl, he is the WEAKEST person when he is facing that girl.
Weak until can seriously die.

If I could learn kage bunshin no jutsu, I'll show you how my clones would die after the emoness.
Too bad I just have one live, cannot simply suicide.

When a guy likes a girl, and the feeling develops.
Is a dead end, is either they get closer or WORST.
Never like can still maintain good friends.

NEVER..
Never..
never..

Even after they together and broke off,
MANY I SEE.. all never contact each other or still become good friends.

Can't people see the beauty that knowing someone and able to be good friends is such a BLESSING?
Think you can be friends with anyone meh. TIU!

Competition and Cruelty.

2010-07-03T19:28:00.003+08:00

Competition is just a simple noun.
It is an INTERESTING noun because people and other matters compete for one purpose, to win something.

Hence in a mathematical function it is called many to one function.

2.30am's match of World cup Ghana Vs Uruguay has shown me how cruel could competition be.

I've learned in a long time ago that in competition, even if you lose 0.01 or lose a SMALL sum..
Is still a LOSE, and nobody wants to lose.

But in competition, there MUST be a loser and there MUST be a winner.
The winner takes it all...... ABBA had their song about it.

So how did Ghana lost?

The Ghanian header the ball in, and this Suarez actually STOP IT with his hand.
To deny the goal.

Okay, is fair that the REFEREE gave the Ghanians a penalty kick, which is a KILLER PENALTY KICK to decide that Ghana will be the winner.

UNFORTUNATELY, the one who strike it, he shot and hit the post and the ball flew away.
Then Uruguay BEAT them on PENALTIES SHOOTOUT

Suppose to be the Ghanians to win, and yet because of a mistake Uruguay won.
That's competition.
I hate such situation..

But yet that is how it goes, even the SUAREZ looks like is cheating.

That's why I really wish that there is a perfect system with anti cheat UP THERE for competition, and we would all be competeting fairly.

What nonsense is this?

2010-06-25T01:31:00.003+08:00

Another... sad story again ar?

Sienz.

I've just started my degree, like FINALLY at such "old" age.
With a LONG DELAY before I would spend a HUGE AMOUNT of money, giving them ALLOWANCE to save up for me.

Starting my degree with SEVEN SUBJECTS.
Looks quite heavy.
NOW IS WEEK 4. 10 more eff-ing weeks to go.

Well I'm not blogging about the thing that is really BOTHERING me now, but I guess u can just find it in this entry..

It makes me really eff up, and I really want to give up.
YES, give up.

Don't tell me that I should be strong be positive and all the shit.
Because telling me that WON'T MAKE THINGS RIGHT.

So what am I suppose to do?

LOL, I don't know.
I will blog it and update you kepoh chi about my KANASAI STRUGGLE.
Did I make it through or not it all depends..

I don't know will I make it in this sem with a good CGPA like maybe 3+?
I don't know will I even have time to study with that STUPID THING ON MIND THAT I HAVE TO DO TO PROCEED MY DAILY CONSUMPTION.
I don't know I don't know I don't know.

Christians always confidently say, when they have problem, they have faith in Jesus and then faith will carry them through.
Is been a long time.

From the day till I was born till now, yes I can confidently tell people how God has sustained me, how God has change me, change my life, perhaps provides in some of my needs.

NOT TO FORGET, things that RESTRICTS ME to become the Shung Jiu I want to be.
Things that somehow restrict me to not to advance or something.

I really wish too, to really testify OUT LOUD how superb can God work in my life and so on, to end the stupid confusion whether God exist or not blablablablalbal.

But then.. I still see stupid things right in front of me.

For those Christians out there who read this, don't tell me how God is good and all,
I believe he is good, I believe he has his way and so on..
But sometimes is just DISAPPOINTING to see more DISAPPOINTING event happening day by day and you couldn't do anything about it.

Most of the time, I hear testimonies from those SUCCESSFUL people, they are all..
NOT IN A BAD CONDITION or perhaps born from a rich background, and you know.. God SUSTAINED THEM and yeayea they can PRAISE GOD.

Just too rare I see those who are like me,
GO through shits, and then come out of shits, prove to the WORLD THAT HEY GOD BRINGS YOU OUT FROM SHITS.

Yes. Is just TOO RARE.
Of course I do hear story of how those war zone countries how they survive and all blaablbla... BUT their country is still having war after they survive and so on.

I am not disappointed with God, maybe I am, but I know is just very small feel of it.
But right now I'm just for once, feeling so weak because I am going through an event of sohai event which I feel that I shouldn't go through it.

So pls wait for after my week 14, I will just live on and.. just go through it..
Maybe it suck, maybe it turn out good..

If turn out good, I'll make sure I post how did God help me through it.
Faith eh?

Go koreaa... Go korea....a, why Korea?

2010-06-17T21:56:00.008+08:00

Yea whatever you call it.

As we all know,
South Korea and Japan are both one of the LEADING ASIAN teams for Football.

But are they really good?

Now I know that South Korea in their home ground they have reached Semi Finals in the last 2 world cup.

They never fail to win African country Togo, besides they beat Italy before in penalties, and SPAIN!

Indeed is SURPRISING.

It shows that HEY, they are not noobs.

So what I say?
Indeed I'm very proud that as an Asian there exist an Asian team who can play at a CERTAIN standard which we could say not like shit.

But the thing is, Korea is still NOT IN THAT STAGE/LEVEL yet.
Now I'm talking about the OVERALL team.

Lets first take a look at Argentina's team.

Look at the amount of Argentina players who played OUTSIDE of their own country/country zone.

As for Korea, they are just STUCK in Asia.

Hence is no doubt that they(Argentina) have much more EXPOSURE compare to our Korea.

So what's there to fight?
They have the UNSTOPPABLE Lionel Messi, that only for the time being the SPECIAL one has a solution in stopping him.

Jose Mourinho the special one, ex Inter Milan manager.

His team manage to overcome the HUGE THREAT of Lionel Messi, makes him wasn't able to be a threat at that MOMENT which consider a big achievement at that time because Messi was and perhaps now still UNSTOPPABLE.

-having Messi playing on the field = more than one player playing in a field.
-having more EXPOSURE = variety of perceptions, more IDEAS in playing as a team.

Is like Argentina is FULLY GEAR UP.

So you people CAN'T expect Korea to WIN this match against the obvious strong team.
BUT! A good play for Korea where they don't lose like shit or perhaps a draw.
A win for them should be a BONUS.

Korea has improved compare to the past world cups.
But in COMPETITION You improve, your opponent IMPROVES too.
Is not like in EXAMINATION if you improve you can get an A+, NO is not like that.

Competition, if you lose by 0.000000001 point, you just lose.
That is why competition has some kind of excitement when both teams got an equal chance of winning and you'll see who is the best of the best or perhaps the more LUCKIER ones.

But as for Korea Vs Argentina, Korea has lose out a lot.
That is why if you were to NOTICE the one that is PERFORMING and SCORING are those who are EXPOSED to TOP QUALITY training from the EURO clubs like Park Ji Sung, and the Chu-Young, perhaps Cha Du Ri.

3 vs 11?

Furthermore Argentina MUST secure a WIN/qualify to go knock out round ELSE Maradona would be in deep shit.
People will BOO him.

So PLEASE people, know the team's background, study the odds before EXPECTING the results.

You can support, but DON'T EXPECT HIGH if the odds of winning is low.
Korea got teamwork, Agree.
Korea can do a sudden attack, Agree.
Korea is better than Argentina(for the time being 2010), Disagree.

my father predict Argentina can't win the World Cup even they may make it to the finals.
Reason?

Read back Argentina', s club history you'll know why, one of their winning was more like "cheating".
So he say that judgement will fall on them.

I kinda agree with his justification, till a certain extend, but I think they CAN also win the world cup this year too because of Lionel Messi.
He deserve this Cup.

USA Vs England 1-1

2010-06-13T04:36:00.007+08:00

World Cup has already started.

Surprisingly Korea beat the European Team Greece
2-0.
I won't talk about that, but I will talk about the match that YOU MALAYSIANS are blinded with.

SERIOUSLY, England for the moment is NOT a good team.
They can't qualify for Euro 2008, they can't win Portugal losing SO BADLY by players one by one sent off end up the lost in a penalties shootout.

What's more?

ONE BY ONE, their players have WOMEN problems outside.
Be it David Beckham, John Terry, Joe Cole, and so on..
http://www.top10world.net/sports/top-10-affairs-of-england-football-player/
Their injuries such as Stevie G, RIO FERDINAND?
They do not have a GOALKEEPER which you could say is really SCARY like Cech and Van De Sar.

So many PROBLEMS here and there, oh not to forget..
THEY ARE ALL PLAYING IN a WELL KNOWN CLUB in their OWN country ENGLAND.

So EVERYTHING is just so... ENGLAND STYLE.
They just DON'T KNOW that, the ITALIANS are smarter than them, SPAIN are smarter than them, not to forget there is Brazil and Argentina.

WHAT MAKES ENGLAND SO GOOD that it just become the favourite?

They used to have SEXY DAVID BECKHAM doing an ad for Armani Underwear.

What else? They have the ALL TIME FAVORITE GERRARD and LAMPARD, perhaps Terry.

and ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONEYYYY....

Screw it, i admit that GERRARD and LAMPARD are good players.
Having Terry there teaming up with lampard is also a GOOD combination.

BUT!

Don't forget, this is NOT CHELSEA, NOT LIVERPOOL, NEITHER CHELSEA EITHER!
IS ENGLAND!

So Please MALAYSIAN who SUPPORTS ENGLAND BLINDLY.

You can SUPPORT THEM, but don't say until they SO GENG.

Overall the game against USA, the good goal was the Steven Gerrard's one.
REALLY GOOD.
BUT HE's ALONE??!!?

He's working so hard ALONE, and the WHOLE TEAM MECHANISM is NOT MOVING AT ALL.

Really I would say F grade performance for the TEAM, although they have A++ grade player.
I say that I might agree with you that England can be a good team if COACHES/MANAGERS like Jose Mourinho were to take over.
Capella seems like a really LOVING coach, but then maybe is just not his luck that his team can't play as expected.

As for my prediction, I think England will DISAPPOINT you Malaysian England fans out there, so if you want to gamble and bet on England to win, go ahead because I've just WON on the bet USA vs England I took USA because that friend of mine gave me 1/2 ball ^^

This is the Blunder by England, I shouted when it went in the GOAL.
So funny but I really pity him, because I don't know how people are going to blame him, and so on.
The feeling is really.. not nice..
So lets see what the MEDIA has to say about this.

For me I would say that, so what if that didn't score?
England ALREADY play like SHIT.
They are NOT playing as expected with such LEVEL of skills they have in each and ever player.
They have EVERYTHING and whole damn thing to WIN.

But their attacks and TEAM PLAY sux.
Is like you see already, you know in your heart that England can play better if you were to control them in a Stimulator game like Winning Eleven or Fifa the game.

Well, I guess in future as England keeps on losing so does MANUTD..
people in Malaysia will stop supporting them as if there were like Gods.
In fact, the one thing I kinda make me go o.O is that GIRLS SUPPORT ENGLAND/MANUTD because THEIR BOYFRIEND supports the team, why the boyfriend support them?

Because they "geng" maa..... =.=

ManUtd good in BPL/EPL/England Agree
ManUtd KINGS OF EUROPE Disagree
Above Average in EUROPE Strongly Agree

England top class team Disagree
England have a lot of good players Agree
England's way of attacking is
INTERESTING Disagree

So conclusion, in FOOTBALL is about a TEAM, just like how INTER MILAN WON Barcelona.
Is the WHOLE TEAM against Messi/IMBRAMHIMOVIC.
Of course... a little bit of LUCK.

Believe me, LUCK DOES COME IN PLAY, else everyone has already became RICH by gambling in football.

Lastly, this is for all the SEXY GIRLS OUT THERE.. your sexy man's epic face when USA SCORED A GOAL AGAINST ENGLAND.

So for once, please listen to a nobody wants to listen's "voice" from a guy like me.
ENGLAND can go back ENGLAND to fry some eggs.
PIF!
I doubt they can perform well this year.

This is my VICTORY FB comment ^^V
Two people ask me to DREAM ON, and XDXD England DIDN'T WIN!
WAKA WAKA EH EH!

My Musical Journey

2010-06-06T00:58:00.005+08:00

Sometimes I look back, like how I used to attend classes for Music and how did I gained the interest in music, then how did my progress went ever since I learned music.

Is a long journey, did have some results too, yet I feel quite disappointed at times too.

I started of like how every SUPPORTIVE parents would want their kids to learn music,
the reason why I get to learn it is because my god-grandmother was a music teacher who teaches piano, hence you gotta know..
She could pass down some skill to me without charging tuition fee.

Hence my mum was like so supportive let me simply bang on the TOY keyboard and so on.
So apparently she was looking like some RESEARCHER like that see me like got "talent" and then decided to agree like to let my god-grandmother to guide me in my Music Journey.

I started of with Yamaha School Music,
From JMC, JXC, JAC
Click here to find out what it stands for

While most of other kids started off with the usual ABRSM which stands for Associated Board of Royal Music.
http://www.abrsm.org/?page=home
Yes this is the WELL-KNOWN exam that most people go for their exam.

For instance if you hear those aunty asking you:"What grade are you arrr you piano?"
Yes they are 99.9% referring to that examination.

So Yamaha Music School taught me in a different ways, and they uses ELECTRONE to teach you, aka you know errm organ, electronic keyboard.. whatever you call it.

Is weird, I know, but they teach you in hearing, sight reading, and beat and so on.
They don't EMPHASIZE on those BORING parts of the piano, yes they didn't really emphasize one SCALES too, but ABRSM.. really F* up because you have so many scales to practice everyday, practice until you sien.

So one of the things I HATE in playing the piano is..
PRACTICE.. at that time, they was the ONLY thing that my mother will ask me to PRACTICE.

Sigh, is just too bad my mum doesn't know what is muscle memory,
else I would be motivated to practice because I KNOW what is the reason for you to practice.

As time goes on,
I feel that piano sux.
I mean.. I dislike the posture when you play the piano, I prefer guitar's posture, and HOLDING a guitar makes me feel that I'm holding a sword or a weapon that can SWING around like those rockers.

Try comparing this...

and this..

Which is cooler?

Definitely the cool one will be a guitar, and piano just make you look more you know..
GENTLE.

Gugu laa.. I so small size, want me to look even more gentle?
Then I become the cute little mouse already.

Then at that time my mum was like.. waa boy in future I will let you learn Guitar, let you learn Drums.. blablablabla..

Yes, I was DAMN ENTHUSIASTIC to learn drums and guitar.

SADLY..
Till today..
All my mum ever say this word.
"No money no money no money."

So there is where I felt that it is MEANINGLESS to play that stupid instrument:Piano.

I hate it, I hate the posture, and I hate how the STRINGS/HARP sound..
WHOOPS! Guitar is string too, at least it sounds more cooler compare to that stupid piano like so ugly the posture.

I don't want to look so "gentle".
I want to look a bit more.. AGGRESIVE.. lolx.

As time goes by, I still go on.. playing that stupid instrument,
I even ascend my grade to grade 4 and then grade 5 ABRSM.
Failed Grade 5 practical, Succeed on my FIRST THEORY EXAM for ABRSM which is also GRADE 5.

Miss Voon was my coach, sigh I wish I could find her again.
I'm suppose to go for practical and theory, but then she said, since I NEVER take theory exam and I need to ZOOM my theory from grade 1-5 so that's why the time for my practical she took it to teach me theory.

She describe to me how she need to rush like a midnight train.
IN THE END.. I got a MERIT for my Theory exam Grade 5, yes ABRSM.

My brother was also learning too, but seems like my mum didn't really focus on him in the end because he was for lazy, rebellious, reluctant to practice and so on..
Well my sis was unlucky that she STOP half way. SIGH..
Reason I won't write it out here lets move on to my story.

After my GRADE 5 exam, I wanted to PROCEED to GRADE 6, since I got my Grade 5 theory cert.
BUT sigh.. my mum was like no money no money.
F la..(you know why I say F as you read on..)

In the mean time, my mum always like encourage me to PERFORM when she goes to someone house and I am there with her with that house got a piano.

I UNLIKE my friend Andrew Chu who like to SHOW OFF his skills playing the piano,
I just DISLIKE playing the STUPID piano, because I'm just a Grade 4 or 5 pianist?
Like what's there to show off? I haven't master a lot of SEXY CLASSICAL pieces like Canon in D, Fantasie impromptu, Toccata, and so on.

Furthermore, my mum wanna act like a PRO like wanna show off
"Waa see my son so geng".

F again..
What so proud about it? She also never ENCOURAGE me to be the BEST in my music journey, providing me ALL THE WAY till Grade 8 or perhaps Diploma.

So in the end, I just play some songs by downloading piano sheets to KEEP my INTEREST/ so called "talent".

At that moment, I always visualize myself as someone who can play Guitar, Piano, and Drums JUST LIKE JUSTIN BIEBER.

I was Form 4, Form 5.. till after Form 5..
I finally used my so called "talent" for someone else.

To be honest, SINGING was NEVER on my mind since young.
I DISLIKE singing also, because I find that playing the guitar already look cool enough. But lol.. now only I realize that yea if I were to obtain that skill it would be great too.

So with my horrible voice I compose and sing it,
of course the tune hit a lot of attention at one time, :D

Well I'm just applying what is LEARNED during Grade 5 theory exam where you have to compose your own songs.

Nothing special either.

So till then I discover HOW MUCH I REALLY LOVE MUSIC, and how much I REALLY REALLY WANT IT all along...

Today, my mum always pester me to work part time etc etc.
Is just SO FUCKING SAD that she didn't provide me with a GRADE 8 or a Diploma.
Else I can be a PART TIME MUSIC TEACHER who suck up all the MONEY from RICH PARENTS.

Perhaps rich aunty too..

I believe I could even do MORE than that.

I've got my guitar, and it was my god-grandmother+grandfather who bought it for me and my sis.
Loving it <3.

But now sis always use it, and I need to spend time with guitar soon again.

Right now, I got so much passion, but the effing thing is like I don't have my Grade 8 I feel so effing discourage or sad..
I'm also damn DISAPPOINTED with my mother who is like..
Support half way, and then like didn't let me COMPLETE my grade 8.

With my Grade 8, I could do a lot of things.
She doesn't effing knows that if I have my grade 8, MOST CERTAINLY I will go PERFORM KAO KAO CONFIDENTLY at anytime if she ask me to.

HEY GRADE 8 achiever PERFORMING, the feeling is sure to be AWESOME.

BUT. Then again.
Sigh, although this is HARDSHIP for me and so on.
I should think positively and try to get my Grade 8 at the end of the day.

I must think of my own method without blaming my HALF-supportive mother who doesn't know anything about LONG TERM plan.

Then again.. this is another SOHAI DRAMA of my music journey.
Currently, I think my level is like.. not to say that geng, but not to say TOTALLY noob/beginner.

I can read notes, the rate may not be grade 8 standard, but I think I know how to play around with the notes :D

If my mum were to let me learn guitar, piano, drums, and singing..
I will be Justin Bieber Malaysian version already.

Yes I know, there are singers/musician who doesn't even COMPLETE their grades and so on. But to me, I feel that TAKING EXAMS for instrument UNLEASH the SERIOUS Shungz out of me.

At such stage la I know myself. =)

But what the heck?
Now the "No Money" word always comes out from my mother's mouth.

So how will I go through it?
One of the thing I expect this year is, seriously ENHANCE my music skill to the extend where it AMAZE me.

I may be UNREALISTIC but I know my targets are not to say can't make it.
I know I'm learning something that will surely amaze people.. SOON.

Till then, this is my emo/"exciting" journey of my Music Journey.

I would now describe myself as a STUCK MUSICIAN.
Stuck at a level, stuck to progress further, stuck because of this and that..
Blablabalbalblablaala

P/S: I know this post may sound a little like I'm very fussy and demanding.
But well, for most of the time, I really feel frustrated when I think of other stuff where my mum didn't support me ALL THE WAY till I complete it.
So please bear with my knncb thoughts.

Stuck.

2010-06-04T00:24:00.003+08:00

I once can drive car around my area,
now.. stuck in a condo with no car.

=(

First week around the new area, wasn't cool as I thought.
No car, sux to the max.

No internet either, cause haven't apply yet.

Sigh.. furthermore, timetable sux even harder..
Hence.

Again again again..
Need to think of a quick solution asap.

Else.. I guess I have to get stuck in a sucky routine, can't do what I want to do.
End up can only tell people this word I hate the most.

"BUSY".

Dramatic.. again.. booring.

2010-05-31T17:29:00.002+08:00

As I said before,
my life is so dramatic that perhaps my life story could worth so much that could make me rich. Seriously.. lol

I mean.. every year also got some sad drama that I will have to go through,
all these SAD DRAMA always stop me from achieving the me that I want to really become.

Sien...

I have a lot of interest that if I enhance it, I can make it sell out too =D
Perhaps build up my portfolio, sadly all these SAD DRAMA just stop me.

What are those?

Lol, I will reveal it when I overcome with these sad drama..
=D

As for now, lets just see how the eff am I going to play along.

If I blog, I know I can make it dramatic that you readers would want to read and read.
Oh wait, I need to obtained one more skill to make it interesting too =D

Whatever it is, I will be expecting a lot from myself this year.

Wahh I abandon my blog again... lol

2010-05-28T02:29:00.003+08:00

You see.. blogging sux man.

I abandon my blog again, aihh planning for an INSPIRATION blog entry sometimes takes time too.

Anyway.. for my followers out there.
My adventure in a new environment starts 1st of June.

My 21st birthday also coming soon.

I expect a breakthrough for myself this year.
As in, I don't know.. maybe.. what I never do before, I'll do now..
Is like.. MY TIME IS NOW. ><

That's like currently on my mind..
So what I didn't or yet to achieve, I'll try to achieve.

That's where I see myself like blogging the adventures that will inspire others.

BUT THEN now I see... waaa I like to online and play game.
GG.com.. how am I gonna blog??

I guess I will have a new way of blogging. SOON.

OH! WORLD CUP IS COMING SOON...
I hope I will blog more.. and SHARE more.. xD

I lost my phone =(

2010-05-25T19:31:00.003+08:00

Sorry friends, especially girls whom I save your number at my phone.
Now your number is at risk that some other unknown people may know your number too.

I hate losing my phone, the one that hurt most is that those contacts you can't get them back all.
Some because you've hardly contact them then you forget, some because they'd became ur enemy =O, some didn't wish that you ever exist, some regretted knowing you... blablalbal

I am a person who does not delete contact,
but now I guess.. those contacts are gone already.
I am very sure that I'll forget who is in my contact list that I might need to contact in the future.

My contact surely worth more than my phone.
Sigh, of all times to be careless.. I have to be careless on such day, and not being lucky enough to have a kind person to give me back.

I have found a phone and gave it back to someone before 8 years ago.
Now I've lost my phone, and I know someone took it, and he instead kept it.

好心有好报。 It only works LONG TERM... or unexpectedly.
Too bad that I can't just tell God to claim back my reward of deed just like that..

"Hey, last time someone lost his phone, I gave him back, why not now my turn?" =(

Anyway.. such event happen, is good for someone else. =)
Because I can't remember her number.

Aih, somehow I also wish that losing phone is nothing (for those who can get a new phone without feeling the pain of spending money again).
For those people in this category.. rich people.
In fact they are happy actually they lose their phone because they can go SHOPPING again and go ask around.. ehh what new phone should I buy.

Pif.. whatever la. =(
If you are my friend that contacts me, pls do msn me tell me ur number ok?

Justin Bieber- The New Kid in Hollywood

2010-05-20T21:01:00.002+08:00

I didn't know this kid existence until I watch this video by Peter Chao.. and of course his famous hit "Baby" through the 2nd Peter Chao video.

No dancing in the bowling alley. LOL.

So that's how was it.
I never went to hear his song first, until it was aired on radio all day long.

I like the accompaniment of this song.
I really thought it was a girl singing, couldn't believe is a guy singing at first.

But yup, is just God's gift that he has such high pitch or vocal range you may say.
But who cares, sound like girl, but Michael Jackson's voice also sound quite feminine. So I'm sure they sign him with a REASON.

There are other talents out there I know.
But what I would like to say is, lol people SHOULDN'T keep on teasing him about his puberty and so on, you can tease once or twice.. but go on and on teasing is too much.

LEAVE JUSTIN BIEBER ALONE! XD

Still a B Grade Student, Not Yet an A Grade Student

2010-05-15T16:23:00.008+08:00

Before I begin I shall show how's my results, and the grading system.

This is my results

This is the grading system

As the theory you aim high, if you fail you'll at least fall somewhere in the sky works for this time =D

At the start of this sem 3 I have a goal to work towards to which is to really aim to score for this sem as Li Yi have set the standard for me.
REALLY MOTIVATING.

The rest of the entries can be read over here
http://shungzz.blogspot.com/2010/03/stuff-that-i-discover.html

This few subjects are like EASY as in you don't need so much understanding then you can make it a good grade, so all I have to do is put effort to go for an A.
Definitely you'll need to do some memorizing but OF COURSE there are FUN way to memorize LIVELY!

I know the way, I know how to do it, and pretty much know how to achieve it BUT all I need to do is .

JUST DO IT

So as usual, ALL THREE subject also got ASSIGNMENT.

1)Management assignment fail because COMMUNICATION ERROR, Mid term was so-so.
2)Web Page, I don't know about my web page assignment marks, I think my mid term was like 50 or 60/100 according to Anne, another 10% of web page I pretty much SCORE it full marks with LUCK xD.
3)English For Communication I don't know how much I score for me drama.

Pretty much all I wanted to achieve is AT LEAST an A- worst come to worst.
Because I NEVER DO WELL in ACADEMIC you know.. those exams... feels really FRUSTRATING that so many years study also still cannot reach a HIGHER GRADING STANDARDS? Even those SIMPLE SUBJECT ALSO I DON'T GET A, sometimes =(.

To me, exam is just something like you have to go through, that was way few years back.
Right now, I AM CONFIDENT TO SAY that exam is really NOTHING.

I don't know how well I do in finals, but I think I should get at least an A- because I KNOW ALMOST ALL THE ANSWER, but perhaps my overall marks(coursework+finals) didn't make it.
The gap for B+ and A- is just 5 marks.

I may get 73 or 74 overall but is OKAY.

I'm just glad that I FINALLY know how to START PREPARING EARLY for exams.
I GOT SLACK! Really! I DID! But I DID discover another METHOD how to self motivate myself to study. =)

I'm like enjoying.. till even exam time also like lazy to study, at some period of the 7 weeks.
But I now KNOW how to plan my time to STUDY ENOUGH to maintain grades, and go on to do my USUAL stuff, SPECIAL stuff and just be me.

Indulging in games, sleep, sports and so on =D

I'm HALF WAY THERE, I KNOW IT.
It sounds very optimistic.

Yes indeed,
but I still need to really go and put THAT effort to really be a SOLID A1 student.
Once I reach that stage, I wish to tell others too.

"EXAM IS NOTHING!
EXAM IS JUST SOMETHING TO TEST YOU, BRING OUT THE TRUE POTENTIAL OF YOU."

Those subjects, I never learn before, but yes using 7 weeks time I could maintain my B grade paste, but maybe not solid A1 but maybe an A-.
As for English, sigh.. I think I really need to work on something liao.

Towards serious to study, and efficiency of time management! xD

When I can manage my time well,
I will NEVER FEEL BUSY and yet can enjoy on stuff that I want to indulge in =)

BUT! During sem3, I didn't play any game.
At most only facebook game which requires you to click, and wait for it to LOAD.
SO STUPID.

Now I have my RO, perhaps this Stephy wants to call me for dota, and I'm in ANOTHER ENVIRONMENT to study.
So how can I cope with DISTRACTIONS? I hope my roommate Pi Han will be the one who can help a little because he is a Math's FANATIC.

Math's people are SERIOUS PEOPLE in some way because you cannot simply do Math and get the correct answer, SERIOUSLY.
Because a Math brain think differently, perhaps in some sense more BRILLIANT, and of course they can stand out of the crowd because Math is like a subject when you see someone is good at it you'll go like.. WAAAA IQ High.

Whatever that means I don't care, but I HONESTLY hope that such mathematical housemate could motivate me to do more Math as my course require GOOD MATHEMATICAL SKILL TOO =) WILL I MAKE IT?

I've never DO WELL in Math yet, but I remember I did well before, the feeling was SUPERB =D

Theory based subjects, ahh what is theory? Can eat one ar?

Easypha-max I believe? MEP? Ethics?

2010-05-12T16:53:00.008+08:00

If you are my HARDCORE reader, or maybe you just love to stalk me.
Please read this entry before you proceed.
http://shungzz.blogspot.com/2010/05/business-ethics.html

So yesterday, my friend took me to this seminar about easypha-max.
Their website is.
http://www.easypha-max.com/
I decided to go and LISTEN to this seminar because..

He told me that he is doing this "part time" job, am I interested? But he said he can't really have the ability to explain everything in detail what is it about. Hence this will be an opportunity to FIND OUT.

Apparently, to me their scheme is just like another Multi-Level Marketing scheme(MLM). But apparently they have their FANCY name for it called,Micro Entrepreneurship Program (MEP).

What you need to do?
Is just recruit 2 people, and then recruit another, and another.. the more people in your downline, the more you earn.

Of course, they have their PRODUCTS where you can purchase using the points that you first invest on.

Is funny.. seriously.
What so funny is that, my friend leave me to let other of his seniors to convince me AFTER THE TALK BY SOME DIRECTOR who's already making lotsa $$ and could enjoy all the riches in the world and sing MONEY MONEY MONEY by Abba.

Okay, I listen..
but I first told them this.
To come out that MONEY I really don't have.
Yes, RM3k or RM1k I REALLY don't have.

I ethically speak the TRUTH to this company whom they keep saying YOU CAN BE JUST LIKE THEM EARNING BIG BUCKS with ethical truth testimony.

So how do I view on such scheme?
Well, is just simple, you invest in your money.
Your upline gets to earn, and then the organization got some money too to DO OTHER BUSINESSES. Of course in return you'll get profit, IF there is more DOWNLINE =.=

But HONESTLY SPEAKING..
They keep telling me like if I make this decision to do, yea they can surely help me to make it to get back my invested $, ROI which is return of investment will be a short period of time.

I tell you, ALL CONVINCING TACTIC I hear until wow I really could maybe learn some of those tricks to convince people to get what I want.
From 10pm++ from one guy to another guy till another girl.
CONVINCE and CONVINCE and CONVINCE..

But I was like trying to tell them,
HEY 3k LER? or 1k?
I SERIOUSLY CAN'T GET THAT MONEY.

They suggested to me, to borrow money and so on...
I'm like?? Borrowing 1k or 3k?
Which friend will seriously borrow me?

I confidently tell them like, if there is friends to borrow me I WILL AND WON'T MIND RISKING and do it 100%.

WHY?
Because MY FRIENDS TRUST ME, so I should TRUST MYSELF IN THIS TOO.

But SORRY easypha-max.
I as someone who can get CASH from LIMITED SOURCES can't afford your plan.

I've told my friend who intro-ed me to this,
I say, if you dare to borrow me to start with you, I WILL GO.
But well, of course you don't get a positive YES.

So I called up my friend, M.E.
We discuss about it, well I told him, you want to risk this cash?
If you dare to risk this cash, I won't mind doing it and GIVE YOU BACK the investment+profit. =)

Then M.E told me, yea this kind of thing also if 3k or 1k is NO HARM for you, NO HARM trying. But of course he also didn't have that much or perhaps may not want to go GUNG HO to give out so much for this.

So now since I don't think I can get the 3k or 1k, I don't think I can just simply try my LUCK on this anymore ;)

Well I know from how they advertise EASY PHAMAX, it shows HOW BIG their organization is just like AMWAY and COSWAY. With SUPERB AD that has been launched and so on...
It does GIVE PEOPLE CONFIDENCE to trust in them.

MLM business THERE IS PEOPLE WHO EARNED.
No DOUBT I BELIEVE 100% that there are SUCCESSORS or TOP GAINERS for Multilevel marketing.

Multi level marketing gives people and OPPORTUNITY to get side income,
Multi level marketing is one of the way to really get cash fast if you succeed.
As compared to being SUCCESSFUL in your OWN EFFORT, TIME is SHORTEN.
As compared to GAMBLING 4d Toto, your CHANCE is HIGHER

The speaker also promote, NO RISK, HIGH PROFIT.

BUT EVERYONE WILL ALSO THINK.
IF IS THAT EASY TO EARN? Why not everyone become RICH?

Then again, think of ETHICS.

Is MLM ethically WRONG?

Alright, for those EASY phamax gainers.
Is okay you deny that easy phamax is not a MLM scheme.
If I EARN SO MUCH $, why the fuck I want to fuck the one who help me to gain all the cash and richest in the world?

I think to me, MLM could be ETHICALLY RIGHT and WRONG.
It depends on the one who started their SCHEME/PLAN.

First,
MLM is supposingly giving a chance for EVERYONE to have a job you know.
They encourage people from all ages to join, and when they have a group of people who joined, they are the organization's WORKER to MARKET THEIR PRODUCT.

MARKETING THROUGH REFERENCE with a LEVEL of HIERARCHY.

The level of hierarchy is to ENCOURAGE you to refer more person and in return of your EFFORT of trusting them to start spreading the news, they reward you more if your downline recruit more and more to MOTIVATE you to work for them more.

Why not? Downline do the work and you get money, who won't want to promote more of their product?

So you see, secondly it save cost on ADVERTISEMENT.
Because WE ALL KNOW HOW GOSSIP SPREAD FASTER THAN NEWS, or whatever news that spread through people mouth are like.. @#$%^&^&*(( fast.

A:"Omg! She's pragnant?"
B:"WHAT? Really ar..."

next day

B:"Ehh you know I heard o, that she's pragnant"
C:"Really???? arrr??"

next day and next day before you know it, EVERYONE knows it.
The crowd knows it. Why?

Because of the word... MONEY!

Last but not least,
I feel that Multi Level Marketing is ethical if THE PRODUCT THEY SELL is GOOD.
You see nowadays, commercialize products are like.. really COMMERCIALIZE.
Cut cost laa, cheat people by charging an expensive price and so on..
Multi Level Marketing works on REFERENT if your friend refer to you a GOOD movie would you like to watch?

So yes, Of course we will believe our referent right?
So in another sense that, they want people to BELIEVE on their product not because of WHAT THEY TELL PEOPLE through ads and so on, but rather believe because it is REAL, we are not like those top 10 commercialize products who doesn't care of your needs, we really care what you need and want to sell it to you based on your TRUST that you believe in us.

Because COMMERCIAL PRODUCTS got higher risk whether the product is good or not, because THEY WIN the consumer through ADVERTISEMENT, but MLM products LESS RISK because it is through REFERENT they can see the EFFECT of the product itself.

Hence it makes the COMPANY to really be sure not to lose their referent, makes them to ENSURE they give a GOOD SERVICE.

But sadly, as we all know in WARCRAFT we have this cheat called,
GREEDISGOOD.

Greed is good.. sigh.

Now a days, a lot of MLM company I really feel that is more on EMPHASIS on RECRUIT PEOPLE RECRUIT PEOPLE.

That is what I asked them, WHAT ARE YOU REALLY DOING?
They only could tell me, more like convincing people and COME ON DON'T YOU WANT TO EARN THIS AMOUNT OF MONEY?

is all about the MONEY!

Money makes the world go round, invest this much amount of money and be confident that more money will come.

Well, SELLING PRODUCT seems to fail, they use another method which is called.
"We are not selling product."

@@

OH MY!!! really laa..
The last lady whom talk to me, she's really nice.
Really OPTIMISTIC and so on..
All of them keep asking me, if MONEY is not a problem will you join?

I like become @@ like what the hell are you guys doing actually? Of course we as humans sure want to earn money man..
BUT WHY LA YOU CAN'T TELL ME WHAT IS THE WHOLE PURPOSE OF EVERYTHING?
What do I need to do to earn it?

I only could tell them, HEY.. where am I suppose to get those MONEY to INVEST first?

I'm not a working dude, who can have the rights to say..

I'm a RISK TAKER, HELL YEAH I'm OPTIMISTIC with this company!
No.. imagine if I borrow friend a sum of money and I can't pay back if I lost?

MOST IMPORTANTLY, they keep telling me is a SURE EARN!

SURE EARN SURE EARN SURE EARN!

DON'T DOUBT EADSY PHA-MAX is an ESTABLISH COMPANY.

really man.. then again I have this question to really post to them back.

If you say sure earn, no risk, you trust me, why not you pay for me first, when I earn I pay back you the amount of money you invest?
Hows that sound?

Of course, I kinda ask my friend who intro me into this that question,
UNLESS YOU DARE TO BORROW ME THIS SUM, I WON'T MIND.

But heh.. it seems that they are only eye-ing on me joining them.

Guess what? I've even gave my contact to the girl and wrote my contact in the paper. =/

So be ready for more CONVINCING talks..

Some said, MLM is a lie, they tell you success of others, they flash you with money because they know you are greedy.

They PROMISE you future that you ever dream of,
It is just like as if God is really talking to you.

There are really a lot of factors to consider man,
I don't want to EARN like 5k per month doing the job that is like convince people here and there.. INDEED when you get the money is like REWARDING, can go travel, get the girls around me.. buy things that I could ever dream of WAAAA what a dream deal.
But earning money this way? How? You earn because another people join and you just TAKE THEIR INVESTED MONEY.

That sounds so ethically wrong doesn't it?
Is more like You join the game, you give people money, and then more people join later you take away their money..

WHAT THE.. SERIOUSLY..

Is sure fun, seeing 5k, 25k, 30k.. WOW..
I can STOP studying already earning that amount.
All I gotta is just convince more people to join till an extend where other people will help me to convince more people.

IS LAWFULLY NOT WRONG, but I feel.. ethically wrong.

Yes, their product based also HEALTH PRODUCT, but you know.. HEALTH PRODUCT are mainly consider as luxury you know for many people.
(Except for those who work in that field and can give their family).
The lady somore confidently say in future maybe this company able to get a deal with CINEMA's so you can use the VOUCHER of the cash you invested to go.

I tell her, if is SUCH THING, I WILL GO!

With no sarcasm.

CINEMA WOR, Imagine you have 1-3k of points go and watch movie.
I tell you, I will always call many many friends to go watch with me, go watch gold class, bring those sexy girl go and watch with me I also don't mind!

So much of a sweet talk and convincing talk.
I must admit, is really PROFESSIONAL and GOOD!
The way they convince..

Is like perhaps a SKILL I never have.
Or maybe want to have.. MUAHAHAHAH

But then.. not ethical one, convince people.. I don't feel good.

So to those TOP GAINERS, and those whom already earn a lot in EASY PHA-MAX.
Will you sponser me to join this? Then in future if I already earn liao then I give you back a certain amount of profit?

I don't doubt the product, I believe the products also have some quality.

What I'm doubting is the OBJECTIVE OF THIS MEP.

WHAT YOU REALLY NEED TO DO?
IF YOU WANT ME TO JOIN, SAYING IS A SURE EARN INVESTMENT, BUT I NO MONEY, HOW?

All you could tell me is only one word.

MONEY MONEY MONEY.

Money makes money.
is called INVESTMENT.

Money makes the world go round.
is called money is a legal tender for us to use to trade goods and services.

Money is the root of all evil.
That is because evil people misuse money to make others lose their resources to trade goods and services.

Money is everything.
That comes from someone who IN NEED MONEY to solve his problem and see no other thing BUT MONEY and will do anything for MONEY.

Money minded?
Is just same as money is everything.

This is my media, you want see money?
Yea? NUFFNANG is money too xD But I don't earn much.
I've tried adsense too for some money..

But to me, life is not an ONLINE GAME, when it comes to money, I really feel like earning it in a meaningful way. After all is just something that can be used ON EARTH. Happiness and peace and meaningful life before money, but USUALLY yes you need money to make it more MEANINGFUL more HAPPY.

BUT DON'T FORGET.

CHALLENGE TOWARDS GAINING THAT MONEY is JOY TOO.

You may tell me, it takes a LONG TIME and so on.
But NOPE, I should believe in myself that I HAVE THE POTENTIAL TO MAKE MONEY to sell out something to the world that is ETHICAL and USEFUL.

Is just one thing, I don't have money to join..
If you want me to be rich just like you, would you help me?
you know..

Money makes money.. =)

to those readers, you decide for yourself whether you want to join or not.

I'm in a way, doing FREE ADVERTISEMENT for EASY PHA-MAX.

The slogan.

"Easy pha-max, I believe".

For my case, is not I don't want to believe..
Is just I don't have capital nor rights to believe.(I don't earn my own money to decide to invest on SCHEMES with so high amount of money) ><

So Easy pha-max ethical or not? Is UP TO YOU PEOPLE OUT THERE.
Trusting an organization is A RISK TOO, regardless how good it is.

My conclusion is,
This company may do good by providing good products, but have BAD scheme that FOCUSES ON RECRUITMENT to earn.
Is like Half Angel, half devil?
Is up to you TO BELIEVE or NOT TO BELIEVE.

To me, is just like NO DIFFERENCE like any MLM their MEP scheme.
So invest at your own risk since is LEGALIZE just like CASINO.

P/S: if you want to kepoh more argument of this.. go to..

http://forum.lowyat.net/topic/558415

and

http://forum.lowyat.net/topic/1254569

Ethics... Business Ethics.... Business and ethics.. and whatever ETHICS..

2010-05-12T15:19:00.010+08:00

First of all,
when this word comes to my mind is only one sentence to describe it.

As reference to the previous post, stand on your belief.
Ethics is one of the factor to look on.

I've encounter challenge on ETHICS two times in my life,
one is from this dude, another is from learning ETHICS through public speaking lectures.

Well I'll show you the first incident with my so called "trusted" online gaming friend that I used to trust.

Picture one: this is from Xue's wall, where he start to show his ultimate sarcasm with others.

Picture Two, Three and Four: I'll rearrange it nicely our argument.

Last Picture: My final offer that he didn't bother to reply, AS IF HE REALLY MEANT by I don't want to engage war with you. _|_

So the story behind this is, I was happily playing this stupid game called Friends For Sale, is a facebook game.
Usually when I play online game, my ethnic stay, even I have bad ethnics also I won't so F* up go cheat people or do some evil stuff that is ethically wrong.
Even though is JUST A GAME.

Oh wait, maybe I may think of hacking the game, or maybe have some auto program that help me pilot the game. But never go HARM the player in a way that they got scam by me or they got hack or cheated by me.

I don't go to that stage.

This guy, apparently says that I do not have ethics,
Cause I never follow the Not For Sale tag.

But SORRY, in this game of FFS, I believe that IF YOU CAN TAG NFS, please be really NFS. ELSE THERE IS NO POINT OF PLAYING THE FUCKING GAME.
The game has INTRODUCED a LOCK SYSTEM where you have to pay money to get it,
if there is a RULE of NFS then no point to have that lock.
IS CALLED FRIENDS FOR SALE, NOBODY IS NOT FOR SALE!

I only don't fight with FRIENDS that I know, FRIENDS THAT I know that I can say they are really FRIENDS or ally. Otherwise, I don't care, I just buy. Else what is the FUN of this game?
Only cowards who don't have the skills to earn enough to defend their pet to buy back will tag NFS and MIND SO MUCH if people buy them. I don't tag any of my so called "pet" NFS, if I want to own them, I will own them in real life.

This guy was really my TRUSTED online buddy, like I trust him with my rare items and I call him my RARE ITEM MANAGER.
With all my heart, I hope to see him as my good friend.
But sadly, of so much kindness I gave to him, he can go backstab me one =(

To Ngau Zhi Jian's friend, you can don't believe this, in fact I wish that you don't believe this. Every SOUL BEING has friends, regardless of how evil the person may be.
Every soul being change to, so if he is a GOOD FRIEND of yours, believe he is your good friend.

To someone that person may be an assclown, but you'll never know he is nice to others.

So as for the one who is being treated nice, THERE IS NO WAY that they will believe or agree with the bad character that the person has.

Is just as simple as if I were to say your best friend fucked a donkey, like how the hell would you believe that?

So I tell him back, Oh you said I've no ETHICS?
Excuse me, who is the one who's been attacking who first?
I AM ETHICAL ENOUGH TO OFFER YOU BACK YOUR COMPENSATION HOW ABOUT YOU?

Ethical people doesn't care about compensation, they doesn't care about ANYTHING BUT RATHER SELF BENEFIT/PROFIT

So to all APOSTATEs, especially to those whom backstab me and talk bad about me.
Don't talk about ETHICS with me,
Shungz have already been so fucking ethical, and so kind to you all throughout the times when WE WERE CELESTICA. I NEVER LEFT YOU GUYS UNTIL YOU GUYS DIDN'T WANT ME. =)

I was a LOYAL PERSON towards defending the guild, ALL THE WAY MAN.
Is only that you people don't acknowledge me but would rather wish I don't join you guys that is why I left.

Coup de tat, may not acknowledge me, but at least I know that is still better to stick with people who can't stand you. Even if they actually also didn't really like me, at least I AM CONFIDENT TO SAY that through them, I know people like those who were in F.E. But through u all Apostate-Celes, you all will go on putting that FAKE MASK in front of me again and again.

Not all of you, BUT U KNOW and I KNOW who you are.

So after stressing on ethics from FFS linking to Apostate,
how about public speaking?

What I meant by was challenge by it?
Hmm... well we get to learn like yea plagiarize is not ethical, speaking false information is not ethical.. and so on.

Then I began to think, after my lecturer post up an example.

Breaking the law vs Ethics.

Is like you drove pass the red light because it was an emergency that is a life and death matter. Is it wrong? But is it ethical?

Yea, of course everyone said it was ethical but lawfully wrong.

So sometimes is quite confusing right when it comes to ETHICS?

BUT nah, to me..
Ethics is just simple, is the opposite of WICKED.

That is why we actually need to REALLY know what is RIGHT and what is WRONG. and stand firm towards it so that we are not easily shaken.

In these world, there are so many confusing rights and wrong.

Some can be LAWFULLY right but ethically wrong..
Ethically right but lawfully wrong. HOW?

Is just simple, you have your identity, you set your standards.
Just visualize yourself as would you wanna be a criminal and after making profit you stop being a criminal and do good stuff with your profit? Or Would you want to work hard and think of solutions how to achieve your desired achievement with your STRONG FEELING of I know I WILL FIND A WAY?

Hmm..
More about this EPISODE of business ethics.. the next entry.

Tough...

2010-05-11T14:58:00.002+08:00

Dear blog, I really wish that I really could get someone who love blogging help me to update you.

Everytime when I have the time, very seldom I will have the FEEL to update you.
Because

1) I dislike spending so long writing on something which perhaps don't get me benefit.
I love to share, but it takes time.. because everytime when I type on you, I write and then backspace, then think what to write..
Takes a long time..

2) I always feel that I can create a technology whereby you just think of your thoughts out, and it's printed on you.

3) To make you become more wanted, I need to update you more.
But I feel that I can only blog when I have the spare time and most importantly OHMNESS to blog.

4) I feel that I have too many interest, so that is why I would wanna go and perform them instead of just blogging here.

THAT is why, I really wish I could someday find someone who can help me blog what I want to say. Maybe... a robot right? xD

Anyway, hi readers..
Life have been tough for me lately,
the tough story, is more on internal factor due to external factor.
So how you view it depends.

I wanted to blog here, but I think is not time yet.
Wait till the time comes, then I will.

This is an useless update.
But o well, is good to keep stalker and backstabber amused or go.. wtf O.o?

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHH NOOB!

Just a Thought to share..

2010-05-08T02:39:00.006+08:00

I've been complaining that I can't update all the time even I want to. =(

I just like to share.. that's why I love to blog.
Is part of me being human, sharing is caring <3

Alright lets not move on to sharing is caring,
I've this thought that pop-up my mind just now.

-In this world, the best belief wins.
Majority wins is just a subset of it.

-Belief define us who we are.
Our believe may not turn out to be true, but like I say.. it just make us who we are.

-The strength of your belief will push your actions.
If you believe so much in something, you'll really go into it, perhaps defending it, or stick to it so hard.

So..
What is the BEST BELIEF?
I know, in this world, so many things to believe in.
Like to believe whether there is a God or not, to believe that is there such thing as easy money making legal and honorable jobs or not, free lunch? etc etc.

To me the best belief is that,
-you can strongly justify your believe with appropriate justification.
-Ethical.
-Affect others in a positive manner.

I think basically that's all.

Why didn't I wrote LOGIC there?

Cause you see, to everyone who has many belief..
LOGIC is also viewed differently by them, the possibilities and impossibilities to them is measured differently.
Like, you ask someone who don't know how to calculate negative figures, they'll think that having a negative numbers is IMPOSSIBLE.

Belief DOES NOT HAVE TO COME OUT WITH IMMEDIATE RESULTS!
(You know, Seeing is believing)
But nowadays, everyone always believe on something that they can get an immediate results, and the best part is.. they just can't FURTHER justify their believe.

Belief helps you to stay away from CONFUSION.
I've seen people around me always say they are vex or really "fan" or fed up because they just don't know WHAT TO DO, and UNSURE of what they want.
You know why? Because they just DO NOT have a believe.
Yet they so called wanna PLAY SAFE, don't hold any believe.
As if laa let others push you, end up, push around and around.. and around..
end up taking a long time to be where you really want to be.

KA-NA-SAI!

Why are people SO AFRAID to hold a belief?
There is no such thing as being neutral and then everything go smooth.. cause is like meaningless to live.

WAIT! That is a belief.

LOL!

But seriously...
Isn't believing in something a NICE THING to do in life?

I mean what is there to be afraid of?
If it is ethical, and you have strong and appropriate justification to defend it if someone shakes it, and perhaps with that belief you can help others?

Yes I know, we are AFRAID of uncertainties.
But SO WHAT?
If you don't have your belief, then, you'll be pushed around by the CURRENT uncertainties.

You want to be uncertain all the time?
Think again?

Is rather to like stick to a believe, and okay, if is wrong, end up is not in those 3 criteria that I've just mentioned, then change that belief.
But otherwise.. stick to it.

You may give up.. and so on.
But having a belief, will give you some kind of feeling like..

Imagine you believe in angel, and of course people laugh at you.. and so on..
But if turn out that there is SUCH thing as an angel, you will feel this kind of feeling that.. ahhh.. I was once believing in angel, I thought it don't exist, at least I now know it exist, rather than I don't even dare to stupidly try believing.

So PEOPLE WHOM backstab me.
You know why although I know you've backstab me I still be friend with you?
Because I'm a person who believe that every soul has his humanity in him, and we all make mistake and I'm kind enough to give you a chance.

BUT! If you still want to go on, I MAY NOT KNOW that you are backstabbing me.
But my belief is that somehow there will be one point of time, where you will see me just RETALIATE. Is the law of nature.
I'm a human with feelings.

Just like an object having a limit to receive limited forces before it just burst out.
You may laugh all you want, but I know the more cruel act you do, the more I will eventually retaliate in an unpredictable way.
Well as I didn't act like how a NORMAL human will act, fighting fire with fire when the moment I know that you've backstab me. That has already SHOWN an UNPREDICTABLE action already.. have you ever thought of the way unpredictable?

I'm sure you don't. =)

Even if I NEVER get to get my revenge on you,
eventually you'll just lose out my kindness to you.

I love being kind to people, it gives me the feeling of having a meaningful life.
But why you people just want to stop my nature of being me?

You want the cruelty from me?
Cause any person on earth could be a sadist you know.
Usually, sadist are the one who is being bullied the most, like you know the one who is weak.. and the least expected one, most importantly, do things like really you people cannot predict.
Yea.. they are sadist because you people have shown how sadistic you could be, so they in return responded on what you all have asked for.

That's all for my sadistic thought for now.
Is 4am =)

The thought of holding strong on a belief is mainly for those who are always UNSURE OF WHAT THEY WANNA DO.
The sadistic part..
Just a link to it..

yea maybe one day I should blog about people I know that bitch about me.

Since they talk bad about me behind my back, so I SHOULD talk about them publicly.
光明镇大 let everybody know those sohai!
Then I'm VERY SURE you'll people will be fuck-ed up and act like as if you don't care. But I know YOU DO.

As we all knows, to do bad things is more easier than to do good.
Hence, to make people angry, is MORE EASIER to make people happy. ^^

On top of that, the POWER to GOSSIP.. EVERYONE HAS IT.
You scratch my back, I'll scratch yours.
You destroy my image, I'll destroy yours.

Peace out, gossipers, stalkers, friends, family, whoever who reads this blog.

Can't Update all the time =(

2010-05-06T04:38:00.003+08:00

Seriously.. I really wish I can do the skill call Kage Bunshin no jutsu.

Multiple Shadow Clone if is translated.

I want to do a lot of things at one time,
I want to play games, at the same time blog, at the same time photoshop, at the same time.. blablalbalbalblal...

Too bad there is no such thing.

Yea. That Naruto skill I always thought is the most UNCOOL skill ever.
But I was wrong, in fact it is the MOST USEFUL skill ever, where you can do many things at one go.

Which is already a God ability... Omnipresence.
Yes, if I were to be Omnipresence, I can be like one Shungz in school and one at home sleeping. How cool is that?
Well I don't mind if the one who is in school isn't learning much, sometimes when your just dead tired and need a rest but yet you need to go to class.. is just no choice =(

Hah, I'm blogging this where my brain is tired.

But seriously.. This shadow clone thingy really give you the ability of being Omnipresence.
I think having 2 clone of me will be enough.

Even not having other godly ability,
I feel that this ability is enough to make you to become semi-godly.
Because you can multiple your output.

Imagine like one study chapter 1, another chapter 2, and another chapter 3..
Everything you do is x3 the rate.
People take 3 hours to complete, you take 1 hour?

As you keep on multiple it.. lets say.. 30 hours.. you only take 10 hours??
NOT EVEN HALF A DAY?!?!?

Anyway. yea I'm having my holidays.
Playing stupid IntenseRO.
Yes very TENSE playing that server.

Never play such RO before.

But either way, I'm on my way of figuring out things one by one.
Maybe I'll talk about my journey a lil.. like those can be exposed I exposed.
Those cannot be exposed I shall not exposed.
Else I kill of my plan of achieving it, as it is a SERVER where the GM or the players can CHANGE things like the settings and so on.

Overall, I think... I roughly know a few tricks here and there and perhaps.. SAW SOMETHING that I can work on.

I have made my mind that this time when I play RO, play it smart.
To establish myself in this server efficiently with an effective output.

That is always been my mini dream when I play MMORPG game but sadly I always NEVER make it till that stage.

Oh wait, I think the Facebook game Friends For Sale, I've already made it till like NO ONE TO COMPETE liao.
Till my partner also don't want to be active, till people that I want to make them rich also they don't want to play. =D
Well cause I know the theory of Limit and Exploit, it doesn't exist =P

Perhaps this is a more proper one which might sound similar.
Limit = constraint, the word exploit is in there xD

The most I been to is, quite establish, but not reached the stage that I want to reach. Because I always cannot find out what is the pro way or some pro idea, strategy or whatever you call it... to get it there. =(
Fated la I'm suppose.

But o well, lets see what I could do this time.

Towards efficiency and effectiveness!

Intense RO.. Leveling = BORING!

2010-05-03T02:04:00.005+08:00

Seriously, it's been two days since I just join this private server with at least a group of people. The server is called IntenseRO. FREAKING PISS I TELL YOU.

To up lvl it takes so long time cause the rate isn't high for lvling.
But okay.. I AM POSITIVE that there is an EFFECTIVE way to up lvl, but I can't seem to find the most EFFECTIVE way yet, and perhaps the equipment for fast lvling.

I HATE PLAYING PRIVATE SERVER that you need to lvl, lvling isn't worth the time where you can spend those time pvp-ing or perhaps go for some Boss hunting session.

Furthermore START FROM SCRATCH??
Deng!
Frustrating like no tomorrow.

Seriously man I don't find how people take it as FUN to lvl in such rate.
To me playing MMORPG game the fun part is Player Vs Player system.
Anything involve PVP, only I like.
Other than that.. ISH... screw it.

That is why I NEVER LIKE MAPLE STORY, they have boss hunting, but not PVP(I'm not sure do they still have it now but I'm sure is been really long time they didn't have).

Haizz.. I really hope that I'll find a way to lvl in a PRACTICAL RATE soon.
Really don't want to spend more than 2 hours just lvl and not get to the next stage of job change.

It is also been almost ONE YEAR since I've played RO.
Yea, I really miss this game a lot.

The only motivation that keeps me to go on is just prepare myself for the WOE(Guild Vs Guild) thingy and PVP in the future.
Maybe some boss hunting session.

So I won't say much other than, STUPID LVLING SERVER.
But to show you my noobness in that server.

This will be how I start of as,
cannot stop complaining how shit is the lvling rate is.
YES, piss off.. frus.. dulan.. whatever.

Who chose this server to commit in,
I really hope we do join the right server.

With such lvling rate.. I really @#$%^&*()_ already.
I hope is worth the #$%^&*() for the start.

So if any INTENSERO player(non guildmate) who read this, yes you can call me noob for now, because I'm damn FRUSTRATED with the lvling system.
If you are a GM, screw u.. why do you make such LOW RATE of lvling?

Lvling in RO is STUPID, there is NO JOY in lvling in RO - Shungz.

But I will play on, unless all of them quit before we are ESTABLISH.
For the sake of joining them as a group.. this is the "suffering" that I have to go through..
Lvling meaninglessly, hunting items from scratch.

Form HTML test

2010-04-27T22:29:00.056+08:00

failed buttons:

<form name="pikanoob" id="pikanoob" enctype="text/plain" method="post" action="mailto:pikachun@hotmail.com">
<table border="1">
<tr>
<td>
Name: <input type="text" maxlength="50" size="40"/></br></br>

<fieldset>
<legend style="color:blue;font-size:15">Do you like pikachu?</legend>
<input type="radio" name="like" id="yes" value="Y"/>Yes</br>
<input type="radio" name="like" id=no" value="N"/>No</br>
</fieldset>

<fieldset><legend style="color:blue;font-size:15">Why you dislike pikachu?</legend>
<input type="checkbox" name="sux"/>Because it sux</br>
<input type="checkbox" name="yellow"/>Because it is yellow, I hate yellow</br>
<input type="checkbox" name="pokehate"/>I hate Pokemon.</br>
<input type="checkbox" name="lovepika"/>Who say! I love Pikachu!! PIKA!</br></fieldset>

<fieldset><legend style="color:blue;font-size:15">If you were given a choice to kick pikachu's ass how you want to kick it?</legend>
<select name="kickass" id="kickass">
<optgroup label="Hardware tools">
<option>Hammer</option>
<option>ScrewDriver</option>
<option>Pliers</option>
</optgroup>
<optgroup label="Soft stuff">
<option>Pilow</option>
<option>Underpants</option>
<option>Cotton Candy</option>
</optgroup>
</select><br/><br/>
Show us how you kick PikaChu's ass
Upload your photo: <br />
<input type="file" name="photo" id="photo" />

</fieldset>

<fieldset><legend style="color:blue;font-size:15">Pikachu is..</legend>
<select name="pikais" id="pikais" size="4">
<optgroup label="Very">
<option>cute</option>
<option>ugly</option>
</optgroup>
<optgroup label="Not So">
<option>cute</option>
<option>ugly</option>
</optgroup>
</select></fieldset>

<fieldset>
<legend style="font-size:14;color:blue">If I am Pikachu I will..</legend>
<textarea rows="10" cols="60">Write what you will do if you were Pikachu</textarea>
</fieldset>

<input type="button" value="Submit"/>
<input type="reset" value="Reset"/>
<tr>
<td>
</table>
</form>

Privacy in Social Network Sites(SNS).

2010-04-27T19:47:00.005+08:00

What is PRIVACY?
-the quality of being secluded from the presence or view of others
-The state of being private; the state of not being seen by others

So is more like how many EYES on you, or perhaps how much can people see you.

Social Network sites especially Facebook, is like everyone has it already.
The main concern and the hot topic for such social network websites are always PRIVACY.
PRIVACY PRIVACY PRIVACY!!....

Actually, I feel that for a guy who has nothing much to let people see..
Which is like a guy like me, yea what you want to see from me?
So yes, privacy doesn't really matter for me.

I mean I don't mind 99999 people view my photos, see what I posted on my wall, perhaps only we don't want our parents to so called check out what we type like WTF and so on hahaha.

Of course, I know they are certain things we do, we just don't want people to see like......... those no need for me to mention also you'll know.
But HONESTLY SPEAKING, I think guys.. Is nothing really matter.
Unless that particular guy is WANTED by people like criminal, celebrity and so on.

Privacy will then lead to so called SAFETY, is like the MORE people know about your information, the more POSSIBLE harms they could do to you.
Like for example, track where you are, know your credit card number, use your I/C no. to scam people etc etc.

But... ACTUALLY.. I think many people who so called TURN ON their privacy mode so HIGH is not because of that.
Is mainly because they just don't like the feeling of STRANGERS adding them, chatting with them, and view their profile.

For girls.. I know.
Those SIBEH LENG LUI, DEFINITELY, sure receive lots of add request everyday.
Sadly to say, the longer you stay in the social networking website, the more perverts you may meet. XD

But for guys.. I don't think I ever come across the so called "pervert" female who talks to you that they want sex from you and so on.
Or they stalk you and then they so called.. "rape" you? LOL?

So I think.. for a guy.
If you talk about PRIVACY on social online website.
Is really FUNNY...
Like what valuable information of yours they need?

Imagine if I were just a garbage collector, and I go on facebook, only updating about myself how I feel everyday as a garbage collector..
Like who the heck gives a damn? What information of mine they would be interested?

So I really find this PRIVACY really POINTLESS for some people.
The whole purpose for Social network sites are stated in the noun itself.

Social and Network.. a place for you to get to know people.

The joy of being human is to get to be CONNECTED with other human beings.
That's why Nokia's idea connecting people sells.
So that's why if you MIND SO MUCH about privacy.. and just wanna stick around with your FRIENDS ONLY.. then.. how are GOOD STRANGERS on EARTH are going to get to know you?

I know some people are a CELEBRITY that many people knows them and they know many people, hence not only people they know add them, their fans whom people don't know ALSO they add them. That one I understand, they are IN NEED OF PRIVACY ALL THE TIME.

But for an ORDINARY guy, eat, sleep, play, live on...
What is PRIVACY? We don't need so much privacy, but instead...
WE NEED PUBLICITY. LOL.

So to conclude my whole jumble thoughts here.
Privacy is focusing more on COMFORT rather than SAFETY.
Example? Well when you take bath, or any moment you need to be naked.. you get inside a room or space and locked the door right? Why? Because we MIND and we feel UNCOMFORTABLE to be viewed naked.

Those who have gazillions of attention, and felt that their attention is like the cheat code "poweroverwhelming". Then to that person.. PRIVACY matters, it doesn't matter whether is a he/she or he-she.

Those who just live life like how other ordinary humans live.
To them, publicity matters cause they need publicity to survive.
You know.. self promotion.. to be acknowledge.. and so on.. so that..
you know.. you know people, you got business =D.

To me, privacy in the Social Network Sites.
Means not really a big deal man..
What you want to see in my profile.. what picture you want to see in my facebook...
You see laa..
Who add me also, as long as they got a SOCIAL PURPOSE to add me.

APPROVE LOR!

Sure there is risk, but I think.. the risk will still be more or like the same even if your not in social networking sites. (applicable for certain people only)

In fact I feel that it is MUCH MORE WORSE to be NOT CONNECTED with people at all in SOCIAL NETWORKING SITES(cause information spread faster in SNS).

Table Test

2010-04-23T18:55:00.038+08:00

Top Left	Top Right
Btm Left	Btm Right

<table border="1">
<tr>
<td>Top Left</td>
<td>Top Right</td>
</tr>

<tr>
<td>Btm Left</td>
<td>Btm Right</td>
</tr>
</table>

Simple Table

I eat 3 column
1 column	2 column	3 column

<table border="1">

<tr>
<td colspan="3">I eat 3 column</td>
</tr>

<tr>
<td>1 column</td>
<td>2 column</td>
<td>3 column</td>
</tr>

</table>

Column Span table

I eat 3 rows	row1 column 2	row1 column 3
	row2 column 2	row2 column 3
	row3 column 2	row3 column 3

<table border="1">
<tr>
<td rowspan="3">I eat 3 rows</td>
<td>row1 column 2</td>
<td>row1 column 3</td>

</tr>

<tr>
<td>row2 column 2</td>
<td>row2 column 3</td>
</tr>

<tr>
<td>row3 column 2</td>
<td>row3 column 3</td>
</tr>

</table>
Row Span Table

I eat 4 row	I eat 3 column			I eat 4 row
	I eat two rows	I eat two rows	I eat two rows

	I eat 3 column

<table border="1" height="100%" witdh="100%">
<tr>
<td rowspan="4">I eat 4 row</td>
<td colspan="3">I eat 3 column</td>
<td rowspan="4">I eat 4 row</td>
</tr>

<tr>
<td rowspan="2">I eat two rows</td>
<td rowspan="2">I eat two rows</td>
<td rowspan="2">I eat two rows</td>
</tr>

<tr>
</tr>

<tr>
<td colspan="3">I eat 3 column</td>
</tr>

</table>
The ultimate table.

I eat 3 row	I eat 3 column			I eat 3 row
	I eat no column	I eat no column	I eat no column
	I eat 3 column

<table border="1" height="100%" witdh="100%">
<tr>
<td rowspan="3">I eat 3 row</td>
<td colspan="3">I eat 3 column</td>
<td rowspan="3">I eat 3 row</td>
</tr>

<tr>
<td >I eat no column</td>
<td >I eat no column</td>
<td >I eat no column</td>
</tr>

<tr>
<td colspan="3">I eat 3 column</td>
</tr>

</table>
The Ultimate table with different row span. But SAME SHAPE.

I eat 4 row	I eat 3 column			I eat 4 row
	I eat two rows	I eat two rows	I eat two rows

	I eat 3 column

<table border="1" height="100%" witdh="100%">

<colgroup>
<col span="1" style="background-color:blue">
<col span="2" style="background-color:red">
</colgroup>

<tr>
<td rowspan="4">I eat 4 row</td>
<td colspan="3">I eat 3 column</td>
<td rowspan="4">I eat 4 row</td>
</tr>

<tr>
<td rowspan="2">I eat two rows</td>
<td rowspan="2">I eat two rows</td>
<td rowspan="2">I eat two rows</td>
</tr>

<tr>
</tr>

<tr>
<td colspan="3">I eat 3 column</td>
</tr>

</table>
colgroup span+ col span tag.

I eat 4 row	I eat 3 column			I eat 4 row
	I eat two rows	I eat two rows	I eat two rows

	I eat 3 column

<table border="1" height="100%" witdh="100%">

<colgroup span="1" style="background-color:blue">
<colgroup span="2" style="background-color:red">
</colgroup>

<tr>
<td rowspan="4">I eat 4 row</td>
<td colspan="3">I eat 3 column</td>
<td rowspan="4">I eat 4 row</td>
</tr>

<tr>
<td rowspan="2">I eat two rows</td>
<td rowspan="2">I eat two rows</td>
<td rowspan="2">I eat two rows</td>
</tr>

<tr>
</tr>

<tr>
<td colspan="3">I eat 3 column</td>
</tr>

</table>

Colgroup for all column span..
By right it suppose to PRODUCE the same results.. just that dunno why blogspot sot jor. I've tried it on html it work.

Screw table.html

So near yet so far.

2010-04-23T17:02:00.010+08:00

Today, I'm suppose to scout for This address
No 9, TP7, UEP Industrial Park, 40400 Shah Alam.

Sadly with no knowledge about this place, I went myself try to search for it after GOOGLE MAP.

Actually I've tried venturing myself to Shah Alam yesterday, but I went SO FAR all the way to i-City there then I realize that there is no point trying my luck to search again, so I'll try the 2nd day which is today.

So I roughly know is that after the toll, take the first left turn, as long as your near the Batu Tiga KTM station, you should be in your way to that Jln TP7.

I've reached the area.. after 30 mins of search in

They have a NEW Subang or USJ heights building up soon, which google map HAVEN'T update yet.

and I've also get lost myself in the area TP 7/2, 3, 5, and 6.

Furthermore I've even lead to the stupid Jln Ijuk, an area near there.

Like really $%^&*()

Later on I decided to head to the police station to ask for direction, and yea he was really friendly too. So he told me the area there, yes I went there.. in fact I couldn't find to. Sigh.

But I decided to head back home again, since I've been informed that I no need to get to there myself.
But still.. I think I must personally explore there myself someday!

So lets trace back from the start.

Take a look at the OVERALL MAP in google map

From far, it looks like this

If you zoom in, you'll see a name of a LANDMARK, yes.. a school!

If you zoom again, then you see the real proper road, initially it looks like tp7/3 has many ways to get inside, but the fact is, it has only about 1 or 2 ways to get in

So first rule when you google map.
ALWAYS ZOOM IN VERY DEEP to see for noticeable landmarks

Well I lazy to elaborate the next few rule when you google map something, but well the remaining are what I so called learned when I want to EXPLORE the area that I don't know.

1st, google map tells you how to get there, but never really tells you how many traffic light, perhaps how many TOLLS you need to pay/pass by,look out for which signboards and so on.

2nd, INDEED Malaysian Signboard still FAIL!
They only show the so called "main way" to the destination, but never show the alternative way, sometimes the alternative way to your destination is nearer and more EASIER to go.

3rd, Take notice of landmark because this will be the key point to know where you are. So if you want to give direction is easier.

4th, Get to know some major areas, so that you know where your heading, like for example, if you are in PJ and you are heading to KLANG, therefor if your next destination before Klang is Subang Jaya, Shah Alam means your in the Federal Highway.
(In another words, you get lost also you can go back home)

5th, Always stay alert and take notice of the road, if the more you go straight the more you feel the terrain change, landmarks change, that means your are heading to another area. So next step is,
Either go on or Uturn back. But make sure you remember your reference point in case you get lost, you get back to that place and from there you know where to go.

6th, Remember and know when to turn. Because everyone knows how to go straight, but is the TURN that determines the changes of your route.
Hence if you want to give people direction and get less confuse to find your location, KEEP in mind to emphasize on the turning, that is where most of us will get lost.

7th, If you get lost, just ask many people around the street, the more you paiseh the more you can't find your way. Keep asking, there will be SOMEONE who will actually give you a GOOD EXPLANATION in directions.
But I guess, maybe for girls.. due to safety issues, you might not want to get down from the car very often at NIGHT =O
Well, I've learned this when I want to get to the little Genting in Ampang Lookout point. Apparently there is TWO lookout point, but OF COURSE WE WANT TO GO TO THE TOURIST AREA. We asked many people, but we kept on lead to either the old and the new one, so end up we are trap in the middle. At last, when we go to the Mini Mini Ampang Lookout point, which is a housing area...
There is this kind Abang whom actually DREW the map for me.

With traffic lights, and famous landmarks and so on.
Yup, we made it after an HOUR of searching that stupid place.

8th, familiarize yourself with the area, because once you are familiar real fast, you roughly could draw the map of the area, meaning you've already KNOW the place.

So the key point of getting to know directions is,
landmarks, reference point, along which highway, and turning point.

Don't BLINDLY lookout or depend on Signboard unless the one who give you the directions ask you to do so as a guide.
Meaning if someone give you direction saying follow the signboard heading to where and where only you follow, but if you are first time there you will have to just trial and error.

Just like one of Universiti Malaya's signboard, it says turn left, but the fact is turn left after another turning. WHAT THE..
Because signboard could mean.. TURN LEFT after this signboard, or TURN LEFT straight away, or maybe go UNDERNEATH or keep left.. it is not interactive.

Furthermore sometimes the signboard's LOCATION is hard to detect, or perhaps VANDALIZED.

Depend on signboard, at the same time, be alert to see whether you are in the right track or not.

That's my so called, adventure to explore places I don't know.
I have more.. but I guess my story of exploration will have to continue some other time.

Lionel Messi, What is impossible? The message from Adidas.

2010-04-17T23:01:00.014+08:00

Today, I just find out about my "situation of being stuck" again.
Yes.. time after time, although I did some progression in some ways, BUT there's always one point of my life where I feel that.. why I am ALWAYS lacking on something?

So lets focus on football/futsal now.
Well I've started off playing football when I was age 14-15, started off playing with my group of friends whom we called ourself E-X.
When I started playing, I thought that I just play till the stage where I can just play with a STANDARD performance is fine with me,
BUT! As time goes by, I've started to love this sports and want to be good at it.

So we DID play big field of football/soccer and have match with a group of some team in our school name Titans, but we lose most of the time, cause they have more technical skill compare to us.(We only win them in Futsal later on). But overall, we E-X play more on FUTSAL because waking up at Saturday morning became a burden for us.

Well, I remember my progression was from can't kick the ball till can kick the ball, till can run with the ball, and dribble with the ball a little.

As my progression goes on and on, meaning as I play more futsal, I felt that I'm ALWAYS lacking on this and that which really dissatisfying.

-First, I can't blast the ball..
I try harder and harder and harder and harder.. but yet I always fail to blast the ball..
So my assumption is since my size is small, and I'm so skinny so my power isn't there.
*But later on when I googled and youtube the net, how to shoot a ball in soccer, I finally knew that my method was wrong. So now I know the techniques, and yes indeed I finally master the techniques how to shoot properly.

-As for Current I guess the thing I still don't know is how to dribble the ball.
I last time thought that dribble the ball is just using ur tip of ur feet to tap the ball and you quickly move your body then you should be able to control it.

But as time goes by, I felt that I just don't have the skill to dribble or control the ball properly.
Which is shown in today's competition.

Well is a inter-church league but of course you can bring in your friends to join into the team.

So today is the day where I finally get to REALIZE that again another thing that is stuck with me for so long, can't dribble the ball..

Dribbling give you an advantage whereby it makes you more intimidating when you hold the ball, and I always thought that HEY! I'm so small, I'm easily pushed away, how could I ever had a chance to dribble?

Well I know I have two strength which is non visible to people who seen me for once.
Speed and Tolerance/Stamina. But so what if I have such advantage but my fitness ain't there and also I can't dribble the ball?

Yes again, I blame on my fitness.. but today my opposing team, they have this striker who is JUST LIKE my size, but yet he can dribble so good and KNOWS how to play it. Even the big guy in my team also find some trouble in marking him.

So then I only learn even more to stop blaming on my disadvantage,
again I googled about how to dribble in soccer/football.
Guess what? I stomp into an article about.. Do you want to dribble like Lionel Messi?

Yes. this guy his height is just like me, and of course fitness way better than me.
I've known about his skill earlier on and do take him as a role model that maybe I should learn from him,but nothing actually strikes my mind to work towards a better dribbling skills until I've seen an INSPIRING advertisement about him by Adidas.

He said he was SMALL..
Well to know whether you are small or not is simple, as long as you've been bullied by bigger bullies means your small.

That is my version of explaining it.

He mentioned about how he uncool it was to be small, and IT IS A SICKNESS that requires him to go for treatment.
Yes Barcelona was kind enough to save his life due to his talent,
what really inspire me is that his condition was a sickness and mine is like not having the knowledge and blame on what I don't have, but he just goes on and on playing football till the treatment is done... here you go..

Compilation of his skills

The dribble that is similar to Maradona

So there you go, and if you did catch up with the latest champions league where Barcelona Vs Arsenal.. he is the Magician!

I've always look myself as I want to be like that,
because I felt that I was meant to do that, since I'm not a big guy that act as an tank, nor any muscular guy who is like the show stopper to stop those who are attacking..
I love dribbling, and I know controlling the ball is important. After reading the article, I've learned that EVERYONE needs to have dribbling skills even if a goal keeper. I know what it meant, it didn't meant that you need SUPERB skills on that, just adequate skills will do.
Not always you can just say "O just pass to your teammate the ball then can already".
The fact is there are sometimes where you JUST can't pass the ball.

They say our height will have lower center of gravity, so that suppose to be our advantage against bigger guys. Yes.. just like how Lionel Messi did it, I should take him as an example towards improving my dribbling skill.

I will have to start off with getting myself a futsal ball, and start dribbling at home. WAIT! When I get over to another place, I hope I will have the space to practice how to dribble too, even if there is no space.. I will make sure I'll get myself a space.

So Lionel Messi taught me to stop blaming on my size, cause he has my height, he even have WAY WORST SITUATION than mine.. but he didn't gave up on football and yet he had shown the world that his effort has accomplish something.
I'm sure a positive spirit during his times of treatment too is there..

So yea. Impossible is nothing that's Adidas slogan.
If you look properly in a positive way, Impossible the word itself if you split it is
Im possible.

Well I know that in this world, there a IMPOSSIBILITIES..
Impossibilities exist because limit, rules, law exist.

what's the motive of this Adidas is trying to promote is.. POSITIVE THINKING TOWARDS IMPROVEMENT/ACHIEVEMENT.

Don't just look at your weakness, and then just give up on there.
Work on it, train hard to make it your strength.
Have a positive thinking.. because a positive thinking will lead to a movement rather than just stagnant when you think is possible.

So in another words, as we all know that humans are not perfect and nothing in this world except for God is perfect, EVEN THOUGH you don't get 100% which is so called really impossible to get 100%, but you still can get 90% or 99.9% which is still consider 100% in a human perception.

Look on what you can improvised on, Look on the good side on you, rather than just thinking is impossible already then just stop there and don't care.

I've always tell myself, your chapter of story goes on and on as long as you are still alive.

Ichimaru Gin, Arrogant People

2010-04-15T09:34:00.007+08:00

WARNING THIS POST IS GONNA BE OFFENSIVE.

This Ichimaru Gin over here is some Character from Bleach, yes Ex-3rd squad captain and also now the villain Aizen's subordinate.

He has that smile that some of you may find it cute, but to me..
THAT SMILE IS SUCH A MOCKING WAY OF SMILE.
I HATE IT.

I dislike people who mock others, as if they are so perfect.
They mock nevermind, but yet they did not mock in a positive manner,
in fact more like looking down on someone and stuff like that and of course plus the package of looking himself as a SUPERIOR being.

Well, people do MOCK me with that sohai face also. So what I did was either _|_ or just mock me all you can, cause someday when u can't mock me anymore, I'll be haunting you without doing anything ^^V

I know SOMEONE who is JUST like this character Ichimaru Gin, I mean that particular person I know have this SMILE just like him as in his face will become JUST EXACTLY like that yong sui, ALSO THAT MOCKING PEOPLE ATTITUDE.
Well I know Ichimaru Gin has this smile even though he smile it in a positive manner, but I KNOW that the artist/author that creates this character with such smile is DEFINITELY a MOCKING SMILE. Trying to say.. you suck.

This person I know, he has his good point, but I DAMN HATE IT when he always smile like that with the intention of saying that person suck. I really wish that someday he'll LEARN how to be less arrogant.

I hate LANC people, so sometimes I just love to see how lanC people lanC those lanC people.. they lanC among themselves telling the whole world how lanC they are and then.. we outside people just watch and laugh them in a more hilarious manner.

To those lanC snobbish think you are superior that you must look down on people,
I really hope that one day you'll learn how to be humble.
You may have a group of people to support you with your lanCness, but I tell you..
when the day you lost your thing of yourself that can give you the rights to lanC, you'll be nothing to them.
Furthermore, for those who just lanC and think they very smart but they actually have no SKILLS in it.. you can lanC all you want, but I tell you..

"You lanC me, I can lanC you too."

To lanC is so easy because the theory of human being is everybody is not perfect.
To catch your flaws is way more easier than to look at your good point.

At times like this, prayer is needed.

2010-04-12T21:06:00.002+08:00

One of the FUN thing to stay OUTSIDE from your house is HOUSEMATES.

Is just SO DAMN SAD that my future course will be at Setapak, and YET I can't find anyone who can CONFIRM that we'll be staying together.
Well I know there are same batch of coursemates around me that are STILL looking for
housemate/roommates, I can't find one.

Most of them is either they got a GROUP to stay with, which is pretty cool,
or either stay near there, or lastly...
SINCE IS STILL IN KL SO THEY HAVE THE MENTALITY TO TRAVEL THERE.

I feel a little disappointed when they say they want to TRAVEL there, and the reason they gave me is that they just LOVE HOME, or their parents want them to be at home..
BUT NOT FINANCIAL MATTER.

In my opinion, I feel that reasons is really kinda not valid.

I just don't understand, is your TRAVELING TIME WORTH?
Imagine traveling 1 hour everyday, if is through and flow is 2 hours then.
2/24 hours is meant for traveling, and which is 1/12 of your life you are just WASTING on traveling. Is that WORTH?

Traveling you'll be freaking tired too, and you gotta do it for 4 years?

Even I have a fancy car, loads of money, I WON'T want to travel because with that 2 hours, I can have my EXTRA SLEEP, or perhaps make use of it. Furthermore, Malaysian traffic, TILL TODAY LIKE CAN NEVER HAVE NO JAMS! Do you like traffic jams?
Not to forget, if you travel, it affects your day, because you will have less sleep perhaps, and you'll feel tired traveling man, 2 HOURS of traveling is NOT FUN!
My house I only use it to EAT, SLEEP, and PLAY COMP.
Other than that, nothing special I could do here, besides I could CHILL OUT wiht my Subang Jaya mate which they all FLY TO OVERSEAS already, you know la Subang Jaya people... can say 7/10 or 8/10 will fly to overseas one, rich people area and I'm the one who is the NOT RICH one =(

Yes, I know some of you are really tough, can tell me how you people travel everyday currently, that is for a YEAR maybe I DON'T MIND, but not for 4 years!

My TD group of mates, most of them got their place to stay,
and those stay in KLANG VALLEY, either they are staying near there or having an extra semester in Foundation, or NOT SURE.

Well alrite, can't say much, =/
But yes there are who gave me that reasons which I feel like... @#$%^&
But what to do.. not everyone think a like, so I must LEARN to be cool with it.

Sad case man...
Housemate tak da,
Roommate tak da,
Wanna stay at PV10 also chances lower d.

I have other offers which are not PV10,
But I wanna stay there, either 12 or 10..
Cause yes I want to sometimes chill at the mamak to makan, and so on.

So right now, all I got to pray for is this SIMPLE thing,
I really need a cool,trustable and friendly house and roommate and MY IDEAL PLACE TO STAY. Lastly, I hope I can convince my mom to bring a car there. Then we'll see what comes along..

I will always SUPPORT STAYING there, please man LEARN TO BE INDEPENDENT.
Furthermore, Malaysian TRAFFIC SUX BIG TIME, what's more the PUBLIC TRANSPORT SUCK EVEN EVEN MORE.. SO what is LRT? You'll be PACK during peak hours, worth it?
Do you like to hear every day "NEXT STATION..." "Next station..."
What you have in KLANG VALLEY that you can't give up on? You still can TRAVEL back to your place when you want to meet up with your friends since is only 1 hour!

My word will be..
"If you do not have FINANCIAL PROBLEM, what's holding you back from staying there?"

Me = Anti-Traveling for one hour DAILY.

Think of your efficiency, achieve effectively.
(The less you travel, the more time you have in hand to do what you want)
ONLY if you LOVE traveling, then go ahead.

(If you kepoh, you read on)

For those who are in KAMPAR, don't complain so much already.
KAMPAR is NOT ULU as you think it is...
Because of STUDENTS in UTAR and also KTAR there.
You people are the one that gonna make that place happening.

Not to forget, is just 2 hours+ drive back to KL here.
Check out pretty girls, Check out handsome guys and you'll agree with me KAMPAR is heaven. Peace ^^V.

My Setapak course, my friend who is my senior already told me..
No girls one you know, you have to be prepared.
This is my last week seeing those girls around me SOON all most likely disappear to Kampar liao, where all the leng zai and leng lui there...

Yea I know.. I may know some other pretty girls there, BUT preferably if your course have lotsa girl.. you would be more MOTIVATED to go to class. Furthermore, the quantity of girls will determine the action of the group of guys.
If in a group is all guys, you'll always hear like monotone and deep voice.. and MAXIMIZING SOHAINESS which you will not hear how does cute girls voices go..
"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"
NOTHING sweet like the birds in the sky, or nothing really happening and is ENGINEERING so most guys in their are SURE TO BE more SERIOUS.

This(Guy+Girl Group>All Guys group) I can assure you, by observing a group of guys with a group of guys with sufficient amount of girls comparing with ONLY guys group.

With girls around, is always HEHEHAHA all the time.
Without girls around is like...
"Yo man, wassup.. where we gonna chill yo. Sien la." Then by the END OF THE DAY,
these group of guys will SURE SPLIT to go and join with another group that have GIRLS other time of their life,
cause they take it as all guys group are so called "Guys outing".

Conclusion, centuries after centuries.. female always play a role in ATTRACTION.
Never fails until today.
=(

If I were him...

2010-04-11T00:42:00.011+08:00

If I were him, it would be wonderful

If I were him, I'm sure to win your heart.
If I were him, I'm sure to make you laugh every single day.
If I were him, I'm sure to have brought you somewhere else already,
to the place you wanna be.
If I were him, I'm sure that I would have already spent at least 4 figure of RM cash on you by the end of this year.
If I were him, I would have already shown you the wonders of my life, the friends I hang out with, the places I go to...dot dot dot dot.........
If I were him, I'm sure that I be a part of helping you to solve your problem.
If I were him, taking you out for a movie will become NOTHING at all, which means,
I'm sure to have already brought you out many many many times...
If I were him, I'm sure that I will be that guy you want to spend time with all the time.

If only.. I were him.

If I were him, errrmm.. I don't think it will be better

If I were him, what is the difference between me and him?
If I were him, then I would be a clone of him.
If I were him, I think I'll find it boring, to have everything EXACTLY like him.
If I were him, I'll be as good as him, but NEVER be able to be BETTER THAN him.
(LOL syok sendirinya)
If I were him, things that are unique about me will no longer be unique, because
if I were you then everything about me will be gone.
If I were him, I'm no longer me.

Then what's the point of being him?

Therefor

If I were him, earth will less one unique human being.
If I were him, you may like so much of him, but not anything about me.
If I were him, I'll be like a pirated DVD copy of him.
If I were him, then there is no fun of being me.

Since I'm not him, and you see the better in him, why not you make me BETTER than him?
So all the wonders that I dream of could come true?
Where I'll be winning your heart,
I'll be making you laugh every single day.
I'll be bringing you to the place you wanna be,
I'll be spending at least 4 figure of RM cash on you from now till by the end of this year.
I'll be showing you the wonders of my life, the friends I hang out with, the places I go to...dot dot dot dot.........
I'll be rest assured that I'll be a part of helping you to solve your problem.
taking you out for a movie will become NOTHING at all, which means,
I'll be bringing you out many many many times...
I'll be the guy that you want to spend time with most of the time.

SO who is him?

Your Dream Guy = Him.

I may not be him, but you always could make me BETTER THAN him.
You may not see it, but I do.
Because I know the hearts for you in me will do almost everything and almost whatever it takes to be BETTER THAN him.

Because.....
If I love you, that will always be what I am willing to do.

To be BETTER THAN your DREAM GUY.

Hence, I will no longer be your DREAM GUY, but your PERFECT GUY that is REAL.

This is my first SYOK SENDIRI post after so many years.
^^V

Failure in Management Assignment.

2010-04-07T16:03:00.016+08:00

In this sem, I have a goal, which is to meet up with Li Yi's standard, try at least aim for a good grades for all my subjects, ideally an A at least, A- also no prob.
On top of that, I have another aim also, to PREPARE myself for degree.
I never manage to work on preparations on subjects like Math and Physics, but I did put much efforts on a few things that I want to improve on.

This sem, is my LAST semester for Foundation studies,
means another words, I won't get to see those BIO STREAM people anymore, perhaps some people who are from PHY STREAM who is going to kampar.
I have another goal too, which is at least get to know some other people besides your same old cliques.

So I decided, why not go simply join different group for every assignments?

As for Management Studies, I joined the group of girls who have the same timetable with me which is of course from the BIO STREAM. I joined them through the BIO STREAM guy that I know from last sem's Public Speaking Tutorial, along with another QUIET guy with him.

Weng Keong and Sey Hian.

So as for the girls, they are Anne, Yi Ying, Zhi Xian, Seng Peng & Mei Wei

When I first join in the team, I immediately have in mind,
"Alrite make sure you work hard and do my best for the team that is like ALREADY establish."

Why so? Cause ONCE again... I get to team up with BIO GROUP of people, and AGAIn I'm the ONLY Physics Stream dude. Yes BIO GROUP of people seems to be very happening compared to Physics stream, maybe ONLY from my point of view, but judging by what I can see on facebook, BIO STREAM people seems to be the more outgoing one, and perhaps also MORE English speaking Chinese people.
I think because they got more GIRLS that why so happening.. LOLX.

So I joined in this group, first week, just meeting etc etc.
But what I FORGOT to do is... INTRODUCE MYSELF!

That is the most NOOBISH me okay, because.. I have INTRODUCING self phobia.
Because... my name is NOT EASY to remember,
I don't have the cool and chillax and easy "SELF INTRODUCTION" character program in me.

But I think till the 3rd day, I'm like.. OI! INTRODUCE YOURSELF LA! GROUPMATE DOn'T INTRODUCE YOURSELF is like not doing a part as a groupmate.

So yes, I think about 2nd day or 3rd day only I introduced myself to the girls.
NOOB RITE?

Initially, we started off in this group, WITHOUT a leader, but from outside, MORE LIKELY the one who talk the most, should be the leader.
So from my point of view, I see that is either Weng Keong or Anne is to be a leader because Weng Keong brought me in, and Anne looks more like the leader of the girls.

I... am just someone who JOINS in this establish clique.
But I have this thought in my mind,
"I will be a good groupmate, and try to defend this team so that they don't fall."
Yes, instead of being a STRIKER, MIDFIELDER, GOALKEEPER, I AM THE DEFENDER.

That was my original plan. But, never did I know I became the MIDFIELDER, just like my position that I'm so called "suited" to play in the field.

Why MIDFIELDER?

Because we have COMMUNICATION PROBLEM.
I thought that since they are from BIO STREAM people, meaning that ok they most likely see each other often for ONE SEMESTER at least they should ROUGHLY know each other. But I was wrong.

The problem is that, Weng Keong was more likely the leader and yet he was quite lost during the process of doing the assignment in terms of like managing the team.
Our first task was to find SWOT(Strength,Weakness, Opportunity, Threats) for Panasonic, we did it QUITE smoothly but he was like.. READING.. word by words..
Taking his time, analyzing... the more he analyze the more I see he's like can't tell it to the group that HEY, NOW WE COMPLETED THIS WHAT's NEXT.

So of course seeing such thing happen, I didn't go there and just laugh and don't care.
I've make my stand that I'm going to defend this team."
So I told him, HEY! WE ALREADY GAO TIM THIS, then add on my suggestion where to head next.

Today is the day where I will have to present both subjects of mine.
Management & Drama Presentation.. and after our presentation, only we find out our mistakes in assignments. A mistake that SHOULDN'T have been made.

As time goes by, our "Organization Chart" became like this

Dotted lines means they are an assistant to someone,
NOPE don't look at it as they work under me, that is why I purposely draw myself in the center.

Weng Keong has problem communicating with the girls as in he never go and ask like..
"So how's your progress?" or "Hey I've found out about this and that, so what you think?" and so on.

He did informed them to gather, and we DID.
Delegation of task is there, BUT PROGRESS of making sure and keeping up-to-date about assignment progress wasn't there.

So I instead of being a Defender, I became a Midfielder.
Handling the flow of communication between both sides, and also doing my part to GATHER all informations aka compiling information. In another words, Attacking and Defending also I do.

So this is the Formation that I could summarize based on our performance.

Alrite, enough of football.
The communication flaws start to show up last minute.
What happen?

We just FAIL to hand up an assignment with correct APA format,
because our Goalkeeper never catch the ball properly, let people score goal liao.
Our Striker also so lost and panic, again never call for backup where he could.
So is like we not only cannot score goal, but LET PEOPLE SCORE THE GOAL.

For me, I don't mind facing the lecturer pointing out the mistake, but I think it isn't cool for my other groupmates.
Because such critiques if is POSITIVE, I will have to face it every single day, in fact I think I will also have to face NEGATIVE ONE's.

I trusted Weng Keong to know what to do in this, but sadly he himself also like never call me when he knows that he didn't have the rest of the assignments to readjust it back. GG.com

Songs that are similar that perhaps you people don't realize.

2010-04-02T23:45:00.004+08:00

Alright this entry I post hope that some people in the world will go google about it and hope they stumble upon this so called "informative" information by someone who is "music sensitive".

I REALLY HATE those songs that are new that they actually so called COPY the tune or main tune or style from other style w/o claiming or telling others that they are INSPIRED by some songs and then they sing it.

Here are some examples.

First song: In My Head by Jason Derulo
Copy from: Just Dance by Lady Gaga

I KNEW THIS BEFORE THIS GUY MASH IT UP. Key also same, music arrangement also same.

Second song:Tounge Tied by Faber Drive
Copy from: Over You by Chris Daughtry

These two song(Tounge Tied and Over You) many people will won't be able to detect it, cause 1st they change the key. But what are the similarities is you can fit both lyrics into their song, and perhaps sequence.
They both start with strumming, and then chorus part their vocals turn rock.
Chord sequence also very the same, maybe certain part not the same but overall they just sound the same to me. Okay, one is Tongued Tied the other is Over You, one angry and sad one stun, so mood maybe different. But try to TRANSPOSE either one of the song's key to the same, play the chord sequence, and sing it, then you'll hear the similarities. This is not that obvious

There are others which I can't think of it yet, I'll post it up when I stumble upon any again.

Songs like Already Gone by Kelly Clarkson and Graduation by Vitamin C, at least they admit. But taht Jason one.. really beh tahan. Although is nice.. but pls laa Lady Gaga's idea okay!

That is why sometimes I like to hear those Jrock songs cause Japanese is almost all the time they are very ORIGINAL, and their technique of music arrangement is really unique, they will start with some chord sequence that sounds weird until they go chorus you'll start to feel like want to repeat the song at your heart.

Meaningless like Pitbull I like to listen also although sometimes I feel really annoyed listening to how he repeat "I know you want me, you know I wancha" reason is because is original! The beat and everything is just nice ONLY IF you hear in a good speaker that has bass on it otherwise it will be some guy trying to seduce girls with same thing mumbling over and over again.

I think this could be something so called "interesting" that I can post about.
Posting about music copycats.

So disappointing man to hear copycats, especially when they are some rich superstar, they shouldn't be running out of ideas man. So many song writers they can hire, so many possibilities of songs that you can compose based on 12 black and white keys on the piano. Use 12P12=12! therefor there are like 479001600 ways at least to arrange the notes in one bar. So in one song got many many bar.. so from there if you talk about the notes are dependent to your first bar then it will be + again 12P12, if is independent then you X multiple more and more..
I don't see any reason why they could "run out of ideas".

Even if they run out of ideas, at least just say it loud that you get the idea from.. somewhere a.k.a INSPIRED by. Piff to the max, what if their songs are being used/copied.

Nuffnang makes me have a purpose to blog

2010-04-02T12:53:00.002+08:00

Lol, last time I blog all the crap.. seems meaningless cause at the end of the day,
people read your blog and go like.... "OH" and then they'll never come and talk to me about it nor comment anything.

But yet, I still go on.. blogging.. cause I was like thinking, I blog because I want to share my "dramatic" stories to people. I can write along, generate a lot of ideas, NO PROBLEM. But would people be interested in reading my blog?

People say that my blog entries very long, I tell them.. with the same reply how they response towards me "OH".

Yea.. just "OH".. lol cause... I blog to actually do two things at a time,
1) To record down in a web host so that people could help me remember.
2) To record down in the web so that I could someday read.

Regardless of how little are my readers are.. I still blog.
Because I just want to write it down so that when one day I got bored, or so called need "inspiration" then I can go read back.

Somehow my blog entry CONTRIBUTE to those random people who google some keyword that so happen to be in my blog entry. Instead of being a tool to update my friend. LOL.
Or maybe... to INSPIRE PEOPLE through my very "dramatic" or "interesting life and thoughts.

O! AND ALSO KEPOH WHO LOOK AT ME ONE KIND! and somore err those KEPOH who wanna know what am I going to write about the girl I like!
8-D Ahh.. you all are my motivation to blog, because you all are my LOYAL supporter!<3

But friends who once in a while read my blog, I don't blame you, because I don't update regularly, I can promise you to update regularly if you request or instead I can just you know find you in real life or call up to update you. =D
Even if I no time also I can make time to write 1 paragraph. As long as guarantee more words in the facebook status lo.

I've check out nuffnang, and apparently
http://www.nuffnang.com.my/blog/2010/03/29/gatsby/

They got this event going on where you ADVERTISE this event, then they give you RM50 if you so happen to be the chosen 400 contestant.
Similar ways to encourage us to blog by them and is ongoing since.. before I even join nuffnang. (You see even me also switch from wordpress to blogger for nuffnang sake)
This ad community through blogging is a smart idea I would say because..

Nowadays, our main media is more like blog already.
You want to download stuff also can go to blog and download.
So smart people also do business through blogging.

This idea kinda remind me of...
The MMORPG game instead of paying to play, they now change their style to give you play for free, then sell virtual items that you 100% NEED to maintain your ranking with a "reasonable" pay.
So as for this idea, is more like.. they encourage us to blog, but in return they gain WORLDWIDE publicity with a cheaper price. Instead of spending big money on BILLBOARD where only those who need to go through traffic jam to see it, or Television where I think now most of us seldom see it(due to streamings and downloadings on the net), blog is like going to take over most of the media to spread information.

I'm not saying that other media will die off, because newspaper is still like RM1.20 with COUNTLESS article inside. I'm saying that I got a feeling that someday everybody will be a part of a blogger community till other media will play a different role or perhaps ads will be less or CHEAPER.

You see now how kids and uncle aunties starting to use Facebook?
How did it happen I also don't know.
Why I don't see uncle auntie or kids using friendster when friendster was hot?
See now Friendster is trying to change like Facebook also I don't think they'll get back most of their old user back.

Maybe I'll write about an entry about facebook, so that my blog hits will sure to strike :D

Lets go back to my topic, yea..
I think I might want to try to blog about that event for the sake of... that RM50?
But I see like.. very fake la if I blog about it, say like I want to go, and then if I don't win then what am I going to do with that entry? Delete?

But if I win, then who should I go with also? Time Square ler, if is Pyramid then I sure blog already la.
I sure do have ideas how to blog about it, so I guess I will have to wait for other more better offers or maybe some of you can convince me to blog about it then only I will. Otherwise, I don't see the "fun" part of blogging to advertise that if my heart is not there. XD

So nuffnangers who blog hop until here, when you visit me, you can post ur link over there--> then I'll at least load the page of your blog even if I don't read every entries :D

This will so called "encourage" to blog more.

My first and maybe last achievement before leaving PJ campus(UTAR)

2010-03-31T21:06:00.003+08:00

Is nothing big I know, but to me I feel contented because the 15 year old me, the 16 year old me, 17 year old me, 18 year old me.. until the 19 year old++ me would never be brave enough to go for it.
NEVER.

This competition only have 12 contestant including me.
I was the last to present, imagine the so called "pressure" that I have to take.

I get sources that most of them were force, but I was the one who saw the a4 size poster and decided to email Miss Samantha about my participation.
I see the A4 size poster, I felt he thrill there, and thinking myself should I join since midterm and assignment deadlines is all coming soon.

Good thing that the time limit is FIVE MINUTES, so is just like our presentation during tutorial. So is like again repeating what we have done before.

Why did I decided to join it?
1) I want to eliminate the fear of presenting in front of people, I JUST HATE IT where you feel scared to present, is NOT FUN.

2) I hardly join any COMPETITION that requires me to present, like singing, dancing or maybe story telling. So yea, this is my FIRST time I think joining a competition that needs presentation. I wanna see whether I could so called "be calm" when I do it or not.

3) This is my last chance of participating Inter-Utar-PA-block competition, unless my drama group will proceed to the drama competition then is not, and yea my last chance of getting a "UTAR" cert(exclude my soon to be degree or foundation cert).
4) I am far behind compare to my age group of friends who has been presenting SO FREQUENTLY. KNS, people already presenting everyday, I still in foundation and seldom present, so got chance just do it laa.

Quote Li Yi "Presentation is just at our fingertips".
So I want to so called "get use to it" again.

5) I want to see how I manage my time with assignments having a deadline, mid term, and having a really "kan chiong" thoughts on this..
Is not cool, feeling so "kan chiong" and nervous for days because of thinking about the competition. When I never finish writing the script, I felt so scared and worried. At least I learn something, that the feeling of "you don't want to screw things up" act as an motivation towards completing something.

6) My enthusiasm is low or maybe has lost actually due to dotdotdotdotdot. Like look at me, I'm so skinny, and err look so timid, and err not so the attractive... so many not so good features of my physical appearance that will make me have low self esteem. So I was thinking, screw it la, if I now also can speak in public with confidence, then when I have change physically I also will be the same la!

7) Very wuliao one, if I could sing song for girls and upload it publicly with my BAD VOICE due to lacking of vocal skills why wouldn't I have the guts to speak publicly even I'm lacking of the usage of beautiful words and grammar in my writings? A bit noob right?

The highlight of this competition is this guy Vimalan

He was my public speaking "talk show" group mate, and we OWNZ in our presentation during our "talk show" together with Shalini and Satish and one chinese guy called Chee Hau. He as our host, talk till so lan yeng cool until I sibeh enthusiastic to perform our best together with other group mate.

He helped me in my speech making by giving me the idea of the "white cloth".
Our theme for the competition is the future of the world, and when I think the future of the world, I can only first think of SHAPING THE FUTURE.
So he tells me the "White Cloth" theory, saying that blank white cloth is unpredictable. So I link it that we could paint the white cloth aka shape the unpredictable future.

The winner isn't him, but some Indian girl I think is Sujesha gua I forgot.. who uses notes to present if I never remember wrongly.
But she was really PRO, although many use notes, most of them where like speaking as if the note is just not there at all.
Full of energy and power till the judge commented that they could go for English Degree and become lecturer.

My topic was simple, and don't even bother to research and give real life happenings like 9-11, bombing in Mumbai, riots in Thailand etc etc.
I just "slumberly" speak out of my points that I could think of because I only AIM to present steadily, that's all. Never thought of winning by using Google to search for PRO Journalist's article to guide me.

Well I guess I manage to find back that "Slumber Shungz".
Pui Kei said that my voice was soft.. but I could here my own echo.

The judge commented on.. well my hair ><
But sigh, is okay.. I keep my hair is because I know that when I work as an Engineering I no longer can have fancy hairstyle. He said my hair was half covering my face the whole time, lol if my fringe was how it was when I didn't cut it, I'll look like an emo presenting wei HAHAHA.

He said that I should put more enthusiasm in it and my conclusion should make it MORE STRONGER.

My ending was like this,
"Let us shape our future with a good heart, just like a painter, painting the blank white cloth with a magnificent art".

I felt that was my limit, he says I could do better..
Maybe I'll try to think of how to make that line to be more IMPACTFUL.
Anyway I speak with a little warning, and a lot of disappointment and like as if I am considering on something..
Now I know what they want in public speaking, Serious and Lively.
Meaning I have to like explode like TNT or Nuclear BOMB and there is formality there.
That is what THEY want in a pro public speaking.. Woooooooooo..

Today is just not my day..

2010-03-29T19:52:00.013+08:00

Sienness to the max.

1) First my management assignment that I've been very hardcore doing it, it seems that we have problem on the spacing. I think some of them weren't looks like 1.5 at all, but my group mate Colin aka Weng Keong said it is. So.... whatever laa.. ish

2) I went back 10am++ to get my stuff, and then get something done with the "stuff".
UNFORTUNATELY, I am like the MOST UNLUCKIEST BEING ON EARTH.
First I go to subang square. I even take my time to eat my NOOB SHIT food at the Salmon steak I use to love, but sohem knn cb they serve the so called "honey chicken" french fries also give so little and charge me RM6. Eat chicken RM6? Eat McD also more worth it. So the shop is closed, I NEED to get it now, and I don't know WHAT TIME and WILL that shop open, what should I do?
-get it done by 2moro, which means include purchasing it.
-go to KL to get the product(since is still 1am)

3)I choose 2nd choice because I was like okay, I have time and I WANT TO get it done by today. I went to the mall beside Kota Raya, where Pico introduced me that sells LOTSA ANIME AND ENGLISH SERIES for a VERY CHEAP PRICE. BUT I WAS THE TUUUUUUUUUUUUUUT UNLUCKY THE MALL ACTUALLY CLOSED DOWN!

So what's next? Give up?

No, try search around.
UNFORTUNATELY, turns out that I can't find it in the SO CALLED STREET that has everything, "Petaling Street". But nevertheless, I explored the so called "You can get everything in that street"and know what we can get there.
Well is just me being me, I love EXPLORING, because there is where I get all my ideas from.

4)Oh not to forget, my another SUINESS.. when I was in Subang heading towards KL, I parked at Asia Jaya's LRT parking. SUI TO THE MAX, the parking was RM3 per hour, Kelana Jaya's one and Tmn Bahagia is like RM2 for whole day I think. But I know is DEFINATELY CHEAPER! I chose Asia Jaya because is in the middle of back towards my place and towards KL and towards my campus in case if either one of the plan fail.

Seriously what's SO VALUEBLE ABOUT PJ's land(the state area), SO WHAT IF ALL THE IMPORTANT BUILDING IS THERE? Don't have Pyramid no any super geng mall but one Amcorp (mini)Mall then the value so high? Jaya One expensive, where is located near all the FACTORIES... and is in Jln Universeti, where UM is there, and UTAR is there.
SO WHAT? I don't see the VALUE of PJ.To me Subang Jaya still owns the so called Bandaraya Petaling Jaya. Asia Cafe, Snowflakes, Pan Mee, Taipan, USJ19 digital mall, Pyramid, Sunway Lagoon, FTZ, Silva mamak and other mamak in Subang, ss14 bah kut teh, BEATS the bandaraya PJ or the so called "State" many many many times man.

Sadly, schools like Catholic High, UTAR, UM, and Ipoh chicken rice, A&W just have to be located in that NOT SO COOL AREA. No well known place for people like us to hangout. Jaya One is just a money sucker place where the Cold Storage has to sell Coke with the price of RM1.39, expensive MAMAK, and car park rental for their basement, what's more the iARTS printing shop also charge 10 sen for staple and I think 20sen or more for the big staple bullet, and their photocopy is 20sen per copy. I don't blame those stores like mamak and cold storage for charging more expensive due to the rental is sure high but iarts is RIDICULOUS! 10sen per page is already consider quite ex as there are printing shops nearby at the flats which u need to walk at least 5-10mins+. I guess they just wanna do the BIG BUSINESS like printing REAL stuff to discourage us from photostating a few copy of lecture slides. Jaya One do not have McD, but got sohai Wendy's. I feel that McD didn't want to pick that location cause the rental is high, if Jaya One have mcD SCREW ALL THE CAFE which sells MORE EXPENSIVE than McD during lunch time, McD got aircond and wifi, maybe some do not have the socket for our laptops, but still I RATHER EAT FAST FOOD RATHER THAN EXPENSIVE LOCAL FOOD that don't worth so ex in a commercial building which is AINT COOL AT ALL. Nowadays, I feel that cafe only focuses on the AMBIENCE rather than the food and drinks.

5)So yes, I used LRT instead of driving all the way to KL.
GO buy the LRT ticket, the CIBAI malay girl go charge me RM3 where it cost only RM2, I only found out when I pay it through the machine. Okay, maybe this is just me being noob. But WHY LA WANNA TIPU MY RM1!

So after failing to find what I wanna buy, I drove all the way back to Subang.
Is not sohai, but is because I've this thought on my mind.

"Subang Jaya rulez..."
What you want to buy in KL, most of it Subang Jaya now also got already.
No need so sohai to go to that so called main city to get what you want.
Perhaps there are things that are SO MUCH cheaper there but FOR US SUBANG JAYA people is just NOT WORTH it to go there to get everything there all the time unless we want to buy things in a BIG BULK. To travel around in KL now with much more "convenient train" is also like cost as much as your petrol, don't forget, THROUGH AND FLOW. Furthermore Monorail is knncb expensive, where it is the train that we who don't drive in KL will have to use to get to places like Sungei Wang, Lowyat, and other plaza that sells "CHEAPER" or Cheap stuff. Don't forget we also have to go back by LRT. Use KTM is like using "Kena Tunggu Maaaa" I ANTI-KTM! But they have routes towards those kampung areas in Selangor that are close to the border of Perak and Pahang, they FREAKING NEED THEM and yet that train is slower than car travelling.
Is not a train, is called a turtle moving on track.

So I went back, because I want to avoid more uncertainties... and just tomorrow after class STRAIGHT GET THINGS DONE.

This should only tell me,but not to you readers one thing,
this is how I should be when it comes to SERIOUS STUFF you just have to get it done LIKE THAT no matter what are the hassles are.

So instead of skipping Management Class to get things done with the "stuff" that I bought, I immediately drove back all the way to PJ to resume my studies and stay until 6pm for webpage test.

How was it?
Again and again... this feeling is not cool.
Knowing where to find the answer in the slides, but forgetting the exact thingy is just sux. Although my current status still in a satisfactory lvl, but the PREPARATION FOR TEST and MAINTAIN My leisure time plus settling the assignment with extra weeks before the due date is just not there.

Yes, I've somore joined Public Speaking competition.
Because... I was afraid of it few years back..
I want to take this chance to at least practice it, since is a competition so the even serious mode is there..

4)My last suiness for the day is, my UTAR mail just can't load.
I've sent an IMPORTANT mail to one of my lecturer and need to view it by today, and they just TUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUT fail me, yea might as well say the word fuck straight.

I've informed the ICT division earlier, the one near the comp lab and the one near the tutorial classes. BUT NO! Now 2 hours++ liao still cannot see.

HOW SUI CAN I BE LAAA!

KANASAI LA!

2010-03-26T16:45:00.003+08:00

The blogger dependent/suggested template got problem with the POSITIONING.
My side bar instead of loading at the side, it loads at the bottom. CH* B**

KNS!
So I have to change to some blogger independent for the time being.
Is time to work on template design soon

Hardcore!

2010-03-23T21:44:00.004+08:00

This week, I got three things in mind need to settle.

1)Management Midterm
2)Web page stuff
3)Management Assignment settle 80%

Is the 4th week of my sem 3 weeks remaining.
I have an objective set by Liyi
She ask me to take this opportunity to pull up my CGPA.

I was HOPING at least an A, but guy like me seems like NEVER get an A even is an EASY score subject. Which I don't even understand WHY.
SPM my Moral didn't get an A, Math also I didn't get an A, how sad is that.

I just want to be for ONCE an academic good student.
I don't want to stuck in a strong C grade student.

My MMORPG online game era has GONE, is just SOOO sad, and I also don't chase after anime's or any english series... so sadddd...

I'm now in the state of getting myself the HARDCORE putting effort in studies mode.
Well I've manage to set time even though it will consider VERY LITTLE to bookworms out there.

But.. oh well.. lets see how it goes... AGAIN.
I really do hope in degree time I could set bots for all my games, so that I can be in the gaming world at the same time don't spend so much time on it.. Well you may disagree with me that BOTS kills an online game, but think properly..
Does it worth your time to HUNT daily stuff, kill bosses that are controlled by AI's, farm for resources?
The FUN part of online gaming is only player vs player activities, other than that.. NAH.

Maybe I'll still stick to RO.. that noob game.. perhaps, I'll try other new game..
See how it goes.

I have too many things in life that I just want to be involve with,
if I could manage all things well, plus having the time to blog,
oh yeaaa... that would be seriously GREAT.

So I think I can conclude my current stage now,
in the quest for time management which is a MUST for me to reach my vision of becoming..............................

Specially dedicated to those whom are going to Kampar Utar xD

2010-03-21T20:21:00.003+08:00

From your ONE of your senior aka my friend.

Oh! Finally BUSY

2010-03-15T23:13:00.002+08:00

What is busy to me?

Busy is when you actually CANNOT make time for it.
According to dictionary: actively or fully engaged or occupied.

But for me, busy is when you know you got a lot of things to do and you just HAVE TO give up on certain matters that meant a bit, or a lot to you.

I've seen bloggers who can actively blog and go on well with their studies.
But most of the time, if they are ACTIVE bloggers they don't do other stuff that requires commitment too.

So probably they'll kill two bird with one stone like they blog/msn/facebook.

Today the FLY.FM was talking about personal assistant, and the so called DRAMA or agenda was that Phat Fabes needed a PA(Personal Assistant) suggested by Ben and Nadia said, Phat Fabes say that PA should do everything for him. So then this is where the question arise, What should a PA shouldn't do.

Lol, think of it, I think if next time my blog hits strikes and I have readers wanting to read my blog every single day, I WILL hire a PA and ask her to blog.
I hope that PA will be someone I know, whom I can talk to, but of course not my lifetime partner, cause otherwise she'll be lazy to blog for me.

If that doesn't happen, create a program that can recognize voice(as in improve the voice recognition tech) and let it blog.
Or perhaps, hire some secondary school kids who LOVE to get paid to blog.

But... what are my odds of having millions of readers that will be interested to visit here to read what I have to say? :D

Anyway, I'm "busy" because my deadlines is very near, so I EXPECT that when all this is done, I should be FREE, not just more FREE but VEEEERY FREE.

I the noob. U fail=I fail

2010-03-12T20:54:00.000+08:00

3 months, I thought my effort could make a difference.
With patience, with all the ideas I could think of to make you understand, but the results says it all.

I know that I have my task have limits to change the outcome cause I'm not the one sitting for exam, but it seems that I just can't make your results from failing to a pass.
The best part is you do pay me some $ as fees, now is more like I am the bloodsucker.

Is not cool, this will just lower down my esteem.
First experience of teaching, fail to hit the target.
Somore I only teach you and CY, 2 people only.

I've even stay overtime w/o charging extra to maintain the principle
"I will go off when you all understand, otherwise I won't go off till I completed my task to make you understand."

Drawing pictures and create various ways to make you remember,
which a normal Math teacher won't do.

Trying to make you see things differently such as overcoming the thoughts that the subject is meant for smart people.

Seeing the motivation of ur learning progress is not there, I tried to persue you to work harder to at least practice some questions, but you didn't do. Only towards the end only u start doing.. but I never persue about it, but instead thinking that..
certain question shouldn't be a problem for you anymore.. as you showed me how you finally know how to do the PMR maths after various tries of explaining/interpreting.

I know who am I teaching, it's suppose to be a quite a challenge for me.
But I was confident that I can change things. But fail.
Because U fail=I fail.

Although I've change ur PMR results, but I fail to change ur SPM results.
I really wonder if is there anything that I taught you that will be useful for you,
if there is I'm glad.

I've told my friend Mel whom thinks that is TOO LATE for me to do a miracle.
But I was confident that it is possible, but turn up it was what she said too late.

I'll always remember this outcome,
although I still can be positive thinking that I did my part, but I know that I'll remember that today my AP a.k.a Achievement Point has reduced.

Sorry. Nevertheless, I do hope you can proceed to your design course as you wanted.
I remember I said this before
"Maths could train your brain how you apply things, is not restricted to only memorizing formula, proving equations and calculating.. it makes you THINK and perhaps makes you to think OUT OF THE BOX when you want to try to solve the question."

Hope that lessons with you two experience really helps.

Stuff that I discover..

2010-03-10T17:49:00.000+08:00

During.. foundation times in UTAR.

So I actually came to foundation with like no motivation to go for classes.
I was depress till the core because I've lost someone whom I can talk to often to share out my opinions to, and instead of ascending to degree I'm here again in the same spot.

My friends are all proceeding to degree, one by one flying to oversea..
Diploma one graduating. I thought that I'll be like the only person who's gonna be the one who can't make it due to Form 6/STPM results.
But as I go along from sem 1 and sem 2, I slowly find out one by one that there are PEOPLE LIKE ME. That's like a consolation I'm suppose.
So for the LOVE of Mechatronics, for the LOVE of being someone I want to be, this is how much I wouldn't mind sacrifice, which I think a normal human being won't do so.
Thank God I know someone who's in my class that actually same case like me, it gives me the feeling of "Oh ok, maybe is not so bad."

But as Pui Yeng says:
"He has his purpose."
So perhaps I should learn to see things differently and take this opportunity to OBSERVE anything that could make me do an analysis about anything which I think is interesting. Literally ANYTHING that I can say is like What I see is What I MIGHT get if I understand why I must see or want to see or will see.

So I discover that there are actually remaining of very bad habits in me such as being lazy to keep in track with my studies.
To me keeping in track with my studies is AT LEAST spend a few hours a day just to see see/look look/scribble scribble anything related to my studies.

I've always blame that I know what could actually motivate me to screw this bad habit, but SADLY such thing that I wish it exist just don't exist.
I used to hate the word PRACTICE, especially when you practice doing maths, is like so ROBOT. Even though the question can so tricky that twist and turn I don't find it a joy to practice, and sometimes you just do those questions that are TOO EASY for you expecting to slowly ascend to the hard question, but sadly you've lost the patience and motivation to continue to the CHALLENGING one.

Till then I discover WHY we need to practice.
Is clearly so because that we humans have limitations.
You see we can memorize things and understand things easily sometimes but HOW LONG can we keep it in us that's another thing.
So I manage to discover and understand something called "Muscle Memory" plays a VERY IMPORTANT ROLE in here,
-Muscle Memory is like cache in computer. Storing files for future use so that no need so mafan need to load all over again, so won't so LAG. Like we human, we also can LAG too although we can give output.

2nd limitations of humans is that we need to REST to gain productivity,
-I think many will say why must you state the obvious, but NOPE to some people they just like to study study study study till they stop when they are satisfied.

So as for Muscle Memory, I discover this when I think.. hmmm..
I know what are the steps to solve things, or in football I know how to dribble the ball but why isn't my body is RESPONDING to what is being COMMAND?
So I've concluded that you need to make it part of you till your body recognize it, such as for me I read, then I write it down once, and it was last minute work and I use my hand to write first instead of thinking whether the answer is correct or not.
In the end yea it kinda work.
How you know whether you have mastered it and become part of you?
Is when you see such situation again, you respond towards it without being excited anymore.

Just like when you memorized what your mum always say to you, you can actually remember every single word, tone and timing of her sentence.

Humans need rest, as for me I always say I need afternoon nap, but my afternoon nap always ends up sleeping from like 2pm can sometime sleep till evening 7pm or 8pm.
Which results me to wake up in the middle of the night and stay awake to at least 3am. That time I still have Xue to talk to me during that hour, now no more, so I have to plan to sleep early =D

Since is a MUST that we have to rest, I've always consider this as this is something that must be put into calculation whereby we minus away our available time to do any activity. But now a days, seems like many youngsters are not having a good sleeping habits

Talking about rest, I discover this when I am been forced to stay awake to study finish in a day because is SO last minute, and as I go on with my work, I realize that my rate of understanding and input is dropping drastically. So drastic such as instead of a few minutes break I can take like 10 minutes break after each part I study, then I'll go wonder off to facebook for a while look around.
I know that my body is still active, but just SADLY my mind is just tired.

After Sem2, so happen I see that they are actually things that are AWAITING for me to accomplish. So I believe that should make me have to make a move.
I won't mention now but my current goal that Li Yi set for me is

Take advantage on sem3's subject, aim to score.

Furthermore is only 3 subjects.
3 NON science and math subjects.
In my life I never had such achievement in academic where I really DO score.
I never had anything that can be tested academically and perform with a 80%++ score.
(Don't mention about primary school)

My 2nd goal is to be mentally and physically prepared for degree.
At least try to perfect PRE-U standard of Maths and Physics, which I may still need them along the way. I think that will be next when I'm done with the discipline to study and prepare for exam early.

I DO NOT HAVE SUCH DISCIPLINE yet.

Good thing IvaliceRO die off, Dragonica cannot bot, all the game that I play die off, makes me want to be involve in programming to make me create a bot.
Long entry again, but I lazy to summarize again.